QueenSpartina's Xanga

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Wed, 28 Nov 2007 19:06:24 GMT

Ok yeah so it's been forever since I've done this and no one is reading but I feel I need to be nice to my site and write something.

So here it is.

It's cold.

I wish I was in Innisbrook.

But I feel so relaxed since I came back. On my first day back to school a child, let's call him Satan to protect his identity...., was angry because I told him to clean up and he dug his fingers into my arm. Was I angry? Oh no, I took his fingers off and showed him my arm where the red patches he made were already dissapearing and I said "See? All that yelling and effort to hurt me and you didn't even leave a mark! So why don't you just clean up?"

I'm not usually this mature....today a kid screamed at me to leave him alone and I said "Not until you stop screaming at me." but everytime I spoke he yelled "LEAVE ME ALONE!" so it became a game, really. He did stop sceaming. and I did leave him alone. Until he threw a train at a kid's head.

Santa's job is really not as hard as we think. He must be able to skip right over thousands of homes filled with naughty children.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Sat, 10 Feb 2007 10:02:57 GMT

HERE IT IS! HERE IT IS! It's not a great picture but I had to sneak up on it as my old boss still lives there and I didn't want her to think I was stalking her...

Oh I can't wait to decorate it - I was in my mom's basement the other day and I felt like one of those TV shows where they find random stuff and turn it into a dining room table. I found an old door and I'm going to try and make it into a headboard for my bed...well, I had the idea - Jim will make it into the headboard!

And I already see myself staining an old bookcase and cleaning an old cabnet - what fun!

I Just hope we can get the cat over there w/o her freaking out on us...I really do lie in bed at 4am and think about that - and all the other wonderful and amazing things that are happening!!

FINALLY!!!!

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Wed, 07 Feb 2007 17:07:23 GMT

Okay so for those of you who may not know and it's probably not you because not too many people actually read this, BUT - Bear and I are moving into a house! I have never lived in a house that was mine before. The last house I lived in was 46 Webb and that house belongs to everyone. Since then it's been apartments if you can even call it that. I feel guilty living in the place I live in now because it used to be a beautiful old house and someone came in and raped it of all it beauty and made it into three apartments. They just forgot to add soundproofing - and insulation. And separate water pressure for each apartment. It should have just been left alone.

Like the place I am about to move into - it was left alone and it is perfect - it has two stories and just can't wait to run up and down the stairs! It has two bedrooms and Bear wants the second bedroom to house all his toys which I am fine with because I can Shut The Door. But I told him that the toys can only live there until I pop out a baby. He looked at me like I had four heads. I don't think he believes me when I say I'm a girl and I can have a baby. Understandable, as I have never done it before. But I'm pretty sure it's possible. And the baby will have a window overlooking the park cady corner to our house.

I have a kitchen that is big enough not only to fit two people but to fit a table. I can finally unpack all of my shower gifts!! Bear will have a small office in the back and off of that is something the reminds me of a smaller version of a room on Hawkins Road where I grew up - it was the TV room then it will be the TV room now. The front of the house has a tiny room that can only be one thing - my library. It has three windows that overlook the street and the park and the porch and it will have me, my books, my desk, my computer and my Matisse Painting, which, no matter where I've gone in my life, I have had in sight distance. And then the part where you all come in - the porch!!!

It starts at the front door and wraps around to the back. It gets bigger on the side - big enough for a large table and chair and a hammock which comes with the house!!

We have a back yard.

I feel like my head is going to pop I am so excited. Is this really happening? I feel like it may not but I must keep going through the motions - make the world feel like it is! Place - it's so important. createing a home - creating sacred space.

March 1st can't come fast enough. It will be perfect because by summer, I will be serving Margaritas and Sangria (depending on the day) on my porch and you are all invited!

Monday, December 11, 2006

Mon, 11 Dec 2006 21:15:17 GMT

I know that some of us (including myself) have not been feeling the holiday spirit so I made up a little questionnaire to stir that spirt a bit!

1) What is one gift you remember as being the best christmas present ever?

The VCR was pretty life changing. But going to see Annie is still one of my favorite memories!

