| Asalam waikum my brothers and sisters in islam, I know it's been crazy long since I updated but a lot has happened with the world, with my life and with me.
InshaAllah I'll come back this weekend and update but for now. its just a salams. : )
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| to what extent are my rights and wrongs. Has everything just fallen straight outta my hands. and shattered on the floor? how far have i fallen?
I don't deserve anything.
I feel so out of tune, that I feel wanna fall back into the darkness of my sleep n my dreams and not even think about all this.
Why did my path have to be so hard to travel?.. Allah knows best.
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| ... Is it wrong to marry a nonmuslim who accepts your religion?
I know it's forbidden. But how much? to what extent?
certain things u cant control..... I think.
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| just cause i got no other way to talk to you--HarryPotta--. i'll write it here. (i'll delete this shit in a week or so.)
WOW. harrypotta, you still come to my xanga regularly? holy fuck. Dude
do you have a life? cause I dunno. ur not subscribed to me. and i
havent fucking wrote in months. and the one time i do, u comment back
in a day. woooowww. thats really sad. I thought u moved beyond that
xanga
drama shit. guess not. but whatever. do whatever makes u happy right?
if causing useless drama on xanga makes ur days brighter. than fine
fucking do it. i dont want pathetic motherfuckers like u to be sad.
btw. thanks for the comment. i havent heard from ur faggoty ass in a while.
anjabi_Dyme- Honey, you dont have to worry about me. everyone lives
there life with happiness and sorrow. I'm living a normal life. with
both. I'm not drowning and i'm not floating. i'm in the middle. u
know? (btw. I was cleaning out my closet with all my jilbabs and
books, etc. I was wondering do u want it all? no pt in throwing all
that away. might as well give it away to someone... maybe musa might want it? )
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| Asalam walikum.
I've lost touch with religion and Islam as of late. and I dont feel any
sort of inclination anymore to even try to get that touch back. That
intense passion that I had once felt when I feel in love with Islam has
now been replaced with intense anger. and my anger is justified so dont
question it........ . But. what really angers me more that my lack of
faith is this lifelessness that is now in me. the now sudden apathety
towards everything in my life. I don't feel a fckn thing anymore. I
swear the past
three days I've realized that I haven't been awake in any of them. Like
I went thru the days in a completely numb and dead state. even though
the past 3 days have been some of the most exciting moments this
summer (6 flags with a hottie, being smuttered by my boy and his best
friend, and helping a pornstar get over his first love.).......... I
can't feel anymore. I can't feel anything. Nothing touches me these
days. It's a miracle if for a second I feel something. and I dunno.
it's slowly killing me. and the more it kills me the
less I care. and I'm just afraid that at the end of it all, I'm gonna
be so dead inside and I won't even care what the fuck I do with my life
and how it'll effect my hereafter.. and then I'll find out everything
about Islam really
was true. and that I'm so gonna fckn burn for everything I did.. and
then my entire
life will have been a waste. because my afterlife is
screwed..
I'll find out there was no escape. ... Ya Allah. I just want this to
end. Or it to be easier. or something. cause I dunno. I can't take any
of it anymore.
(it's funny. cause most of my friends and parents think I'm the happiest little thing right now.)
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