Howdy,

   So today is going to be totally of topic of everything I normally do. I have been given a challenge, by Crystal, of finding 10 words that start with letter "W", and explain there meaning to me.

1.) Worship: The driving force of a Christians life. It should be present in everything we do, and I strive to make it part of everything I do.

2.) Willing: Willingness to help people is a staple in my life.

3.) Wealth: The root of all evil when it comes to the temporal form. The wealth that I share in Christ, is something that can not be taken away from me.

4.) War: Something occuring every second of every day in my own heart.

5.) Words: A word spoken can never be taken back, it makes a lasting imprint in whoever it is that you speak to. So be careful about what you say, and to whom you say it.

6.) Weight: The downfall of society. Society has this norm of what people should look like, and any sort of weight is considered disgusting.

7.) Welcome: All man is welcome to come talk to me. Christ welcomed me into His house with open arms.

8.) Why: A necessary question for someone to ask to define what it is that they truly believe. To sit back and take something as fact without doing their own research, leaves a person open to ignorance.

9.) WGACA!: One of my greatest highschool memories. What Goes Around Comes Around. I miss coach Connoly

10.) Women: The greatest of all creations. A group of people to be treated with the greatest of respect.

   Well guys that is all I got for today. If you drop me a line, and ask to be challenged as well, I think I'd be able to give you a letter.

God Bless,

~Peace~

Howdy,

   Well my friends it seems that is time for me to give an update. I have recently been chatised for my lack of updating. Well life is going smoothly, well kind of. I had a research paper due today, and tomorrow I will have a critical response due. Other then that, life is amazing. Emily called me yesterday, we talked for ten minutes or so, but I am going to get to meet her in person for the first time ever the week I get home. For those of you who do not know, she is a friend of mine from UMHB. My highschool football coach's wife introduced us, awkwardly, through an e-mail. Since that time we have just been sharing life's troubles, and His glory with eachother. She is possibly the most amazing woman of God I have ever met.

   Anyway, I am just really excited about the summer. I can't wait to get back to civilization again, I don't know how much I am going to like not being able to see stars, smelling smoke, and breathing smog, but it will be good to get home and see my friends again. Now I am definitely going to miss a bunch of my HPU peeps too. All them Yayhoos, I don't know how I am going to get by without playing basketball everynight. Then there are people like John Ryan, J-Willy, and Kelly Doolittle, I am going to miss some of our great conversations. Then Bobby... well I am just going to miss Bobby period. Austin and Travis, to of the most amazing men I know. Then there's the softball girls, Burley, Pink, and Bollich, that I am going to miss joking around with and just haning out with. Haha, and making fun of Allison every chance I get. Wow, I didn't realize how many people have came so close to me this school year. I really will miss all of you this summer. If anyone heads towards Galveston this summer, let me know, you'll have to pass me to get there.

   Well my friends, unfortunately, homework is necessary, so I must get to it. God Bless.

~Peace~

Howdy,

   My dear friends, do I have things to share with you. Do you believe things, that is life, can change in but a single instant of life? I was not sure of that answer myself until this past week. I want to take a second and recognize the complete and total trancendence of God! Anyway, I have been talking to a friend of mine this week and just helping him with his problems. God then layed it on my heart that what I was saying really applied to me as well, and I decided that I needed to listen to my own advice.

   The greatest of my realizations involved the fact that I needed to be able to live with myself how I am now, before I can ever bring another human being into my life. I realized that before my two years of fasting from dating was up, I could live a normal life without anyone else, and I loved life. As soon as that date that I had set up between me and God arrived, life began going down hill. I needed someone in my life, I had to have it, and it upset me that God did not drop her into my lap. I now realize that I do not need anyone, and I do not want to have to need anyone. I do not want to "want someone because I need them," I want to "need someone because I want them." Talk about a come to Jesus meeting. God definitely does let you know when you are getting away from His will; He will slap you down hardcore. I said in this same conversation, somethin I had been saying for a long time, but just now has hit home. If it were up to me, I would never date again. I would just marry my best friend. Wishful thinking I know, but in the words of one of my dear friends, "Husband and wife are just that, best friends."(Paraphrased)

   Well my friends life is good, and I am praying it stays like this for some time. You all mean the world to me. May God bless you in everything you do.

