NightlyDreams's Xanga

dream...

Thu, 15 May 2008 07:00:44 GMT

There was a house I seemed to have some type of work with. It was old and antique a two story. With hidden passage ways and different places to hide from other people.
the people let me out of the house and I turned around and asked to come back in. I knocked on the door but no one answered so I eased my way in and asked for permission to come in. I finally found someone in the entry room to the side. i found a hidden passage in a bookcase by turning a lever on it. Then the lady that was in the room said there were no more passage ways to find. Yet I found one that revealed a hole in the center of the room going down into the ground.
Next I was in a class room with my brother. At least he looked similar to my brother still having the longer hair as in my last dream. He was younger too. We were suppose to be listening to a special music. It was some type of opera. I left the room. And found a beautiful path along the Natchez Trace (near where I actually live) and it was all blooming. Somehow it was suppose to be similar to a bike. This tree limb would get you to where you were going. I think it was a dogwood tree limb. I turned it into the "bike" place. But it wasn't the place were I originally got the tree limb from so I asked for my tree limb back. And went next door to return it.
Back at the school I was talking to some teachers about Kenny Rogers and a few other things I wanted to remember to tell my boss at work today (this is actually real she loves kenny rogers and he'll be at tunicas horseshoe casino on the 17th i hope i remember to tell her today). I went back towards the original room I left my brother in to listen to music. I didn't go intot he room because the music had started. I was in the room with the musicians though. The room they sang in was much quieter than the actual class room the listeners were in. they didn't have to raise their voices. They opened them and the sirens sounded. I know it was suppose to sound beautiful but it was a little disturbing and almost sounded like a different type of siren. One that alerted you to bad things.... destructive things.

dream

Wed, 14 May 2008 03:52:58 GMT

I was in my house. I was having another episode where nothing was as it seemed and it had to do with boxed up computers that were broken and damaged. I had my upset about whatever it was. And my parents finally paid attention to me. Then we had the discussion about the computers. They were going to get rid of them. I told them to just give them to my brother he might be able to fix it since he likes to tinker on computers.
In the middle of this it seemed I was involved in some type of weird plot trying to escape something of mystery and the murders that were going on around me had sent me into exile.
My brother received a call that snapped me out of whatever delusion I was involved in. He was on the phone and instantly sad about something. It was like someone had died. And now there was a huge group of people at our "antique" house.
I heard someone say something about the hurricane hitting a certain area. And it always hit that certain area.
My brother gave me instruction as to what I needed to do for him to make sure what needed to be done was done. I told my mom about how I had to forget about what was going on and help him. I walked by a mirror huge antique gold framed mirror that was sitting on the floor. It had smudges on it. I had to help my brother.
I forgot what it was that needed my help. I went to ask him again and he introduced me to his relatives. My brother had long brown hair with gold flecks in it. And his uncles were also just as flamboyant. I say uncles now but I wasn't really sure if I was meeting two women, two men, or a man and woman. All I knew was that they were a couple.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Tue, 13 May 2008 22:11:15 GMT

It's really hard to let people into your life. It's hard to open up and show them your vulnerabilities. It's hard to take the mask off, break down the walls, and open up.
So sometimes we leave... sometimes we run... sometimes we hide from everything. I don't know what exactly I'm trying to say. But sometimes we have events happen that change us forever. And sometimes our minds get stuck in that space and time and we can't get out of it.
And we beat ourselves up... kill ourselves from the inside out. With words and negativity that tears us apart. There's more than one way to kill someone......

Then there are people that know how to bring other people out of this. They just have that gift. They are special people.

But sometimes it's not enough to have special people in your life. Sometimes there is nothing that can bring someone out of that space. Sometimes they just have to cry and have time. Sometimes they have to work threw those horrible emotions.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Mon, 12 May 2008 16:53:55 GMT

I've been laying low lately. Trying to catch up on my sleep a little. It feels wonderful to finally get some.
I think I have talked to more people the past few days than I have the whole year about life death and the grace of being in the right and wrong place in life at the right and wrong time. And about the choices we make that get us there... And how common sences can get you out of a lot of fuzzy situations... along with the fact that god protects children and fools when they don't know. Or something like that...
I desided I'm never going on another diet again Why torture yourself with that?
Tomorrow is my freinds birthday. I called her today not knowing if it was her birthday today or tomorrow. I knew it was the 13th but not sure what day it was where she lives... across the seas.
It was so great to hear from her. And she loved her present which I sent off a few weeks ago. And we got to talk about the baby and how he cuddles up with her and tigger every night (I bought him tigger for his birthday this year).
And they may come visit soon when he's a little bigger and out of diapers I can't wait.

another sleepless night...

