ok. so i havnt signed on here in like a year.

i miss xanga. it was quite the shit.

so yeah. i know ur prolly not reading this, but idfc that much.

so yeah. here's some LONG awaited quotes, for any of you out there.

It was time to go home, to go home without each other.                                                                                       I said I love you, he said the same. I said,                                                                                                       "Call me when you miss me." He smiled & kissed me.                                                                                       I walked towards my car, & my phone rang.

As we sat there on the school bench laughing & joking & it was that moment when I realized, this is it; this is the last time we`ll ever be together sitting in our group of friends but I knew even though we wouldn`t be together in person, we`d always be together at heart, that`s what real friendship is.

I live for the boy with the beautiful eyes. I live for the boy with the messy hair & goofy smile. The boy that I haven`t seen in six months, but still feel as strongly for him as I did this time last year. I live for the boy I can`t have, the one that rips my heart open over & over again. The boy that has had a hold on my whole world. The boy who has become the sun to my earth ever since the first conversation we had. The boy that finds comfort in the arms of someone else. I live for this one boy, this one person. I live for you.

In a few years, I'll be off to college. High school will finally be over. I won`t get to see him everyday like I used to. My best friends & I will go our separate ways; we`ll be lucky if two of us stay in touch. Nothing will be the same, instead everything will be new. I won`t have a house to come home to everyday. No siblings to scream at. Just alone, in a dorm, far away from home. The people I`ve loved for the longest of times will be another memory added to my photo album.

First we became friends..then we became closer.
i was soo glad we became closer, it felt like nothing
could come between us..until you started cheating &
lying ; we started to become distant. since that day you
broke my heart, i've acted like i'm okay. but every night
i go home & cry myself to sleep & wish that one
day, you will be mine again. i will always love you even when
you hurt me real deep that words can't explain

I feel sorry for you. there was a girl that
would have done anything for you...she might
not be the prettiest or the smartest but...I can
guarantee you...she would have given you the world

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………Somewhere b e t w e e n the procrastination, the homework, the friendships, and the nasty cafeteria food, the calls to old friends . . . the I miss yous . . .And the I LOVE yous . . . And the What are we doing tonights? . . . somewhere b e t w e e n all of the changing and growing And the skipping classes, the studying for tests, And the pretending to be studying for tests, And the downright not studying for tests, I forgot . . . I forgot what it meant to cry . . . I forgot that pretending to be happy doesnt make you happy . . . I f o r g o t that pretending to be smart doesnt make you smart . . . And that pretending to be ok doesnt make you ok . . . I forgot that you cant just forget the past in fear of the future . . . I forgot that you cant control falling in love . . . And that you cant make yourself fall in love . . . I learned . . . I learned that I can love . . . I learned that its ok to mess up . . . And its ok to ask for help . . . And its ok to feel like crap . . . I learned its ok to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day . . . That somehow they'll make it all better . . . I learned that sometimes the things you want most you just cant have . . . I learned that the greatest thing about high school isn't going to be who is the most popular or going to be the parties . . . Or the drinking. . . not even the hook-ups . . . Its the friendships, which means taking chances . . . I learned that sometimes the things we forgive and forget are the things which we most need to TALK out . . . I learned that letters from friends are the most important thing . . . And that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better . . . But, basically, I just learned that my friends, Both old and new, Are the most important people to me in the world . .

I feel like I've tried for so long to be happy, & the more I try, the more that goal slips from my reach. It's almost like quicksand where the more you struggle, the more submerged you become. I've given up on everything. Nothing matters to me anymore. Especially myself. The part of my life that matters least to me is myself. cus I'm no one..& I always have been

The boy woke up - Just 14 years old. He brushed his teeth just like he'd been told. He rushed to the door & grabbed his books. around & around he then looks. From the second he reaches the bus .. the names start to be called. They made fun of his clothes & the book-bag he hauled. The boy never really fit in school. Being smart just didn't make you cool. I remember one day i saw him drenched in mustard. Kids were throwing pizza & the
school custard. Then one girl poured milk over his head. He walked to the office wishing to be dead. & the girl he liked had no heart at all. He gave her a flower & told her to call. She took the flower & threw it in the trash can.& told him she'd never date such an ugly bag. So that night he said goodnight to his mother. Kissed his dad & tucked in his little brother. He put on his shoes & walked through the night. Until his middle school crep into sight. So he took
a step down & he fell. He hung there right in front of his own hell.