2) When you think "Christmas Day" what room do you picture?

The living room on Hawkins Road in Stoney Brook where I grew up

3) Did you go to church on christmas eve? If so, what is one memory you have?

I remember Mom reading "The Gift of the Magi" and her voice giving out halfway through the story. Sorry, but that's it. And Candles - and my brother Jim trying to spill wax on my hand.

4) Do you remember the first christmas present you ever gave to someone? What was it and what did you give?

I remember buying a smurf toy for my sister Tracy. I was probably six or seven. I remember buying it at the mall and mom helping me count out money for it! I think I may have taken it back later on.

5) Do you remember a white christmas? Where and when?

Staten Island - that may have been the same year Ryan was born.

6) Favorite Christmas Song:

I like to sing "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!" but I don't know all the words. I also like White Christmas.

7) Favorite Christmas Story: "Gift of the Magi." There ya go mom.

8) Do you remember going to see santa?

No. Well, I think my memories are from movies of other people going to see santa.

9) When did you stop believing in santa?

Hm?

10) Favorite Christmas Tradition:

Decorating the tree. And Finding Andi's paper chain she made when she was five (And the other ornaments but that one only goes to show we support my sisters OCD)

11) If you could spend christmas anywhere in the world with anyone where would it be and with whom?

I'm happy with everyone in Ocean Grove (But Disney is fun too!!!)

Yeah I stole it too

Fri, 10 Nov 2006 13:35:07 GMT

Probably a lot I should be doing but it's siesta time here at la escuela, so here I go:

1.You and Jesus go out to dinner - who pays?
Jesus. If doesn't offer then he's a fraud.

2. You suddenly have to flee the country and adopt an alias. What is it?
Oh! what did I do? I think I'd be Henrietta Hawkins.

3. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently?
Texas. No one likes Texas.

4. You wake up as the opposite gender - what's the one thing you wanna try?
Peeing while stading up - and in public!

5. Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?
Han Solo - he's my hottie.

6. Toy you always wanted but never got as a child?
I don't know. I was pretty spoiled. It was proably something that mom and dad thought was demonic.

7. Top three celebrities you wanna do.
Yeah, I don't do people. But if Brad Pitt asked for a kiss I may ahve fun telling him no. And if Angelina Jolie asked me to be a lesbian for a day I'd think about it. And my Will Smith crush may sneak in but he's way too nice for that.

8. What's an automatic deal breaker in a potential significant other?
Republican and Yankee Fan - Oh wait....

9. What is the last movie you saw that actually scared you?
The shining. I haven't seen anything that really scared me as much as that movie did.

10. Stupidest thing you've ever said out loud?
Not enough space for them all - I agree with Ryan

11. You're sentenced to death and it's the morning of your execution, what do you want to eat?
Pizza from Italy, Tacos from Mexico, Cheese from France, Beer from Prauge, Wine from Spain - if it takes them awhile to get it all I'll live longer!!!

