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| Ok I’ve seen this bulletin posted and re-posted for a few days now and it’s really starting to get on my nerves:
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Rules to Enter Texas:
1. Pull your droopy pants up! You look like an idiot.
2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road." I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. They are cattle & oil wells. They smell like shit to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-20 and I-10 go east and west, I-35 goes north and south. Pick one.
4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 cotton strippers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.
5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of doves are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.
7. Yeah, we eat catfish & crawfish. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.
8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.
9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak, or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and Picante Sauce! Oh, yeah....We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat....It AIN'T REAL CHILI!! Chili was born and bred in San Antonio....and real chili never met a tomato!
12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.
14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it spooks the fish.
15. Colleges? Try Texas Tech, Texas A&M, University of Texas, Sam Houston State University or Lamar University. They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Texas," If you do, you will get whipped by the best.
17. Always remember what our great governor Sam Houston once said:
"Texas can make it without the United States, but the United States can't make it without Texas!"
Texas is the greatest state ever!! If you are from Texas you are bad, you are one bad hombre!!! If you do not repost this in 10 min. you are not a true Texan!!!!!!
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Maybe I’m not a "true Texan" but if being that means that I have to whoop hoot n holler at the sight of a pick up truck with 10 flags 12 yellow ribbons, 3 Texas Trophy Hunters club stickers and a gun rack in the back...then count me out.
If I drive a Lexus and eat caviar...maybe just maybe, that makes me classier than those golly darn shotgun totin cottin pickin "friendly Texans" (which in my past experience I have NOT found to be true, unless friendly means closed minded and you wont be MY friend unless i too am a conservative-God fearing-pro-lifing-country music lovin-truck drivin-tobacco chewin-Bush lickin-dirt road drivin-red meat eatin-cowboy hat wearin-boot scootin boogyin-yeehawin redneck like you).
Id have to say that I'm tired of this "Texan" image being the standard that the world holds all Texans to...I went to NY and some lady asked me with a completely straight face if I RIDE A COW TO SCHOOL. Granted this is an extreme example but it happens all the time, every time a TV show like Queer Eye or Room Raiders come to Texas, no matter where they go even if its somewhere like Dallas or Houston, they have to get in the shots of cows and spurs...
Of COURSE there are exceptions to this, there are great small town Texans out there that I love to death, but in general I’m really tired of being lumped into this group and I’m REALLY tired of being treated like I wasn’t born and raised here, which I was...I’ve never lived any where else in my life.
So YOU get over it, I eat salad, I will always drive a car that gets great gas mileage, I will never blindly support anything, I will always strive for intellect and have my own opinion. So just because I don’t have a flag and a huge W on the ass of my car, doesn’t mean I’m not a good Texan or American, I love living here and I’m grateful as hell… just don’t expect me to agree and buy into this good ole’ Texan ideal, its time that the other kinds of Texans start getting a little respect around here…just as you demand for yourselves. | | |
| sadly, some of my friends that i thought id have forever...are dissipating.
i knew it was guna happen, so many older people told me it would but somehow i thought MY friends would be diffrent, and that i could do it. keep in touch, yet i find that so many of my 'true friends' dont much give a flyin flip about hangin out with me anymore. and whats sad is im not quite sure why. i didnt do anything...
?
oh well i guess thats life, and i could bet most of you reading this havnt seen me in months, altho weve been in the same vacinity many many times. | | |
| Redneck--
[] Do you have a couch in your front yard or porch?
[] Do you drive a four-wheeler?
[] Do you ride four-wheelers?
[] Do you like to get dirty?
[X] Do you like country music?
[] Do you have a broken car in your back yard? (in the back driveway)
[] Do you own a cowboy hat?
[] Do you live on more then 2 acres?
[] Do you have more then 4 different animals at your home?
Total X:1
-Goth--
[X] Do you wear black eyeliner?
[] Is most of your clothing dark?
[] Do you think about death often?
[] Do you want to die?
[] Are you a social outcast?
[] Are you pale?
[] Do you like Hot Topic?
[X] Do you enjoy Tim burton movies?
[]Are you mean?
Total X: 2
--Punk--
[] Can you skateboard
[ ] Do you wear Vans?
[X]Do you do stupid stuff with your friends?
[]Have you gotten in trouble with the Cops?
[] Do you watch the x-games?
[X] Do you have any piercings?
[] Do you like/wear mohawks?
[]Do you wear Band T-shirts
[] Have you called someone a poser recently?
Total X:2
--Prep--
[X] Do you say the word "like"?
[] Do you shop at Polo/Lacoste?
[] Do you pop the collar?
[] Do the people in Hot topic scare you?
[] Is the only nerd u like Seth Cohen?
[X] Do you watch Real World?
[] Do you like jack johnson and jimmy buffet?
[] Do you want/have a labrador?
[X] Do you have a letter jacket
Total X: 3
--Hippie--
[X] is your hair long (not shaggy, but long)?
[] Do you own a tie-dye shirt?
[] Do You want to save the animals?
[] Do you think war is unnecessary?
[] Do you like trippy music?
[] Have you ever participated in a protest?
[] Have you ever been overcome with a desire to hug a tree?
[] Is meat murder?
[] Is pot an herb from God?
Total X: 1
--Gangster--
[] Do you act ghetto?
[] Do you wear do-rags?
[X] Do you like hip-hop?
[] Was Tupac truly the greatest rapper in the world?
[] Do you believe he's alive?
[] Do you like afros?
[X] Have you ever said "Fo Shizzle"?
[X] Do you like to dance?
[]Do you own any Baby Phat or G-Unit?
Total X: 3
--Emo-
[X] Do you cry often?
[X] Do you wear hoodies?
[X] Do you like soft music?
[X] Do people not understand you?
[] Do you write your own poems?
[X] Ever dyed your hair red, black or dark?
[] Do you cut your hair?
[] Are you lonely?
[] Is "Ohio is for lovers" by Hawthorne Heights, a good song?
Total X: 5
--Surfer--
[] Do you surf?
[X] Do you wear flip flops year-round?
[] Is your hair shaggy?
[] Do you wake up before 6 every morning?
[X] Do you own any pairs of shorts?
[X] Are you tan?
[X] Do you want to be at the beach right now?
[] Do you hate tourists?
[] Have you ever called a friend "bra"?
Total X: 4
--Geek-
[] Do you wear glasses?
[] Do you get good grades?
[] Do you use an inhaler?
[] Do you stick pens and calculators into your shirt pockets?
[] Does your mom pick out your clothes?
[X] Are you on the computer often?
[] Do you ever get picked on?
[] Do you look forward to goin to school
[] Are you shy around the opposite sex?
Total X: 1
--Raver--
[] Do you pop drugs?
[] Do you dance to techno?
[] Do you Breakdance?
[] Do Bass speakers make you happy?
[] Do you think the government is out to get you, just because?
[] would you rather go to a warehouse party then a concert?
[] Have any of your friends ever Robo-Tripped?
[] Do you know the difference between Rave Trance and Techno?
[] Are discoteques cooler than american clubs?
Total X: 0 | | |
| i wish i had one person...ONE, that i can call, and be upset...and have them tell me that its ok, and that they love me and that tomorrow will be better...that kind of thing
and NOT, heres WHY you SHOULDNT be upset jordan, youre overreacting, youre being too emotional, get over it, get used to it.
NO
i dont have to
im ALLOWED to be upset
but i guess ill be upset to myself from now on
FUCK IT
FUCK IT | | |
| im so in love...and so miserably alone
i miss walking down the street hand in hand, laughing about stupid things...knowing that everything is ok because youre with the one you love
but we'll make it,
its getting better
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