wow.I had an awesome time in Daytona..i wish i could go back. ALOT of stuff happened, that probably shouldnt have. Now im really upset about it. BUt i guess there is nothing i can do about it.

Inside Jokes-..is it the elevator thats doing this?...I JUST REMEMBERED..who put that in my beer?...you do it then i will....yall are riding with us next time....IM TAKING THE CHAIR....pleeease Amanda....WHHHOOOAA,im just joking!..How was it watching your first porn?....OHhh YEA!....okok,i lied it was a sucker FISH....lol....okok i lied again it was a dolphin....COME LOOK AT THIS PIGEN!....What are they going to do dust it for prints?....Everyone pee at the same time...IM SORRY HOLY SHIT IM  SORRY MAN...oh my god...CLOSE THE DOOR...stop drop and role...HAHA...I thought it was carpet...

well if i think of more ill write..love you all-ash

Well its been awhile but im squeezing time in.Things are just well.. everywhere. i mean why does life have to be so difficult. Thats all i want to know.Me and greg are back together now....i hope things work out because i really care about him..Theres just something about him.But anyways works been awful...i just want to quit and im aloud to but i cant bring myself to do it. Tommarow i have to work from 9 am to close its going to be a LONG day. but hopefully i make some good money. OH for all of you that dont know..i cut my hair. YEA...i know. LOL i should be ashamed. but i think it looks really good so...oh well.Anyways nothings really been going on..Ive been having alot of fun though yesterday i went 4 wheelin all day and today i hung out with pabz, jeff, Ron, and Chris and then i went to my BOYfriends to visit with his little brothers...omg they were the cutest things EVER. i wanted to take them home with me. lol but i held back.I talked to my mom the other day...god i miss her and those kids. I honestly can not wait until im down there with them. IM going to take those kids everywhere...anywhere they want to go.ok ok im going to get off that subject before i get all mushy. Well anyways im supposed to be going to disney world here soon but we will see how that goes i might just stay home while they go. I dont know we will see.Oh yea im selling my car and taking over the ford until graduation and then my dads going to buy me a new car. But the fords really nice so its a good deal. BUt i am going to miss my car so much it is like the best car ever but i know ill get over it sooner or later.oh well thats really about all i am going to get to bed i have to wake up early for work. Love you all. Night

All i want to do is cry.I lay awake for hours everynight and think about Him. I hate myself for it..i want to be a strong person at this point, but im not. I cant stop this constant hurt inside of me i dont even want to be by myself for 5 mintues because i know ill start thinking about it. Tonight i took 2 pain killers just so that maybe i wouldnt think about it.Yea they wore off. I cant even explain this to anyone because i dont even understand it. i just wish it was over.