12. What's something that most people do that you've never done?
type w/o looking at the keyboard

13. Before you die you want to go to...?
China - and Japan. And someplace with umbrella's in drinks.

14. Something you'd really like to do but probably won't ever be able to do?
type w/o looking at the keyboard

15. A wild animal you'd like to have as a pet?
A nice bear

16. A drug you'll never try?
Coke. I have enough problems with my nose.

17. If you were an animal what would you be?
A sloth - did you know they sleep all day?

18. If you had to marry someone you knew at the age of 12 who would it be?
Ricky Schroder. I knew him (kinda)

19. What's something a lot of people don't know about you?
I'm married to a republican (It shocks me too)

20. First celebrity crush?
Han Solo

21. What's a weapon to suit your personality, habits and abilities?
A gun - it's quick and required little to no thought

23. Favorite breakfast bread style (pancakes, waffles, toast etc...)?
Bagels....and pancakes...and sausage!

24. Worst way to die?
starving to death - I almost did once

25. What's the grossest injury you've ever seen?
Bear sliced his foot on a boat propellor. I almost fainted.

26. The worst injury you've ever had?
I had to have stitches when I was little. that's it.

27. Favorite thing about Thanksgiving?
Mashed Potatoes and Pumpkin Pie. - and sweet potaotes!!!

28. Sport you hate the most?
cheerleading. they say it's a sport.

29. What state in the US do you want to visit?
Hawaii

30. What's something you think would be sweet to know everything about?
Finances

31. Favorite Actor/Actress?
Lots of them.

32. What makes an awesome party?
Chris Wells

33. What is your material obsession?
Bags

34. What's something most would consider an insult but you enjoy having said about you?
I'm psycho.

35. Favorite kind of dog?
Pugs rule

36. Favorite carnival food (everyone has one)?
Funnel Cake. - oh yeah Ry!

37. Morning or night person?
Afternoon

38. Worst drunken/drugged up habit?
I get really personal when I get drunk. It's not so good.

39. Weirdest ebay purchase?
I don't, but I thought the guy who sold his wife was weird.

40. Favorite food to eat when you're wasted?
Isn't everything good? I like soup when I'm drunk.

41. Its Saturday at 3am where are you?
Alseep. Hard core asleep.

42. Who's your favorite friend to go out with?
Oh Nikki your so fine your so fine you blow you mind.

43.Worst job you've ever had?
Working at this upscale coffee shop in PA. I lasted two days

44. What's something your friends make fun of you for?
I'm a slob

45. Favorite cereal?
Honey Nut Cheerios

46. Book you could read repeatedly?
East of Eden

47. What's the meanest thing you've ever done?
I'd rather not talk about it

48. If you were drafted into a war, would you survive?
no. no I'd die.

someplace else

Wed, 08 Nov 2006 20:40:46 GMT

So now It's back to normal and I'm longing for it. No longer a bride, back to being a person. I long for travel, books, walking, resting, turning off the TV and hanging out with friends. Back to life again. I have found that you can listen to the BBC Radio 1 on-line and I love listening to radio that is actually happening in England right now. I am. Right now.

I am writing again and I am still reading about poor Henry.

Yet, I feel like it's not time to settle. Not quite. There are still a lot of changes that are going to come my way. Work, family, kids, homes - but right now, none of that is happening and I am enjoying simply being me.

It's a nice place to be, before it all starts rolling again.

I did try to upload some of the pix my photographer gave me of my wedding but no such luck.. I will keep trying

The party is over....

Mon, 18 Sep 2006 22:43:53 GMT

But the fun has just begun! I can't begin to express how absolutely perfect everything went. When I think about all the preparation that went into this wedding I understand why I feel so tired now - but when I think back on how it all came together - I am in awe. As I was walking down the aisle I started to cry because it was happening - this moment I had imagined in my head for so long!!! Nothing- no amount of planning! - can prepare you for that overwhelming feeling of walking down the aisle - and to see my man standing there looking so great! And everyone was so great - even in my occasional (???) bridezilla moments - we all made it through!

Today, I am no longer Jenny Twerell - but I am not yet Jennifer Bagdanov! So I am here, in Limbo as Bear said - as Queen Spartina! I have never felt so relaxed - happy - lucky!!! I can't wait to see all the pictures!!!1

Happy Birthday to the Bride!

Wed, 05 Jul 2006 18:14:36 GMT

Invitations are out! All together I have invited about 130 people, and I know most of them. AND - today I got my first RSVP card - from a five year old! Kids are just the best.

But really all I want to do is go on vacation. If you have never been to Seaside Heights New Jersey you absolutely must. The first time I went it hit me that oh yeah! I'm on the Jersey Shore! I must have seen a movie some time about a shore beach tow and the boardwalk when I was a kid - Lost Boys? Maybe it was that - and it reminds me of that ! It is the perfect Jersey boardwalk - without the vampires (I guess...). And do it quick - I heard yesterday that they want to tear down the rides on the pier and build condos. Freakin' New Jersey - whay do people need so many places to live????

And along with that vacation I get to experience turning (gasp!) 31 years old. it just sounds really ...old. I see it in me now too - The old Gray Mare just ain't what she used to be...

