Currently Listening Scrubs By Various Artists see related

I had a breakdown last night. It was not because I was sad or anything, just overwhelmed. I am trying to get used to this new job and the crazy hours. I don't know it is probably because I have never had a job, but I found it hard to have people tell you what to do and sometimes yell at you and correct you for 6 hours.

The main reason is college. It freaks me out that I am going to college next year. I have redo the SATs (because i crapped them up the first time), fill out the applications, buy things for my dorm, learn how to be independent, and leave... everything in a year. But that is in a year. Right now people I have been friends (best) since kindergarten are leaving. They are not going to be next door, or a few minuets away.  

I was getting upset last night because I just wanted to leave my jobs, my school, force myself to forget my friends because I will be leaving them next year anyway, and just start over.

This is not meant to be depressing, more cathartic. Anyway is this was all getting to me until I heard this song. I knew that if I had told anybody that cares about me all this they would have said what this song said.  

All In My Head by Shawn Mullins

Currently Watching Sarah Silverman - Jesus is Magic By Sarah Silverman, Brian Posehn, Laura Silverman, Bob Odenkirk, Steve Agee see related

Today my parents fought over the morals of the Simpsons during dinner. I just luaghed.

that is not important.

I went to the Library today and got three books:

You Shall Know Your Velocity

Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

The fourth book of the Sisterhood of the Traveling pants

I told my mom it is a weird combination. A deep philosophical book, an adult "mature audience" book, and a book that is below my age level. My mom said it normal for teenagers to be caught inbetween.  

I also noticed on my itunes I have comedians, pop songs, disney songs, and Spiritual songs. I feel like Casting Crowns is embarrassed to be by Dane Cook. I go from cracking up at a dirty joke, to praising Jesus. I am so confused.

that is always not important, I just have nothing to say.

"It was brown and had raisins, and we flushed it for those reasons. This is the poop song."

I just bought her stand-up, and can not stop listening to it.

Currently Listening Sweet Charity (2005 Broadway Revival Cast) By Cy Coleman, Dorothy Fields, Christina Applegate see related

I just had a dream that I was in school. I had to leave chemistry class early to go to the office. I left my bookbage, and shoes there, but when I got back from the office I had to go to history class. When I got to history class she gave us a HUGE packet for exam review to do for the next day. Then I remembered we had to read four books by tomorrow. I was stressing about the books when I went back to chemistry and found out I had to do a project by the next day.

I woke up really stressed and worried about the six books I have to read over the summer that I did not start.    

Three years ago I wrote this:

tonight i have to go to the play at liberty. Joy

...

I have been going to Liberty plays since I was seven, starting with Oklahoma. I believe that was night when the people came down the aisle and I turned to my dad and said "How cool would it be to do that!?" And he said, "You can next year"

"No there is no way I could do that"

prayers do wonders

A week from now I will feel...empty