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Phukn_Cornbread
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Name: Bubba
Country: United States
State: New Hampshire
Gender: Male
Interests: Discovering the intricacies of underwater basket weaving.
Expertise: Why do you think I am at college?
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Member Since:
12/20/2002
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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| Unfortunately, I am not sure if I can trust this site anymore. Someone may have taken information off this site and used it as a backdrop to try and screw me even more. That person might be katy Hamilton or an associate of hers.
That being the case...
I can no longer talk about anything on here. I am sorry everone. I don't have xanga premium or anything so I can't even do protected posts for those that really do want to know what is going on. It sucks... and it figures that one person has to ruin it for everyone.
Send email with user name to tombking2000@yahoo.com if you want me to find you with my new xanga site. i will send invite accordingly to those I know. This site has been completely compromised. No further posts will be put here. Sorry all.
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| True Dog StoryI used to have a Weenie Dog & I was buying a small bag of Purina Dog Chow at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog (?)
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most my orifices and IV's in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.
Horrified, she asked if I had been poisoned by the food and that is why I ended up in the hospital. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have to have CPR to get over his convulsions.
Xanga Footprints is awesome as a sidenote. I now know who actually visits and doesn't post comments 
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| Actual Craiglist entryDear Crazy-As-Bat-Shit-Lady: The fridge doesn't come with a pedigree!
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Date: 2006-06-25, 8:44AM PDT
Dear Crazy-As-Bat-Shit-Lady:
I
am honored that you chose my ad for a mini fridge out of all the ads
you could have chosen. It makes me feel good that my mini fridge will
be supplying you with the ice cold beverages you've obviously become
accustomed to.
Next time you answer one of my ads, please note the following:
1.
I am not Home Depot. If you travel thirty minutes to pick up a bulky
40-pound object, please come prepared with the necessary items you'll
need to secure it to your vehicle. Yes, I have rope. I have a lot of
rope. I have many different colors and sizes of rope. No, you can not
have my rope. The ad said I was selling a fridge, not a fridge with
rope. Nor was I selling a fridge with padding so that the pleather
seats on your piece of crap car don't get marked up.
2. What
part of 'buyer must pick up' in the ad was confusing to you? Yes, I
have a vehicle. No, I don't want to haul your fridge all the way to
East BumbleFuck on the hottest day of the year. No, I'm really really
sure I don't want to do that. No, really. I'm sure.
3. Please
call me only once with ALL your questions. I left for the day, and had
5 messages on my answering machine, the last one was at 10:30 pm.
Frankly lady, you were sounding a bit too crazy by the end of the day.
It's a fridge. A small metal box that keeps shit cold. I don't have the
fridge's family tree. For all I know the fridge's was conceived by a
slutty young Maytag that graced some hillbilly's side porch. I don't
know the exact age of the fridge. I bought it a few months ago, I used
it for a couple of days, ok, I lied, I used it a whole week. The fact
is, you're not buying a race horse, you're buying a used fridge.
4.
No, I will not knock $10 bucks off the price of the fridge because your
anal retentive eyes picked up the ittiest, bittiest hairline scratch
from across my driveway. I'm not making judgements on you, but I'm
pretty damn sure Donald Trump didn't send you across the country to
pick up a used fridge for Trump Towers. Though I'd wager the whole
concept of the mini-fridge bar is a familar one to you.
5.
Yes, you can unplug a fridge without any harm to the fridge. Believe
me, the fridge is fine. The manufacturers have figured out a way to
extend the life of a fridge that has been unplugged. Yes, I'm
absolutely sure of that. No, you did not have to leave 2 messages about
your concerns with the fridge being unplugged, and frankly it was a
little embarrassing having the same conversation with you in my
driveway where my neighbors could hear.
6. No, I don't have
the operating instructions. I can write them down for you though: Plug
fridge in. Open door. Put crap inside. Take crap out when it's cold.
Eat or drink crap.
7. I am not a fridge pimp. I don't have any
more fridges at that price. No, I don't know where you can get another
fridge at that price. Yes, I know it's in great condition for the
price, and I'm sure you'd like your other
crazy-as-bat-shit-mini-fridge-buying-friends to have one just like it,
but this is all I have. Here's a thought, there's this online
classified ads website. Yeah, you may have heard of it, it's called
CRAIGSLIST. I dunno, maybe, just maybe, in this great land of ours,
there's another mini-fridge being advertised there.
8. Please
remove my phone number from your address book. I think our relationship
is over. Oh, and if you've added me to your AIM Buddy List, please
delete me. Please. I beg you.
Yours truly,
The mini-fridge seller | | |
| There is a reason why some girls become porn stars.
It has nothing to do with their looks or body. As a matter of fact, it has to do with one simple thing:
Their limited vocabulary.
Yes, that is right! Limited vocabulary. Words such as ass, fuck, pussy, cock, hard, deep, and good. These words combined with their impecable ability to spit out sentence fragments as if they are 4th graders has won them great honors in the porn industry. Kudos to them for doing what everyone else can only dream of doing... lying on their backs while they work with no education to get them a real job! This allows all teenagers to know that they will have infinite job security in the following fields:
Retail
Fast Food
Manual Labor
Construction
Service
Because so many sluts are desperate to show off their "superior" english speaking skills, all minimum wage employees can be assured that if they ever lose their job in any way, there will be plenty more jobs to migrate into. The added bonus is that you won't have to compete for promotions either! Its almost like a two for one!
So cheer up as the future is bright for everyone else as these sluts dare to do what no woman should ever do - get fucked by random guys to please even more random guys as they jerk off to fantasies with women that can't speak grammitcally correct sentences. Yay for the great advances in human evolution...
sigh...
-----78 : I almost did drive into a guardrail once while listening to Delilah
Phkn Cornbread : omg
Phkn Cornbread : she sucks
Phkn Cornbread : i got XM because of her
Phkn Cornbread : i am NOT joking...
Phkn Cornbread : i was so sick of her ... i just dumped local stations all
together.
-----78 : But let me preface this by saying that I was changing channels and she came
on and actually was reading a heartwarming letter from someone who had lost
their loved one in the 9-11 crash...
-----78 : They were on the first plane that flew in to the tower
Phkn Cornbread : ok
-----78 : And do you know what song she played for her?
Phkn Cornbread : Another One Bites the Dust?
-----78 : Almost
-----78 : I believe I can fly | | |
| Missing out:
Yeah, I am pretty down this week. I want to be positive... but
here I am, almost 30, and I have nothing to show for it. I am
impossibly far from marriage and having a family. A house is
totally out of the question for the next 4 years. Plus, my
career... where is it? Non-existant! Yeah, I am in college
bettering myself... but so what! It almost seems pointless at
times really. Better myself for what? A life of
lonliness? A life that amounts to very little? Bleh....
I really am confused about what I should be doing. Well, take
that back a little. I know I should be in school, and I am doing
OK here. However, what is there beyond this? Work?
Ok, I like that idea. Marriage and Kids? Where?? A
house? hardly...
Seems like the things I want are so far out of reach. I feel like
I am going nowhere fast. And why am I in a hurry you ask?
Because time isn't slowing down at all! Another year has almost
passed, and another year of pretty much nothing happening. I want
more in my life... I almost want it now. 10 years of being
patient.... and I still have to wait?
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