So wedding makes it's move into the two and a half month countdown. From here on out I feel it's pretty much out of my hands - people have to respond - others have to thrown parities - many have to get excited. I am - I'm ready for it to happen tomorrow!!

Crossing the pond

Wed, 07 Jun 2006 21:17:46 GMT

So I just got back a few days ago from an amazing trip to England. Everyday was filled with new information, beautiful sights, long hours of reading, hearing new stories and rediscovering old friends. I had planned on spending my trip reading through a Jane Austen novel I had never read - but as soon as I touched down in London was drawn back to an old favorite, Virginia Woolf. In all I have read I have never come across anyone who could live in a moment and express the beauty of every second like she could. And she lives on today, so relevant to this time - to anytime! Reading her at the start of this trip was just what I needed - a chance to enjoy ever last minute. To be alive in all that was happening all around me , all the time. I was exhausted - I still am! But I feel so alive and refreshed. Things that used to be such a huge weight like money, my job, this wedding, - life! have become so small - I say I don't care but I mean it in the best possible way. I finally care less. My cares are directed towards things that mean more - like my future, this moment and all I am grteful for and love so much.

I came home to this tiny town and felt overwhelmed and so far away from all that I had come to love so much. but then I reached into my bag and pulled out my Virginia Woolf book I bought and read the short story "Haunted House" which brought to life the real treasure "the light within the heart!" and as I finished my story my love pulled up outside and I knew at once that all I had found to love in England had come with me - because it was here "within my heart" all along!

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Sun, 14 May 2006 12:08:52 GMT

Now that I am done with school I feel my brain slowly starting to melt. Not that I feel that I am becoming dumb again - only that I am waking up to the reality outside of constant thinking, papers, "Right" answers and the ever present idea that you are doing something just to be done. I feel I had my first shock of reality the other night when I was watching "American Idol." Ok.ok.ok.ok - yes - I watch it. Yes, I enjoy it - no, I don't vote. I feel I come to the great hall of music to simply be entertained. But I don't vote - I merely watch to see what happens. But when Chris got voted off - I felt it. Hard. I felt like I would cry. Over what? This kid who is super talented and very cute who has hung out with me in my living room every Tuesday and Wednesday - who has become a rock star and is a household name - am I crying for him? No - I was crying for me. This was my outlet - the way I would allow my brain to melt away the years of tortuous thinking it has had to do. But it's people lives!!! Not just entertainment - and I had become involved in someone's life and I will never meet them (Unless I invite him to the wedding....hmmmm). It took a few days for that to wear off (it's always good to talk to people who are in actual morning over Chris where as I was just sad) and now I hear that the band Fuel has offered him the position of lead singer in the band and he has to "think about it." Now I am sick of Chris. We'll see how long this big-fish-in-a-little-pond act fly's. I'm looking forward to his brain melting too.

I have also found somene else I want to invite to the wedding. David Sedaris. I have always known about him through Tracy but recently she has passed on her old i-pod to me and it has all her old stuff in it. As I have not figured out how to download my own things into i I have been listening to hers. I came across David Sedaris, live at Carnegie Hall, the other day as I was working out. Perfect, I though - I will burn some calories and listen to funny man. Note to self - it is close to impossible to lift a thirty pound weight while laughing your ass off. People must have thought I was crazy - sweat running down my face mixing with the tears of laughter as I move on my machines. But - it was a great abs work out and I loved it. I have to get more of it.

So new list of people I don;t really know who will be invited to me wedding :

1) David Palmer

2) Dave Ghrol

3) Cameron Diaz

4) Donald Trump

5) Luke Skywalker

6) Han Solo

7) Princess Leah

8) Elizabeth Taylor (She's got this whole wedding thing down by now)

9) Chris Daughtry (?)

10) Howie Mandel (I just want him to marry us - he can turn to Bear and say "Deal? or no deal" then bear will say "Deal" then he'll turn to me and say "Jenny - Deal, or no deal?" and then we'll be married!)

11) Motley Crue (Bear wanted to add Vince - I said oh yeah and Tommy Lee - so we decided to invite them all. We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings)

12) Miss Piggy

I feel like I am forgetting people from the last time - I'll add them later.