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Teh_Naked_Guy
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Name: Eric
Country: United States
State: Minnesota
Metro: Minneapolis
Birthday: 5/19/1986
Gender: Male
Interests: theatre, sports, games, music and singing, writing, martial arts, conversing, anything physical. crafting, knowing things, Dancing in the rain, taking part in Drum Jams, having fun, understanding and helping people
Expertise: giveing advice, arithmetic sequencial thinking, being a random smartass, enjoying almost anything in life, making others have fun
Occupation: Student
Industry: Research
Message: message me
AIM:  Shadowmjolnir
Member Since:
1/23/2005
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|  I
need to shave. Life has been throwing me a lot of curves lately, due to
the decision to actually start dating again. it feels wierd, since its
been a while since I dated anyone, just meeting people and having all
the different thoughts start streaming throught my head, piled,
computed and calculated, yadda yadda yadda. I can't turn my off my
endless thinking, which kinda gets in the way. I HAVE discovered,
however, that I like hanging out with girls who are already taken or I
know I would never be good for, because I feel like I can talk to them
freely. everyone knows what is like, when you see someone who is cute,
and you put on your best face, or whatever the deal is. you almost
always tread lightly. I can do that, I but its almost like I want to
ask a girl out, she will say no, and then I can just talk to her as a
friend, and feel totally comfortable. Im not sure if this is normal,
but its been so long since I thought about it that Im almost not sure
what to do. Sure, I can flirt really well, but thats not what Im
looking for anymore. Its like trying to catch my own shadow. And there
is also the problem of finding someone I like who is interested in me,
which cuts out most of the female population. hmm.... interesting times
are ahead of me
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|  I have been thinking a lot about people lately. Im not really sure why.
correction, I think its because I have been getting more involved with
people as a whole ever since a fateful meeting in september. I continue
to muse over things about how I interact with people in such a fashion
that makes it so different from other people. I was up until 3:00 last
night helping a girl get over her boyfriend who has pretty much
abandoned her. Lately, I have been the deputy of common sense with
people. mostly pointing out things in their life that they always miss
when they search for an answer. Recently, a friend of mine pointed out
that I am a man who does not search for what most would consider the
greater answers in life. Its kinda ironic. Getting to know the world
again after so long is harder than I remembered, but it feels good. I
am starting to remember all the beauty that is stored in some of the
most unlikely corners of existence. I have started talking to more
people, and also Im starting to see parts of myself that I had thought
I lost a long time ago come back. This post started out with me feeling
"Wronged" so to speak, but as I begin writing here, I remind myself,
not only am I going to feel that way sometimes, but that it can also be
a good thing. a reminder that we are not all we seem, or that we are
more than we think. Im considering taking steps where I generally don't. for instance, Im actually considering taking a road trip down to texas, and meeting some people I met online there. I doubt I would ever be considering that if I had not been offered a similar chance by someone else. Another thing a very select few have been doing is actually talking to me about things that matter, and I end up noticing things, even if they don't mention them. Its an interesting feeling...
There are a couple of people who I would like to dedicate this post to,
as a thank you, but I really need their permission before I use their
names in any sort of public fashion. some people might be a little
surprised anyway | | |
|  Its
been an interesting couple of months. Having full time work is hard, as
I expected. I have spent a lot of time trying to meet new people, and
broaden my horizons. I am writing tonight is because I feel guilty of
somthing, I guess. A while ago, I make a series of statments born from
anger. normally, this does not bother me if I mean them, but the
problem was, is I was aiming them at the wrong person. I have had
trouble talking to them since then, even thought we are "cool" again...
every time I talk to them, I think about what an asshole I was, and its
starting to eat away at me. It may be a long time before I feel like I
can look at myself again and be proud. I keep reminding myself that I
hurt someone, and I can't seem to stop. I know in my mind that I should
not be beating myself up over this, but my heart does not share that
sentiment.
the wind is howling outside, and the snow starts to pile up again. I
feel lost at sea. the darkness envlopes me again, and all my thoughts
and worries spill out into the world, for people to see and judge me
however they feel, regardless of any right to do so. I wander naked
through the snow and the storm, and though I grow weary and cold, I
must press on. life does not permit me to stop anymore. I still have
the heart of that same 16 year old boy, but Im not a boy anymore... Im
19, and a man. As such, I must keep moving, or fall down in the snow.
I am still not the man I want to be, not yet...
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The person who is willing to bend their lives to fit their surroundings
is blessed with wisdom. People want to be different, or unique, and
will often take steps to stand out. there is just one problem with that
concept. It makes people hard to relate to. you try to step outside the
box, and you will lose friends over time, because you have less and
less in common. People want to be so different, only to discover the
pain of loneliness it bears. Why do people choose to be a certain way,
without even thinking about it? Another thing the people tend to ignore
is that, despite that they may not care what other people think, they
are stuck on a world with over 6 billion other people. they would do
well to learn to compromise. there are some battles that are just not
worth fighting. I am still the same person I was before. I just know
more as each day comes by, and I do some things differently. The thing
that people forget is that they are in charge of their own lives. they
can choose to be flexible or stiff or arrogant or shy. they can mold
themselves into what they want to be. they just have to try, and put
the effort towards is. The thing is, people want instant sucess.
changes take time, and a lot of effort. I will never stop trying to
improve my flaws, because I want to be better than I am right now.
sure, right now is just fine, but I would like to be better. I choose
to be flexible in life, because it makes it so much simpler and easy to
enjoy. by the same token, you have to have an open mind to be flexible.
So many people who are wrapped up in being a certain way miss out on
such happiness, which I have found people need more of in their lives.
wouldn't you like a little more happiness?
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Hey folks. been gone for a while. A lot of have been happening lately,
and that takes time. I have a full time job now, 9 hours every day. my
plans to be a nurse are kinda falling through for a while, till I can
scrounge up some cash. anyway...been hanging out with people more
lately, as in, real people. its been pretty good for me, since it gets
me out of the house, and learning to talk to people better in groups.
those of you who talk to me outside this place know that I am better
talking to individual people, rather than blending in with groups. its
been a tedious experience, but its good for me. I spent a week at the
harvest festivel, which was awesome. I spun a fire staff (and burned
myself pretty badly) every night, and danced around the fire. I was the
only guy who consitently dance. most of the others drummed, but they
can do that because I sure as hell can't drum. that was fun. spent a
lot of time talking to people, mostly about personal problems they
have. (that means relationship problems they have). I been spending
some time on my new myspace recently, which I am still not sure what to
do with. seeing a lot of people who are so mixed up, but are afraid to
change. Im changing too. Looking to go out and do things a little more.
don't look around on the internet as much, which is why I don't post
here much anymore. I wanna meet people from around here, and hang out
with them. I want to spend the time I still have the best I can,
because I can't for long with this new job.
Todays words of wisdom
"despite all of mans pretenses of greatness, they owe their lives to the topsoil and the rain"
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