THEDEARPIRATES's Xanga

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Wed, 15 Oct 2008 02:43:38 GMT

I don't know what I want exactly
I think I will just do it then see what happens.

Sometimes I think I shouldn't be so obsessive over this and I should obsess over other more important things

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 19:19:37 GMT

going back to my old blog(((:
where i belong

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIFFANIE

Wed, 24 Sep 2008 07:42:04 GMT

hi tiffanie. i hope to see you after exams.
take care nd all the best.
love (:

sorry i need to go study lit now so no time to make this post more presentable and happy for you

out of 7 options

Wed, 24 Sep 2008 07:40:39 GMT

1. Ray Bradbury: Fahrenheit 451
2. Anita Desai: Games at Twilight
3. Mark Haddon: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time*
4. Witi Ihimaera: The Whale Rider
5. Harper Lee: To Kill A Mockingbird
6. Poon, A. and Sim, W.C., eds: Island Voices: A Collection of Short Stories from Singapore
7. Daren Shiau: Heartland (2006 academic edition)

out of all the great books here, my school chose
The Whale Rider
WHAT THE STUPID FUCKING HELL.
why couldn't they have chosen The Curioius Incident of the Dog in the Night-time
I would love to study that book. Its so clever and funny.
Whale Rider is such a bad book I cannot bear reading it.
This makes me so sad.

as simple as holding my hand

Sat, 20 Sep 2008 16:23:12 GMT

Would you please meet me by the water,
We'll have a really good time
Would you please meet me by the water,
'Cause I can't get you off of my mind

I've been thinking everyday about you
Don't fit anywhere into my life, but that's okay
'Cause I think I might be right for you
And because of that, I'm not scared at all
And everyone says I'm crazy
And everyone says I'm a fool
Would you meet me by the water tonight
'Cause I'm ready to break all the rules

Please don't leave me standing
With my heart in my hand
I can't last here
I'm breaking down,
And no on understands why I got here
But I knew from the very first moment
That I met you
You'd be the one

Would you meet me by the water tonight
Would you please fall asleep
Holding my hand
'Cause I've got everything in store for you
Now that you're mine

i want the butt and the legs!!!

omg its like, totally cannot compare
i is be so fattums

when i wished upon a star
my dream came true

i realise this wonderful thing i can do with xanga: blocking users!
whooots(((:

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Thu, 18 Sep 2008 09:07:30 GMT

i love michael cera!
hes so cute! and he does the whole "don't mind me i'm just an awkward teenager" sooo welll
he is awsomeness.
can't wait for nick and norah's infinite playlist

even though exams are around the corner
somehow i am so much less stressed than i was in the middle of the year
i think its really just my mindset
and i think if there is a god, he is really guiding me back to where i am supposed to
and if there is karma, i am turning the corner to a happier place

A NICE DAY

Sun, 07 Sep 2008 18:28:19 GMT

today was lovely
the weekend was wonderful as usual
actually the holiday was a good break
i probably should have done more studying and revising
i guess thats more important than my break

actually my first half of the wek was ruined
i was stuck at home and sick the whole while
but the secondhalf totally made up for it

it was nice hanging out with tiff on thursday and im so glad i bumped into jieming before she left again
shes always leaving me behind
tsk tsk
seeing them again really made me happy. when im with them i become myself again and i don't hide or pretend to be someone else. i am completely myself and i think thats why i am so grateful to still keep in touch with them and still hold on to all the fun times we've had together

i cant wait for the eoys to be over actually
even though i know it will still be studying for o lvls and stuff
the holidays will be a time when i can put more energy into the things i love
like netball, chris, my friends, and of course , myself (:
i think although i am pretty self-centered overall, most of the time i feel like im not thinking about what i want but rather what im SUPPOSED to do instead of what i want to do
like, i've lost some of my personal interests already
this year i completely stopped baking
i loved it so much
especially when i get to eat my own cupcake
or when i see how people like the icing that i've done
it was a hobbie that made me really happy

and i guess the whole thing about my legs kept me down for these few months too
taking time off to go to physio, missing out on suicide runs and fitness training.
i am so scared for the fitness we are doing after eoys
i used to enjoy it and be like 'ok lets go'
i have never felt this way towards exercise before
probably because i now realise how unfit i am
used to tell myself its sjust psychological
so even if i hurt after the physical it didnt matter because i did my best and took it as just physical
it never scared me before (even if i actually were unfit)
but now tis like, ppl are actually telling me im unfit and giving me proof of it
it sucks

but i believe i can take it

i went to a church today
like, for the first time in 2 years
i realised how much i missed my own church and parish even before mass started
i probably won't go for a long itme again but idk, yeah, it was nice waking up early and going for it
i really didnt htinki i would miss it so much
its strange
and i had a long talk with god
like, longer than usual i guess
idk whether its really propaganda or if there was actually some sort of higher power making me feel the things i felt this morning but i will definitely not disregard what i feel because even if it is propaganda, the things they are trying to teach in church are things of good.
and i can never say no to good since i have so much bad in me already

although most people don't need someone to tell them that lying, being jealous, hating, being lazy or being a bitch is wrong, and even if i didnt go to church i would know this
i actually know alot of things
its just that i do need guidance and i do need someone to help me plan my life out and carve it in stone for me.
its quite funny that even if i did have a plan, i would never follow it.
haha.
thats the kind of person i am i guess
specifically, i will havea plan, start it, but can never finish it on time or sometimes i just don't finish it at all
one of my greatest weaknesses that i am still working on

it makes me happy today knowing that i love many people and am loved as well

wow . haven't written this way in forever.
good reflection.
time to sleep.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:10:06 GMT

i drown myself with 'title and registration' and imaginary prata to ease the pain.

i'll change and become wonderful
but thats a wish.
and my wishes never come true

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 12:07:31 GMT

I FUCKING HATE YOU
YOU ARE MAKING ME CRY
FUCK YOUR WALKS AND YOUR BUS RIDES

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Thu, 28 Aug 2008 09:16:05 GMT

i hate writing emo shit on xanga.
everyone reads it
going back to blogspot to vent