To B. - who will never know this...

"Because I'm a Girl"

I just can't understand the ways, Of all the men and their mistakes. You give them all your heart, and then they rip it all away...

- You told me how much you loved me, And how our love was meant to be. And i believed in you, i thought that you would set me free...


(chorus)

You should've just told me the truth, That i wasn't the girl for you... Still i didn't have a clue, So my heart depended on You... Whoah

Although i'll say 'i hate u' now, Although i'll shout and curse you out... I'll always have love for you, Because i am a girl

* Been told a man will leave you cold, Get sick of you and bored... I know that it's no lie, I gave my all still i just cry. Never again will i be fooled, to give my all when nothing's true... I won't be played again, but i will fall in love again...

(chorus)
You should've just told me the truth, That i wasn't the girl for you... Still i didn't have a clue, So my heart depended on You... Whoah

Although i'll say 'i hate u' now, Although i'll shout and curse you out... I'll always have love for you, Because i am a girl


--- I loved u so... now u leave me in the cold, How could this be, i thought that u'd only love me... Into the night, i will pray that you're alright.. You hurt me so, I can't let u go ---


(bridge)


You took advantage of my willingness to do anything for love, Now i'm the only one in pain... will you please take it all away~ Oh~

(chorus)


Never thought born being a girl, How i can love you and be burned... And now i will build a wall, to never get torn again~

Although i'll say 'i hate u' now, Although i'll shout and curse you out... I'll always have love for you, Because i am a girl

Although i'll say 'i hate u' now, Although i'll shout and curse you out... I'll always have love for you, Because i am a girl

I just got back from The Granada (LetsDanceLA) in Alhambra. So much fun!

I got there a bit late. Already lots of people. We started with the basic steps and then partnered up in a merry-go-round fashion. I dance with short ones, tall ones, bigs ones, small ones.. lol..

After the lesson, Salsa Dancing started @ 10. Some experienced men led me in some fun moves! Lots of fun, definitely going back! Come with me! :)

i am lame.
i am weird.

so, i cancelled my night out tonight. i planned on going salsa dancing. called and cancelled.

what is wrong with me?

a new year, 2006 without my brandon
i can't call him my brandon anymore
*a new year, 2006 without brandon - not without my friend, because we cant be just friends for a long while

literally immobilized me during finals week
me: fcuk finals, fuck o-chem, fuck bio, fuck human phys, fuck music, fuck o-chem lab, fuck grades, fuck college, fuck life, fuck you, fuck me!
aftermath: worst quarter by far, academically - i plummeted, i plunged downward
did i care? NO. love ruled my world

i am pledging a gated heart now and forever
i will never open my heart as much as i did

no cheating, no lying, nobodys genuine fault
just plain LIFE and all its fcukin offerings & obstacles

why am i lame?

i know Y. i've been back at home sulking, crying, moping around like some sorry ass fool like someone died
funny thing, it felt and still feels like so in comparison

heartbreak - heartache

options. WAIT vs. USE
wait to find the next-to-best guy or use 'em, use 'em for their goods ($)

integrity. values.
i am not one to use people, i can't be that girl in society. i have more class.

not really angry at brandon, probably, psychologically angry at myself.

for now: fuck you, fucker!

fuck i'm tired...!

UB banquet tomorrow at the HUB! yeaaaaaaaaaahhh!

..dont u wish your gf was hot like me.. a freak like me...
  luv it!