time to post again. not too much goin on right now other than spendin lots and lots of time with dee. i went back home with her this weekend and got to spend time with her family an some of her friends. her friends, courtney and kyle, were very kool. i had a good time with them ridin around in kyle's truck. i got to go muddin with them and dee on saturday night and we got stuck in a mud puddle!!! good times. i think we sat in that damn hole for a good 45 minutes before some of kyle's friends came to eventually push us out wiht a tractor after the chain they tried to pull us out wiht broke twice...yep good times indeed. then i got to see pictures from when dee went out west. very kool to see that stuff since i have never been there. i mean i went to colorado for winter trainin but its not like a really saw much of what was out there cause i was swimmin all the time. they were pretty good pictures and the scenery was very pretty. then i went to church with the rents and dee on sunday...yeah for those of u who know me...church...mm...and i went to sunday school as well...little too much for one day...did it for dee though. its all good, wasn't really all that bad, just lots of inner tension the entire time i was there. jsut bein back inside a church got my nerves goin. its all good. i mena mroe power to people who believe all that good stuff. its jsut not for me. neways off that topic. got to talk to my boy justin last nght for a good long time. whcih was most excellent. definately miss him a hellova lot. cant wait to see him over the x-ma holiday. oh and by the way my dad got me a car! not jsut a car but a FUCKIN CRAZY CAR!!!! 2003, black, ford mustang gt, grey interior, 5 speed, i mean DAMN. the rediculousness....seriously not goin to be able to ask for a present on ne occasion for the next couple of years. newho things with dee are absolutely wonderful. oh yeah y damn shoulder has beena ctin up this week for the first time in 2 years. ghetto joints...damn the rotator cuff! oh well been icin it and layin off the weights and takin pain killers so hopefully it will be all fixed soon enough. back to dee, sorry for the side rant typin as it comes though. the chaos keeps it slightly interestin, i think...not that it really matters....wow...A.D.D. moment there...well thigns with dee are wonderful as i said before and i have soemthing special planned as a very select few know...dont tell or i will gut ya...(cough* porter cough* cough*) well we shall see how it all unfolds and hopefully i will be able to pick up manual transmission drivin pretty quick so i can get it on in my new wheels. so, yeah lauren has beent alkin to me lately...and she has been nice...and thats jsut not right...all i have done for the past two years has been nice to her and done thigns for her and been there for her when she needed me to and cared for her mroe than i should cause i was hooked on her....and if she couldnt tell then she is stupid i even told her over the summer and all i have really gotten from her the last two years has been the cold shoulder....am i a little irratated she has decided to be nice now, yes. is it pissin dee off, yes. is that smart, no. i mean i still care for lauren and all that jazz and i will be there for her cause i feel obligated to right the many wrongs i have done to her and i dont know that my consious will ever let me forgive me for what i did to her but hopefully one day i will feel as though i am a good enough person to be able to frogive myself. for now i jsut cant. well off that cause im happy and dont need to be thinkin pesimistically...i'm goi to jet cause i think i'm goin to help dee study for her pledge exam....oooooo wait i'm movin. most excited. adam and i will be movin into a duplex and we will have a great place for luka, adams dog, german shepard, to play. its goin to be awesome. neway goin to go now. peace.