Until He comes,

~Peace~

Howdy,

   Well ladies and gents, it has been another one of those nights. I layed down about four hours ago, and was in no way shape or form tired. So I put on a movie hoping it would lul me to sleep like they do most of the time this late. Nope, I guess it was wishful thinking. I have no earthly idea what has been up lately. My mind is all over the place. One minute I think about all the things that are going so well, and in the very next instant I am contemplating why my life is so screwed up. I mean really, I have amazing friends, that I see, talk, and goof around with every day. I have a God who loves me no matter how bad I screw up and works in me in ways that are totally random most of the time, or at least random to me.

   This weekend has not really been all that great. I think this weekend was the first weekend I did not spend the holidays with my family... that is not even that bad, but this is the first holiday I have spent alone. That kind of hits home, I am not a kid anymore... and it does not look good for me as an adult either. I have not really eaten this weekend, not because I was not hungry, or that I could not afford to, I just did not want to get off my lazy butt and walk to get something to eat, because it takes to long. Oh yeah, my bike is missing. If I truly cared enough I could have always asked Street to give me a ride to Wal-Mart to get something to eat. I try to convince myself that I did not eat because I had a cell phone payment due this week, even though my parents would have given me some money to take care of it. That is another thing, I cannot even find a job for myself, so my parents do not have to pay for everything.

   Going back to my last post, I have tried my hardest not to think about a girl for two years, now I am free to date, and it is suffocating. At least when I swore it off I could just set aside any sort of feelings as something aside from what I was supposed to be doing. Now it just jumps up and bites me in the butt. It seems around every corner something comes up, and theres another serpant, waiting to nip me in the bud again. I guess the question I should be asking, is it a Serpant or something Higher. Who knows? Some part of me wishes it were a serpant, so I could crush it. It has come to a point in my life where I want God to make an absolute sign. Something that I could not possibly doubt, but he could also expect me to seek what it is he wants for me. I am so torn. 

   For the past month I have had dreamless nights. At least no dreams that I could remember. The past two nights, I have had dreams. The dreams always involve the same people, in similar situations. Not anything bad or provocative, but still out of the ordinary. I wish I could understand my subconcious, but I guess there are parts of us we were never meant to understand. There are only a handful of dreams I have ever remembered in my life days after having them, this will probably be one of those.

   Crap, why must life, be so complicated. I have said many of times, life is not complicated, life is simple, but we make it complicated, well guess what, I am making my life extremely complicated. It is as if I were walking through a mine field in snow shoes blindfolded. Every step that I make, at times seems it may have been a mistake. If nothing blows up I get to make another one, if I trigger something... well I am screwed.

   Well I am not going to bore you guys anylonger with my personal problems. I love you all! God Bless!

~Peace~

Howdy,

   Well things have been decent recently. A lot of things I am just really confused about right now, I know God will deliver in His time, but so often I wish my time came into play. Recently I have been realizing that time is a factor in life. I have been thinking a lot about my future family, my kids in particular. I do not want to be this old geezer dad who cannot go out and play catch with his kids, or this dad that is so far removed from the culture he cannot understand why his kids do what they do. I have no earthly idea why this is even crossing my mind, but the fact is, that it is. Along with my kids I have been thinking progressively more about my wife. It is one of those things, I have no idea who she is, or when God will present her, or will I even recognize her when he does? I can see now why CS Lewis says that sin does not lie in the past or in the present as much as it does in the future. I am not doubting God and God's Will. I mean look at Abraham...

   On top of this, my "No Date Fast" expired last month, and I have no clue what that really meant. Part of me wants to get back into the game hardcore, another part of me says, "Just wait." It is like one of those cartoons with the little angel on one shoulder and the demon on the other; to pile the crap up even higher, every time I think about dating, I think about how much I screwed up in my last serious relationship, and I think that I do not deserve to date. I hate how I make life so friggin complicated. I mean honestly it is simple, You're Born, You worship God in everything you do, Pay taxes, and "Die". That all there is everything else is just added gifts from Above. Ha! I wish I could honestly make myself accept that.

   So that was my little rant. Oh almost forgot, I busted my mouth open playing basketball. I hope you all are having an amazing day, and may God rain his blessings down upon you.

~Peace~