Im just a fucked up girl
living in a fucked up life
in a fucked up world
with a fuckin knife
welcome to my world
where being me is never enough

wow. okay. so i was crazy emo half the time, and ready to kill myself.

i'm better now. but that's the quotes i have. love you guys

sry if the aligning's messed up :(

I'm moving to Myspace!

but i will def. keep this Xanga for all of you who read and cant have Myspace!

click here for the link

and i have 73 subscribers!

thats awesome!

ok so the myspace will be up soon, and everyone friend me!

k so heres your quotes for the day!

BIG POST!

27.  I love you cause I could be dancing completely crazy
& instead of laughing at me, you'd be doing it with me =)


28.  & for me it was that warm summer night
when the moon was above us & i looked
into your eyes & told you that i would
love you forever & always



29.  .. but you were ALWAYS right beside me </3



30.  your best friend listens to you when you don't make sense.
stands by you when people call you names,
argues when you're not right at all,
trust you when she knows you'll mess up,
when you cry she's there helping you out &
thats how you know she's truly your best friend


31.  oh, dont worry about her.
shes always upset, shes always in love with someone
who doesnt love her back. shes always heart-broken
so shes fine. by now, shes used to it.

32.  everything happens for a reason,
sometimes things fall apart just
so other things can fall together.
but in the end , what's meant to be
Will always find it's way.



33.  baby, i lied on the phone the other day
with tears streaming down my cheeks ;
i said i was 0KAY..<\3

34.  Boys they like to play with things,
To see what makes them run,
But when it comes to kissing,
They do it just for fun.
Boys never give their hearts away
They play us girls for fools,
They wait untill we give our hearts
& then they play it cool

35.  It's like breaking up is what i wanted all along..
my mind was right & my heart was wrong </3


36. love is complicated, full of sacrifice & compromise,
but maybe that's the best part
++ Felicity ++

37.  Seems like ever since the first day we met.
There is no one else I think of more than you.
Can't seem to forget. Can't get you out of my head.
Guess the verdict's in, I'm crazy over you


38.  -Oh.. [ kiss me ] beneath the milky twilight
Lead me, out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band & make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So [ kiss me ]

39.  Last night I had a dream that we went to Disneyland,
Went on all the rides, didn't have to wait in line.
I drove you to your house where we stared up at the stars.
I listened to your heartbeat as I held you in my arms.

40.  i guess sometimes you have to grow apart
to keep growing together



41.  Even though I'm all alone, I know you want me to be strong,
standing tall amidst the rain. Without you,
life just ain't the same.



42.  Sometimes we need to hold our heads up high,
blink away the tears, & just say goodbye.


43.  Sometimes bad things happen for no reason,
no purpose. They just occur & we're left
to pick up the pieces the best we can.

44.  If these are the best years of my life,
then I am in for some serious second
degree burns in my future.

45.  Teeny: It's normal for things to be shitty.
++ Now & Then ++

Ok, so dont forget to go to the Myspace!

THAT DOESNT MEAN YOU DONT STILL NEED TO COMMENT TO GET UPDATES!!! you do!

love FOREVER!

<3 Bethany

ok, guys.

this is CRAZY!

2 flipping comments in a MONTH.

you all know i love updating this, but if i dont get some more comments, i'm shutting it down.

so poll!

Do you guys think i should move this to Myspace?

comment with your answer!

68 subscribers

ok now, you guys can do soooooooo much better than that.... i got 5 ppls comments in almost a MONTH....

how does that work???

ok well i'll give you 35, cuz i LOVE ya'll!!!

now leave some love!!

