| Some JOKES: Woooooo 
So three blondes walked into a building, you would think one of them would have seen it.
There were three passengers were on a pane: an old priest, a teenager, and the smartest kid in the world. The pilot comes back from the cockpit and says that they were having engine failure and would have to jump out of the plane. However when they looked for the parachutes there were only three. The pilot says, "I have a wife and two kids that I have to support. I have to go back to them." And all the passengers decided he was right and that he could go. So he left. Then the smartest kid in the world says, "I need a parachute because I might one day find the cure for cancer." And the other two agreed. So he left. The priest then turned to the other teenager and said, "I've lived a long life so you can go ahead and jump. I feel prepared to meet God." Then the teenager said, "No that's allright we can both leave the smartest kid in the world just took my backpack."
So a frog hops up to a bank teller and says, "Hello, Miss Patty Wak, I was told that I could get a 300, 000 dollar loan." And the teller said, "Why would you think that?" And the frog said, "because my father is McJagger the lead singer for Rolling Stones." The teller said do you have any collateral?" And the frog pulled out a ceramic pink elephant. She then took it and said ," Let me go talk to my supervisor." She went to her supervisor and told him all the frog had told her giving the supervisor the elephant. And the superivsor said, "It's a knick nack Patty Wak give the frog a loan his old man's a rolling stone."
The kindergarten teacher told a boy in her class to go home and learn the first five letters of the alphabet. So he goes home and walks up to his father who happened to be on the phone. He says "Dad what's the first letter of the alphabet?" The father replies, "Quiet I'm on the phone." So the boy goes to his mother and asks her, "Mom what's the second letter of the alphabet?" And she being on the phone said into the receiver, "Oh that's good." Next the boy went to his brother and says, "Brother what's the third letter of the alphabet?" And the brother says, "BATMAN!" since he was watching a batman rerun. The boy next goes to his sister and asks her what the fourth letter of the alphabet was. She was playing candyland with the youngest child and she said, "Gumdrop Lane." The boy thought for a moment and then went out to his father who was now cooking hot dogs and toasting the hot dog buns. He said, "Dad, whats the fifth letter of the alphabet?" His father opened the grill and seeing his hot dog buns burning yelled, "MY BUNS ARE BURNING, MY BUNS ARE BURNING!" So the next day when the teacher asked the boy what the first letter of the alphabet was he replied, "Quiet I'm on the phone." The teacher then said, "How about a trip to the principal's office, young man?" He replied. "Oh that's good." So he walked down to the principal's office. The principal said, "What's your name?" And the boy said, "Batman." The principal shook his head and said, "Where do you live?" And the boy replied, "Gumdrop Lane." The principal then looked at the boy and said, "What is your problem?" And the boy jumped up yelling, "MY BUNS ARE BURNING! MY BUNS ARE BURNING!" And that is why you never ask your family for help with homework. |
