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PunkManager
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Name: Aimee
Birthday: 8/18/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: God, Red Sox, pretty much every aspect of music, most movies, Refuge, getting care packages(especially when there's food in them! *cough* hint hint *cough*), Red Sox winning the World Series, pictures(more looking at them than taking them, but taking them is fun too)
Expertise: I don't know that I'm an "expert" at anything, but I'm rather knowledgeable in the following things: Red Sox, some aspects of music, some bands, "bubbly" and it's oringination, most electronics(if I don't know how to work it yet, chances are i will in 5-10 minutes of using it), being sick(I've come to be quite good at this), and I'm sure there's more but I can't think of anything else right now.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
5/12/2004
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| 728or 171 (haha). Ah, it's been 728 days since I joined xanga, which is a total lie. That's just how long I've had this one. The actual time that I have been a xanga member is...*looks up first xanga* ... 1158 days. Dang. It kind of depresses me looking back at some of my old posts and at the same time some of them make me laugh really hard and some just bring back some great memories. The ones that depress me are the ones in which I'm like "I like so and so, he's so great, blah blah blah, I'm being a dumb girl!" I always kind of regret those posts because I look back at them now and think, "Wow, I really was so dumb back in the day" or "What on earth was I thinking when I liked that guy!?" Don't get me wrong, I still have those moments and I'm pretty sure that because I am, in fact, a girl I will always have those moments, but I like to think that now I have at least gotten better about not posting stuff like that in a blog where the whole world can read it. I don't know, maybe I'm just lying to myself.
I currently find myself wondering two things: (1) what does any of what I just wrote have to do with anything, and (2) why am I still awake(it's currently 2:15am). My answer to the first is, I don't know. My answer to the second is, I have a lot on my mind and need to try to get it out before I try to go to sleep. The hard part is that I don't feel like I can really put any of it into a public blog which, in a sense, makes this rather worthless. At the same time, though, it seems that just putting down a whole bunch of nonsense is helping me feel better. Then again, it could also be the part where I prayed that God would take control over all this stuff before I started writing and He is taking control, cause that's part of what He does for us.
I've been really bad lately about giving things over to God. I always do this, too. I'll be really good about it and then all of sudden I just stop and think "Hey, I can handle this on my own!" I really should start telling myself to shut up and stop being dumb cause let's face it, I can't. The problem is, I hate feeling helpless and not in control (I'm sure no one particularly enjoys this feeling) and that's how I feel right now. I'm sure everyone that knows me (especially from here in Nashville) is sick of hearing this by now, but I really think that a trip to New Hampshire would help me so much.
I hate emotional roller coasters. I especially hate the ones that you just kinda get stuck on and can't figure out how to get off of. For instance, over the past two weeks I have had so many drastic ups and downs and it's really driving me crazy now. I've gone from ultra depressed to the point where I pretty much had an emotional break down at work to feeling happier than I have in... probably well over a year. Then for a while I was somewhere in the middle and now I'm not even sure anymore. I know full well that the only and best thing I can do is to hand it all over to God and now that fact is just kinda smacking me the face. It's hard though. Very hard. I'm frustrated and sad and happy all at the same time.
I guess what it all boils down to is that I need prayer. I've been going crazy lately and I'm finally getting to the point where I realize that I can't do it on my own. I'm trying to give it all to God but for some reason this time it's harder than any other time, so if you think about, keep me in your prayers. I thank you all in advance, and maybe now I'll be able to sleep.
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| 11:15
New xanga. Forget this one. Things are different now....
Check out this craziness
No more updates on this sucker... if you wanna know what's going on, you gotta check the new xanga... TheseTearsFade!
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| 9:54pm
Update-age is happening so pay close attention! I might add that this
is happening at a decent hour. I am currently watching the Red
Sox/Orioles game(Sox are winning 5-1 in the to of the 8th... WOOT!)
Ortiz just got a double. Enough play-by-play. Concerning the Red Sox...
I have intent to go to a game in August and I am soooo excited. I found
4 tix together, good(not quite great) seats for a pretty good price. I
can't wait. Soul Fest is drawing ever closer and I am thoroughly
psyched about that as well. Walmart is going pretty good. Keep on
keeping on, I guess. Finally saw Ryan, for those of you who care.
Christa is up for the rest of the summer and that's pretty sweet. I
have intent to have Red Sox party next week for one of the Red
Sox/Yankee games. I'm not sure which day yet. I'm open to
suggestions.... let me know if you're interested... the more the
merrier. Hah, the more the less room, but still merrier. I think I'm
going to go make a bag of popcorn and finish the game... then go to bed
cause I'm sleepy and have to work 10-7 tomorrow, then I'm chillin with
Christa and possily some other ppl. Thus, I'm out like a broken
lightbulb.... whatever... later
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| 12:21am
Why is it that the majority of blog posting happens late at night like,
say, at 12:21am? I don't understand. I suppose it's because that's the
only time people have to post. Ok, quick update before bed. I feel
old... I go to bed early now. Whatever. Work is going good. Well, as
good as working at Walmart can be. Today was majorly boring. Oh well,
life goes on.
I've been in a wierd mood lately. I miss all my friends from school. At
the same time I don't want to leave NH. Maybe it would be better
if I'd actually seen all the people I wanted to by now. From
school I miss, well, everyone, but in particular people like Aaron,
Chris, Tetra... them people, the ones I didn't hang out with much last
semester. From here I miss Dustin and Ryan, ya know, the ones I haven't
seen in months, or even close to a year *cough*Dustin*cough*. It's
tough, I consider people like those mentioned really good friends,
especially Tetra and Ryan(I know them best), and I won't see some till
the end of August and others until who knows when! It's almost as hard
to explain as it is not seeing them. It sucks. At this point in time I
would just be happy if I actually got to see Ryan and, uh, I dunno,
hang out with him. Anyway, I need to get to bed and sleep. Update
later.
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| 11:06pm
I FINALLY got my internet up and running! That is why I haven't been
online at all since I left Belmont. My apartment is only hooked
up to the wireless from the house so I've been dependant on that, but
as some of you may know, my wirless hasn't been working since Christmas
time. Anyway, I got fixed. Hooray! Now I can actually communicate with
people... what a concept. I'll update all this stuff in due time...
Right now I'm going to bed cause I'm freaking tired and I have to work
tomorrow... working in lawn/garden 40 hrs/wk is kinda tough... or at
least tiring...time to slee...zzzzzzzzzzzzz
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"Hey let's hear some chatter out there!"
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...dnim ym fo sgnikrow renni eht ot emocleW
