Normally I love my drive into work.  Long winding roads, forests and trees, not much traffic, and even the occasional wildlife.  It’s like I’m going into the mountains to go camping (although that makes the ending kind of a let-down).

Friday morning it was raining.  Hard.  As in windshields on high and still can’t see.  Plus the wind was blowing.

As I headed down the hill towards the tunnels I noticed my car was feeling “funny” (that’s the technical term).  It was pulling to right.  “Hmm” I thought.  “I don’t remember it doing that before”.  As it got worse I began to panic.  If my steering goes out I’m going to end up in the trees.  If my brakes give out I’m going to end up wrapped around a tree.  If…  then rumble rumble rumble my right front passenger side tire goes absolutely flat.  Very quickly.

I managed to pull off onto a small shoulder.  It was too dark to even see the tire but I could tell by feel that it was totally flat.  And did I mention it was raining?  Of course, the best part was when I realized I didn’t have cell phone signal.

Can you say stranded?

I wandered around for 20-25 minutes in the wind and the rain.  I went to the Audobon society nearby and tried to find a pay phone – no.  Knocked on doors in hopes someone was at work early – no.  Tried to flag down a couple cars – no.  Prayed and cried a bit. Then I started walking back the way I’d come. Along the now-busier road in the pitch black in the blinding rain and heavy wind.

Thankfully I met a young man who was on his way down the hill on foot.  He had a cell phone with a signal.  I was able to call my office & have someone come get me and a couple hours later AAA changed my tire for me and I was on the road again.  Les Schwab finished the job that evening (I had to buy a brand new tire) and now I’m driving safely again.

I have to say I won’t look at that corner the same again. 

I don’t even know what to say right now.  I’m hurting and hanging on to the Bible verse that Jesus can intercede for me at the throne of God; I have no words.  He knows my pain and understands it better than I do.

I seem to move around in a daze right now.  My body is here but my heart is in Seattle and it is hard to concentrate – things that were so important a month or two ago suddenly don’t matter much.  I jump every time the phone rings, but I worry if it doesn’t.  I wonder constantly if there is something I can do, something I should be doing, even something I could have done that might have changed my present.  In my heart I know there isn’t but still the feeling is there.  I reexamine the past trying to see precursors to what is happening now, wondering if certain things I let slip by were signs that something was wrong.  Maybe I didn’t pray enough; maybe I didn’t pay enough attention.  Maybe if I could just find the right words at the right moment I could make it all better.

But I can’t.  The situation is in God’s hands.  I cling tightly to Him, knowing that He knows the future and whatever happens, it is His will.  He is in control even when so much of life isn’t.  He has made promises that I know He will keep.  His love is stronger than mine and is unending. So when things get dark, when I get angry, when I cry myself to sleep – God is there to comfort me and to promise me a better tomorrow. Even if I have to wait.

One nice thing about Facebook is I have reconnected with a lot of “old” friends.  It’s been fun looking at pictures, seeing their kids, hearing about their lives.  I now have 49 friends and am wondering who #50 is.  Here is my list so far:

1. Hunter Barnes (Prairie)
2. Marla Binet (Prairie)
3. Bryan Blair (15th)
4. Julie Davey (Binet) (Prairie)
5. Jeff Dial (15th)
6. Autumn Doepke (Shelli)
7. Robyn Doepke (Shelli)
8. Cindy Nelson Findley (Prairie)
9. Glenn Flewelling (Prairie)
10. Jean Foist (15th)
11. Viviane Frenzel (Prairie)
12. Rachelle Greenwood (Matt)
13. Marci Meyer Heemstra (15th)
14. Missy Hempe (Montavilla)
15. Julie Holbert (Dan – Azusa)
16. Mark Kooshian (Montavilla)
17. Suzanne Kooshian (Montavilla)
18. LeaAnne Lawson (Montavilla)
19. Lori Lawson (Prairie)
20. Michelle Lee (Prairie)
21. Rick Maxwell (Prairie)
22. Jeff McGreevy (E-Bay)
23. Cameron Meyer (15th)
24. Connie Mitchell (Prairie)
25. Kimberly Morgan (15th & Watson)
26. Kristy Moore (Minter) (Montavilla)
27. Michael Morkve (Montavilla)
28. Lena Esau Philbreck (Prairie)
29. Colleen Prohazka Bruk (Prairie)
30. Becky Beam Scott (Prairie)
31. Mike Scott (Prairie)
32. Peggy Shaw (Watson)
33. Lisa Shdo (15th)
34. Kim Shivers (Montavilla)
35. Fern Short (Prairie)
36. Chris Sveen (Montavilla)
37. Karin Sveen (Montavilla)
38. Sarah Swanson (15th & Watson)
39. Stephanie Swanson (15th)
40. Melody Boytim Taves (Prairie)
41. Will Van Belle (Watson)
42. Machelle Varma (Watson)
43. Dave Wall (Prairie)
44. Angela Whitmarsh (cousin)
45. Dan Whitmarsh (Brother
46. Karina Whitmarsh (sister)
47. Ron Whitmarsh (cousin)
48. Will Whitmarsh (cousin)
49. Carrie Kossen Walters (Watson)

Dan convinced me to join Facebook many moons ago.  I did, we played some games, I broke my foot, I went away.  A couple of weeks ago Shelli discovered Facebook.  Suddenly she had 100 friends, a foo-pet, pictures, games, etc.  It sounded like an exciting new world.

So I went back.  I now have almost 50 friends and for the most part they are actually people I know and care about.  Sarah Swanson, Brian Blair, a couple of cousins, Shelli’s sister and niece, Jeff Dial…  Friends from college, friends from high school.  Mostly people I used to know as opposed to people I actually hang out with now.

