Sushi_Boy's Xanga

Friends' Live Concert + Clubbing

Sat, 24 Nov 2007 05:18:26 GMT

Otsukare to all who performed at Sonar today!

***

Today I entered a club for the first time in around 1.5 years...to see my friends' live though, and not for clubbing itself. Everytime I enter a club, I get inspired by many thoughts....

(NOTE: I'm NOT trying to put down clubbing or the people who go clubbing!)

There are many girls who are there, hoping/expecting that a guy will come along and buy them a drink. I guess this is ok because there are guys who like buying girls drinks, and a mutual exchange agreement is made. In many cases, these girls are quite visually attractive, but as a regular ho-hum guy such as myself, it seems that I, and people like myself, are invisible to them. Now, I think this is totally fine, because 1) even though I think they are attractive, that's about it and I don't really care for them anyways, and 2) they deserve better. It's just interesting to think of what they expect and want...is it looks, money? As for me, I know I should just stick to my own "kind," which I think is totally fine too...clubbing is just not my territory.

SO, despite having said that, you might be wondering what I'm concerned about. Heh, dunno really...just that clubbing makes me think so much! I assume (most) people go clubbing looking their best. I guess it's kind of hopeless to know that looking your best is still not going to get you that far. Still, I thought today that clubbing is actually good stimulation, because you're polishing yourself in a way, and you get to be reminded of your "position."

I think if I was an attractive girl, I'd love clubbing because I would be idolized and get free drinks too. So, having written all of this, as a result, I guess they do what they do and can get what they get because...they just can. And as for me, I can't, and I just don't suit the environment. But because I don't like to lose, in a strange way, I'm starting to think that maybe I should go to such an environment more often than before, just for the sake of testing myself out. I know I won't do that though for having to pay $15, but the concept itself seems interesting enough to me..hah.

I am not gay, but I have an automatic sense of respect for all guys who I perceive to be good looking. I feel an aura of supremacy around them, and I feel more inclined to do as they say, just because of their appearance. With visually attractive girls though, interestingly, I tend to relate them to the stereotypes that I have as written above, and kind of create a barrier in my mind between them and myself. It takes a while, or I have to get to know them first before I realize that they are no different than anyone else.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Thu, 17 May 2007 01:09:26 GMT

I haven't updated this in a while..

I've just been up to random stuff...going out, etc.

How is everyone?

***

Lately, I'm really missing going on stage with Larme...still a long time to go though before I return..hah.

I am almost done the new song though..

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 12:05:46 GMT

Here are recordings of Tyrant of Mary from the 03/21 live at Shibuya URGA. This is a day after I called to say that I could perform no more because of my ears. Raito is playing and singing at the same time (probably mostly improvised). Holy fuck they are good.

http://www.myspace.com/tyrantofmary (songs are uploaded here)

Takahiro will be in the "Young Guitar" magazine soon apparently...

***

My psychological state these days is interesting. I suppose I haven't really changed...except I don't really laugh anymore...well, I guess I do...at times..

My short term goal is to grow my hair long so that I can cover my face and pretend to curse people when walking. I think it would be pretty fun...except, I'll most likely cut it upon being disgusted by how I look with ugly semi long hair..haha.

***

I have decided to join the university choir to train my voice. I've attended 2 practises already, and realized my voice is shit.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Fri, 06 Apr 2007 14:08:10 GMT

So, I quit my band, Tyrant of Mary, because of my ears. It was great playing with them because I got to learn and experience many things, like how bands and lives work in Japan, and how it's like to play in the professional world (NOT fun..haha).

Speaking objectively, Tyrant of Mary is an incredible band. The 2nd guitar, Takahiro, got second in a guitar contest where SEX MACHINEGUNS ex-guitar, CV PANTHER, was one of the judges. Kouta, the bass, got second in ESP's bass contest. Raito, lead guitar, and Tomo, the drummer, are also amazingly good. I don't know how they will proceed as a band, but I'm sure the members individually will become a someone in the music world in the future. And if they do, I have pics and clips to prove that I once played with them...haha!

So, here's a link to an interview that we received in January. It was finally put online a few weeks ago:
http://door-navi.com/modules/column_music/index.php?id=97

This is the final pic of me when I was still happy on March 15 (taken before the Shibuya Camp show):

Lately I have many mood swings. Sometimes I am fine when I can forget about it, and other times I'm not. Anyways, I was happy to find out that some researchers are trying to develop a cure, which should be available in 10-30 years. At least I have a chance to be cured before I die.

Well, right now I'm trying to be happy as much as I can, so I don't develop stress which will make the symptons worse..

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Tue, 27 Mar 2007 03:38:37 GMT

I am quite homesick right now. Something bad happened to my ears, making me wish that I'd never left Vancouver. I had the worst 2 weeks of my life because of it, and I can only hope that it gets better. Last night I could barely sleep...

I'm missing LARME, my family, and my friends in Vancouver.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Mar 2007 09:46:06 GMT

I'm back in Japan now. My time in Vancouver felt like a dream. Walking around UBC, seeing friends, practising/hanging out with Larme... I did what I was doing 5 months ago, and it felt like only yesterday that I had left Vancouver.
Now, I will have to go back to my life in Japan.

I miss Larme again, and I hope to be able to go on stage with them again soon. Our next live together will be for the first time in 1.5 years, and this time with Tomo. Hopefully we'll perform HATE's self titled "Mr. Hate" at that show too...haha.

Btw, I got a request from HATE to buy a freeze jacket and a t-shirt with a deaf skull with a knife and a hat print on it. These are going to be hard to find....

Saturday, March 03, 2007

Sat, 03 Mar 2007 06:43:35 GMT

It's nice to play with Larme again!...My voice sounds screwed up though cus I've gotten too used to shouting. It actually feels weird to "sing" so much.

Otherwise, I think the water is different in Vancouver than it is in Japan. My hair looks flat and shit cus I can't get it to stand...and my skin looks disgusting cus of not sleeping enough (due to travelling...I hope!). So, in conclusion, I look like shit!...aaaaw well..heh...anyways, it feels so strange! I'm going to be gone again in another few days!

Monday, February 26, 2007

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 11:33:47 GMT

I'm very excited about going to Vancouver. It feels like I'm going on vacation. This is probably the first time I've ever looked forward to leaving Japan for a while...heh.

I can only stay for a little over a week though, because I've got 3 shows in a week once I get back!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Tue, 20 Feb 2007 00:15:27 GMT

I got some ok sounding videos from the O-East show so here they are!
I sound like shit though cus the camera mic didn't pick up enough bass, so I sound like I'm squeaking. Regardless, I do sound like shit and I must do something about it...fuck!

Some more pics first...

Here are the clips!

"Until I Smile"

"Fist Screwed"

half of "I Feel Like Death" and "Cockroach"

***

So, other than band, I have just been up to random stuff....like shopping or occasionally going to places. It's my spring break now, but Miho's gone to France for a month, and my dorm friends are going back to their countries and stuff......so, I think I'm going to go back to Vancouver for a bit in March to re-fuel!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Mon, 12 Feb 2007 13:28:46 GMT

Live at O-East!!

There were around 4 backstage dressing rooms, with a fridge and stage tv monitor in each room. There was also a shower, laundry, and toilet with heated seats and a butt shower.

The stage was fucking huge, but it was rather pointless because the place was really empty anyways. Overall though, it was good experience performing in a big place...

Our lives on the 27 and 28 got cancelled, so I have a month to rest before the next one. As of now, we have 3 scheduled in March, and 2 in April.