1.  Prince Charming probably would have turned out to be a dick anyways.


2.  This is where, if I had a dick,
I'd tell you to suck it.
++ Lake PI ++

3.  She's a pretty typical teenager. Angry, insecure, confused.
I wish I could tell her that's all going to pass,
but I don't want to lie to her.
++ American Beauty ++

4.  Monica: better late then never..right
Q: wrong
Monica: I'll play you..one game, one on one
Q: for what?
Monica: your heart..<3
++ Love & Basketball ++


5.  this is the way I see it,
good friends offer to help in a crisis,
best friends don't take no for an answer.
++ Desperate Housewives ++


6.  & i dunno how long this'll take
maybe a year or two or three
but only one thing is certain;;
im gunna make you miss me.

7.  (( boy this aint no joke its time to show & prove ))
++ Can't Hide From Love ; Mary J Blige ++


8.  so look me in the eye & tell me that
all of the times we shared & the moments
we had together meant absolutely nothing to you..


9.  GiRl: so how does it feel..?
bOy: how does what feel?
GiRl: how does it feel knowing that you're someone's world?
bOy: ...
bOy: you never said that i'm your world
GiRl: do you want me to?
bOy: only if you mean it. <3

10.  so you can scream it at the top of your lungs,
& i still wont give a damn.
call me hard-headed.
call me absent-minded.
call me anything you want ;;
it won't make a difference
i'll still feel the same way <3


11.  i'm not always going to be like this you know.
one of these days..i swear i'm gunna get over
you & your pretty lies.

12.  & you know what? i'm through.
through with feeling like you were
meant to be a part of my life.
through with shedding tears over
impossible dreams. through with
those signals. through with all this
heartache & those countless days
& nights i spent wishing you were
mine. through with feeling helpless
over all the shit you've managed
to put me through. i am so
through with you.

13.  i don't know what to do
it's true ;; i'm goin crazy over you

14.  & victory has never been so sweet.



15.  but a part of me wants to hurt you like you hurt me...
but cruel & unusual torture was never my specialty.

16.  When will you realize that you're ALL i want && need?

17.  WHEN WE H0NESTLY ASK 0URSELVES WHiCH
PE0PLE iN 0UR LiVES MEAN THE M0ST T0 US, WE
0FTEN FiND THAT iT iS TH0SE WH0, iNSTEAD 0F
GiViNG ADViCE, S0LUTi0NS, 0R CURES, HAVE
CH0SEN RATHER T0 SHARE 0UR PAiN & T0UCH
0UR W0UNDS WiTH A WARM TENDER HAND. THE
FRiEND WH0 CAN BE SiLENT WiTH US iN A M0MENT
0F DESPAiR 0R C0NFUSi0N, WH0 CAN STAY WiTH
US iN AN H0UR 0F GRiEF & BEREAVEMENT, WH0
CAN T0LERATE N0T KN0WiNG, N0T CURiNG, N0T
HEALiNG & FACE US WiTH THE REALiTY 0F 0UR
P0WERLESSNESS, THAT iS A FRiEND WH0 CARES

18.  A friend is like a teddy bear ;;
you hug it & cry to it when you're sad
you talk to it when you feel alone
..it doesnt matter what color, size or
condition it's in, it's there for you
no matter what <3

19.  Friends are the ones you never argued with but
best friends are the ones you argue with all the
time but alway overcome the differences <3

20.  You don't go to school to find your husband -- you go to find your *brides maids*

21.  Drama * gossip * girlfights * guys * hugs && kisses *
* bull shit * lies *
i LOVE THESE GiRLS UNTiL i DiE

22. A lonely girl sits in her room
the thoughts & memories are still
in her head. the very last words to
her he said "i think we're better off
as just friends." while she's thinking
"i think i'm better off dead.."

23.  Sick of people ; no one's real
sick of life ; it sucks
sick of trying ; what's the point?
sick of talking ; no one listens
sick of listening ; it's all lies
sick of thinking ; just end up confused
sick and tired ; and no one cares..

24.  How can it be that two
of the greatest friends in the
world can go from being each
others everything to absolutely nothing?