Sat, 10 May 2008 23:10:03 GMT

If you are anywhere near me in the country get in your basement. That means anywhere underneath memphis and around...
I don't think I've recovered from the other day.
And I think I could totally use a hug and someone to hold me at this point. I hate stuff and nights like tonight.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Sat, 10 May 2008 07:20:37 GMT

This no-sleeping thing is getting old. And this not dreaming thing is really getting to me too. The only thing I am getting is fragments of living threw tornado dreams. So I am going to try something new today.
Beautiful flower pictures

Friday, May 09, 2008

Fri, 09 May 2008 19:32:17 GMT

Some pictures from yesturday I copied off customers photos...

These maybe only interesting to me since I was in this but.... the first 3 pictures were from the middle of walmart parking lot where i work and the last was from a highway just up the way from us. Still amazed...

Friday, May 09, 2008

Fri, 09 May 2008 01:41:59 GMT

I'm completely exhausted and can't sleep. I guess since I went so long not being able to stay awake now I will go threw a time of not being able to sleep? Hmph!
Anyway I woke up at midnight to find another little present. It looked like a baby mouse. It was all curled up in the fetal position. I felt sorry for it. It was rather cute. I guess the cat did her job though. I don't guess I could chastise her for killing a cute mouse?
I slept a little but dreamed of the tornado. More like reading about it. I would like to get it out of my head and forget about it now. Too tired... way too tired and my stomache is still messed up from all the anxiety.

Todays Tornado news...

Thu, 08 May 2008 12:27:59 GMT

I went to work this morning not even know there was anything out there to get me. I am afraid of tornados. I do not like them when they are headed my way. I think it's natural to be afraid of something that could potentially kill you.
At around 7:45 my manager was alerted by our home office that there was a rotation coming threw. To get read and alert everyone. My manager came to me to find a weather radio. Well they had taken our only working one out of the fitting room and the others had been recalled. We had one still in package not doing us much good but I gave it to her. The manager said we'll let you know if anything's coming this way.
About a minute later we meaning all customers and associates were in the middle of the womens lingerie. I had one hand on Cherilyn and one hand on Susan. All the power went off and it became very very silent. Everyone was getting cell phone calls and sending cell phone calls to their family friends and everyone in the way of this event. My friend Susan whom I was very attached to at that point kept receiving calls from her husband who actually works with police dispatch. He would call tell where the rotation was what street where it was heading and all the info he could.
We stayed hunkered down for an hour. Everything you can imagine was spinning in my mind much like the clouds above.
When you go threw something like this as close as it was to us it is amazing how many things leave your mind and then come into it. You love everyone wish everyone to be safe you have no problems with anyone again. All you want to do is get out and make sure everyone is ok.
The tornados went beside the building and tore down huge trees and took power lines down. It went across the street in front of us. It tore the roof off the building only 1/2 a mile from us. My brothers work N.E.W. had a tornado sit down on the front of it's building. People were in it at the time. No one was hurt or killed in any of these tornados. My brother doesn't work in the morning times which these happened from 8 till around 9.
My job... Walmart... didn't have any power from around 8 until still now. After the tornados went threw they allowed everyone to leave except employees. When they found they were going to have no power for "who knows when" they allowed most employees to go home. 15 stayed.
I left the building and saw nothing out of the ordinary but I only live 2 miles away and it's the way nothing happened.
I wish I could show pictures but I was one of the people sitting in the floor crying. Guarantee I'm not a hero. I'm a survivor. Usually they are not the same
Anyway I'm a survivor. Maybe I'll find some pictures later on after everyone has cleaned up.

Edited: Probably the stupidest thing I heard today involving the storms was the 2nd part after the initial tornado came threw and all associates were allowed to come home... i started watching the news for the 2nd front... the news guys were taking calls and one caller asked how best they could take pictures of the tornado. They said the best way was to take your camera to the basement because that is where you are suppose to be in a tornado... IN YOUR BASEMENT!

Second edit: promised photos...
the first is N.E.W. the worst hit and where my brother works at night. Thankfully he wasn't there.
the second is a scruggs building about 1/2 mile from where i work...

basically everything is getting back to normal... most trees seem to be up on our main drag... and no one hurt. which is amazing to me.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Thu, 08 May 2008 10:54:05 GMT

i'm ok but i spent an entire hour dodging tornadoes at work. they went only feet around us this morning and damaged much of the area. my brothers job was said to be rubble (don't know if that is true) but no power and everything clear i got to come home to wait the next one.