So yesterday I turned 17...and not much is different. I think 17 is probably one of the strangest birthdays because it is right after the big 1 6 and right before the adulthood of 18.
Not much is really going on at all. I am still working. I am still hanging out with Sara and Danielle and Kellie and her hot boyfriend Cameron--who I have discovered is very straight, guess my gay-dar needs a check-up.
Life is pretty boring, but still good. I am starting to feel the heat on what I am going to do after next year--college or a year off, stay home or move away, general studies or declared major. But it is way too soon to be that concerned about it.
There is one thing missing in my life right now: young love. But, I don't think I can really handle it right now anyway and why should I try to force something that just isn't meant to be right now? But then agian I may just be too picky. Maybe I'm not even gay anymore; maybe all my lack of affection has turned me into an a-sexual freak. It seems like the only guys I am attracted to are the ones that I would never have a chance with. Like this kid Matt, who is extremly handsome and awesome to talk to, but is sadly 24, making a relationship between us illegal--not that he would even want to date a 17 year old. And Cameron, who is now obviously straight. And this other guy Mike, who is probably more into women than Ron Jeremy, but somehow I am convinced that he will come up and confess his burning love to me. And it isn't like there aren't guys out there who like me, but I am never attracked to those guys. Maybe I am too analytical or maybe I just want everything to work itself out without me doing anything to make it happen. But I don't want to force anything--I feel like love just happens on its own and doesn't need a navigater. Ha, That sentence doesn't even make sence to me, I need to stop BSing.
But if guy problems are the worst issues, than I've got it pretty good. Hope everyone else the best.-Josh
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