25.  I think the worst thing about life would having to go through it without you

26.  There`s only one cure for a broken heart. .
the one who broke it

27.  Love is life and if you miss love, you miss life

28.  I loved you so much..
but now..it only turned to hate

29.  You can`t just wake up and stop loving someone..it doesn`t work that way

30.  Love is like tug-o-war - you feel the pain from the burn, but for some reason you just cant let go

31.  Last night I wrote you a letter,
but all i was able to write was:
"n ss!w !". .It didn`t make much
sense till I turned it upside down

32.  You never knew what to say or what I wanted to do
and now I look where we are today,
Just because I wasnt good enough for you..

33.  The world always looks brighter from behind a smile.

34.  Come on angel, swallow another pill with your glass of wine
and pretend he really loves you, so you can at least feel something.

35.  I hope her hand breaks when you hold it
I hope she’s allergic to your first kiss </3

all right, im likin em!!!!

Love Always, All the time, All of you,

Bethany

59 subscribers!!!

good job ya'll!

heres 20 quotes 4 today cuz its gettin late.

1.  I don't want to be that girl
that stares at you while you're not looking...
I don't want to be that girl that gets jealous
if you talk to anyone else...
I don't want to be that girl that cries every night
because she wants something she can't have.
but I am, so I guess that I have to live with it.

2.  don't you hate the feeling when
your throat hurts from all the tears
you're holding back && you can't
control the words coming out of
your mouth because there are just
too many things you haven't said?

3.  "There’s no such thing as a perfect guy.
I think it would be strange if somebody
was absolutely everything you always
wanted, because then there'd be no challenge"
-* Jessica Alba

4.  you’re not anyone special to me.. you’re just a
guy.. so don't lead me on especially if its a lie
so leave me alone like you’ve always done..'
because you have hurt me // t o o m u c h //..
[. t o . b e . t h e . r i g h t . o n e . ] ..........«

5.  MEMORIES-you better make alot of them
good, bad, right, wrong. it doen`t really matter because
that `s all you`re going to be left with.

6.  in three words, i can sum everything up
i've learned about life ;; it goes on

7.  you know you had a great time
when you cant tell your mom what you did

8.  no relationship is perfect, ever. there are always
some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to
give something up in order to gain something
greater. but the love we have for each other is
bigger than these small differences. & thats the
key. its like a big pie chart & the love in the
relationship has to be the biggest piece. love
can make up for a lot

9.  I need to say no & break myself away from him.
I need to forget what we had & how much i loved him,
& how much he meant to me cause it's over now,
whether i like it or not..

10.  I just wanna call him up & be like "take it or leave it."
But i'm afraid to cause i have a feeling he'll leave it
cause he doesn't need me like i need him..




11.  bad luck is my middle name
& i have HURT ME
written on my forehead <|3


12.  Love songs suck & fairy tales aren't true.
Happy ending Hollywood isn't for me & you.



13.  There's something about him..something that makes me smile
it's just like this feeling i get whenever i talk to him..
i just know that everything will be okay..
he's someone special <3


14.  Tear me open at my seams
take my heart if you like the beat
take my lungs if it`s hard to breathe
baby, take everything you need<3




15.  he's the most amazing person, he sees everything in a way
that just makes more sense than anything else

16.  no matter how ugly you think you are,
that special someone that loves you
believes that you're the most beautiful
& irresistable thing on Earth &
nothing can ever change that



17.  But things just get so crazy, living life gets hard to do
& i would gladly hit the road, get up & go if i knew
that someday it would lead me back to you



18.  ..& I look at him & all I can think of is the day
when I won't be able to anymore.
++ A Walk To Remember ++

19.  My heart still aches in sadness
& secret tears still flow. What
it meant to lose you, no one
will ever know..<|3



20.  Hey, you know, I have had it with you guys
& your 'cancer' & your 'emphysema' &
your 'heart disease.' The bottom line is,
smoking is cool & you know it.
++ Friends ++

i pretty much love them all this time....

lots of comments!!! (from different ppl!!!!)

Love Always, All the time, All of you,

Bethany <3<3