However, I’ve found Facebook is sucking up much of my time.  Instead of writing a long informative insightful brilliant blog, I fill out the “what are you doing now” line on Facebook and consider my duty complete.  Who needs to do a 100-word essay on current affairs when you can tell 50 or more people what you are doing RIGHT NOW!  Of course usually it’s something meaningful like “Susan is thinking of cheese” of “Susan is waiting for a tv show” or “Susan is going to take a nap”. 

Occasionally I will have a “wall to wall” conversation or a personal chat with someone.  Jeff Dial and I have been messaging back & forth for a couple of days now, getting caught up on the last 20 years.  Sarah and I chat on an almost daily basis.  Even Shelli and I have been known to IM each other (we are in different rooms, after all).  I’ve been able to keep track of Becky Beam and how things are going with her daughter.  But for the most part, it’s all surface stuff.  I know Dan had a friend for dinner the other day.  I know Sarah watched the Superbowl.  I know Shelli took a break at work.  I know Hunter made dinner and it sounded good.  I know 25 random things about a few of my friends.  I know Sarah can’t stick to a one-word answer even if the quiz calls for it.  I know Colleen, Karin and I have the same taste in movies but Kimberly is way off the deep end. 

I think, in the end, that Facebook is a great tool for keeping in touch with people you may not be able to see all the time but if you do all your communication through it you’re missing out on real life.  If I’m on it too often or too much I get tired and somewhat depressed.  I need a conversation or some human contact to feed my mind.

Now I have to go get some cheese.

I found out today that Verizon Wireless has been withdrawing money from my account.  The money originally went to Verizon Online but I stopped that service back in November.  Online credited my account with $27.99, which apparently Verizon Wireless just kept because I never saw a penny of it.  Since that time there have been two withdrawals of $41.99 each, neither of which came to me or were credited to my account.  I guess someone at Verizon had a good lunch each month.

I cannot believe how this company operates.  Shelli and I have been literally fighting them since last July.  They’ve made promises they haven’t kept.  They’ve taken money they weren’t authorized to take.  They’ve canceled services without warning.  They’ve lied, they’ve hung up on us, they’ve transferred us more than 10 times in one phone call, and they have not done anything to resolve our problems.  They are charging us for services we don’t use, double-billing us for services we used to use but don’t anymore, and when we call to ask about it they are rude to us.  And I don’t mean polite rude, I mean calling you names and being nasty rude.

One time an employee tried to get a supervisor to talk to me.  The supervisor, unaware that I could hear every word she said, went on about how I was just dumb and didn’t understand how one-bill works (they had canceled our one-bill without telling us so it didn’t matter to me how it worked) and how she wasn’t going to waste time talking to me – he just needed to use smaller words so I’d understand.  When he came back I told him I could hear everything; he hung up on me.  This is just one example of what Verizon considers customer service.

I will never do business with Verizon again.  Now I want to know what my options are.  Can I call the police and report the theft of my money?  Do I have to get a lawyer?  We’ve already involved the BBB but it hasn’t done much.  I’m about at the end of my rope here.

In the meantime I am telling everyone I know – steer clear of Verizon Wireless!  Once they hook you they will never let you go!

It’s been a difficult couple of weeks.  I did make it home for Christmas, which was good.  I planned on going up Wednesday but because Amtrak was shut down due to snow, and more snow was expected, Shelli’s mom came and got me & managed to get me on the train Tuesday instead.  I was glad she did, since it then snowed for days & days & days.

Christmas day we went out to Dan & Karina’s.  It was fun to see the girls and I always enjoy the singing, but it was also hard since Michael wasn’t there.  I really missed him.  I did get to see him three times over the weekend, which I’m thankful for.  I also got to spend about four hours with Annhi, Cathy and Amy.

Dan’s birthday was on the 30th.  Happy belated birthday!

New Year’s eve Autumn came and spent the night.  We watched a couple of movies (the new Indiana Jones, and Speed Racer), drank sparkling cider, ate candy and popcorn, and actually made it to about 12:30.  It was fun spending some quality time with her.

Now I’m just catching up at work, doing housework, reading a lot and praying constantly.

Oh, it did snow again yesterday.  I still find it beautiful and exciting!

(Picture by Karina)

These are from our drive to work Thursday, down Cornell Rd.  It was a bit dicey at first but thankfully a gravel truck pulled out in front of us and we followed it all the way in.

It started snowing this morning around 8:00.  It snowed solid until 6:30 or so.  Then it stopped.

Now it’s starting again.

I LOVE SNOW!

I have a lot to be thankful for this year.  For one thing, I’m alive.  Also, I am now walking without crutches!  I still have to wear the beautiful gray boot for at least a few more days but it is so nice to have two legs again instead of three.

My Thanksgiving was truly blessed this year.  I thought I was going to stay home, spend the day with my cousins and their families (which would have been wonderful, I’m sure – I do miss them) and probably work on Friday.  Instead my brother Michael called one day to let me know he wanted me to come home – and he would pay for the train ticket.  Dan got into the act and between us we managed to set the whole thing up without letting mom & dad know.  It was fun to surprise them (or, as Clara says, “Gramma and Grampa are so prised!”) and it was a joy to be able to spend time with everyone.  We’ve all been through a lot this year and I really needed to see and hug and talk to the members of my family.

And as they say, sharing is caring.  As well as the good food, the great conversation, the fun games and movies, we apparently shared a few germs.  I’ve been sick since I got home and from what I hear other members of my family are as well.  Guess it just shows how close we are!  (I love you guys, even if your sniffles did come back to Oregon with me.)

Of course I took tons of pictures. Here are few of them.