I haven't written in here for ages...and for good reason I suppose.  I'm pretty sure that no one reads this anymore, which is why i'm writing in here today.  I need to get some things off of my chest in a place where I won't be judged.

So yeah, things have been hard.  I experienced something that I never thought that I would.  I trusted someone...thought he was my friend...and paid the price for that dumb decision.  Moral of the story is: Don't trust anyone.  You'll get hurt...or used...or whatever the hell they feel like doing.  Then you get to feel the wonderful feeling of knowing that you're not worth a damn thing.  Good times, right?

Ugh, I'm sorry.  I've just been through hell and back these last couple of weeks.  I feel like I can't do anything right.  I screw up things almost constantly.  I try...it just doesn't seem to be enough.

So...umm...I really don't know what else to say.  I can't go into details...so I guess I'm just done.

yeah...nevermind...

I'm alive...in case anyone was wondering...

This summer has been crazy.  The highlights include:  living in my car for over a month, staying with a creep, trying pot for the first time, late nights with my best friend in the whole world, spending the night at a guys house for the first time, experiencing other things for the first time, turning 20, spending the week of my birthday hardly sober, watching the stars, getting in a bar fight, driving over 90 mph trying to catch a bus, crying over a boy after swearing I never would again, getting a puppy, living with some newlyweds, moving home, and getting my life semi put together.  So yeah, fun times.

If you knew me in high school...I'm not the same person.  Hell, if you knew in me my first two years of college...I'm not the same person anymore.  It's all good though.  Trust me, I'm fine.  It's all a part of the journey, right?

Why is it that the harder I try to just forget the past...the more impossible it feels to do so?

I want to move on...so why can't people just let me?  Why can't I let myself?  *sigh*

Anyway...two weeks of school...then finals...then living in my car for the summer.  Anything to avoid going home.  It will be interesting...to say the least. 

Currently Listening Rent (2005 Movie Soundtrack) see related

It has officially been a month since my last update...wow...that's a long time.

For any of you who are interested, I am still alive.  I doing pretty good actually.  I'm making the most of my college experience.  Classes are a pain in the ass and pretty much just get in the way (except for my abnormal psych class, which i love) but everything else about college is great.  One word to sum up my friends would have to be AMAZING.  I've pretty much spent 24/7 with Chris and Jeremy lately.  Chris and I work together and she lives just down the hall from me.  We spend so much time together that her roommate calls us life partners...hehe.  Jeremy is teaching me the guitar.  He's so good though...I'll never be that good.  But yeah, we hang out until 4 or 5 in the morning almost every night.  I really don't sleep anymore.  I catch little naps here and there throughout the day...and I think I'm functioning pretty well.

So yeah, I'm home this week for spring break.  I'm pretty much doing nothing but sleeping obscene amounts of time, watching Rent over and over again, watching movies on Lifetime, and talking to my friends on the phone.  Nice, huh?  I'm ready to get back to AU...only because I miss my friends though. 

So yeah, I demand that everyone leave me comments.  My last few posts have been majorly lacking in the love.  My only posts that get responce on the ones with pictures!  haha...so yeah, here's a few pics.

This is what happens when you spash someone with water on the way back from dinner.  Full out mud fight!!  Yeah, fun times with my Chris.

My new hair color...yeah, I felt like being a little crazy. 

This is probably about 4 am @ our favorite latenight hangout...IHOP!!

Currently Listening Rent (2005 Movie Soundtrack) see related