Alright, time to play!

If your name is on the following list, you are now in the race to become the next Super Duper Ultimate Xangan Idol!

Amandasbiggestfan
RiceBunny
berriepop
Vitamin_D
chenmeicai
Amandasbiggestfan
grammarboy
edlives
shake_things_up
MandyStarz
squeakysoul
Amandasbiggestfan
emotionallynotavailable
randyohhhh
andy0l
iamthebella
Amandasbiggestfan
IBeMeng
purpleritz20
authentic_black_dragon
porcupinesol
Amandasbiggestfan

Now Read the Rules!:

1 - Sucking the judges' Peepee is strongly encouraged. Dick sucking abilities will be judged on a scale from 1-10. Anything below a 5 will be automatically disqualified, and anything above an 8 will automatically make it to the next around.

2 - Nude pictures, amateur sex videos, and other forms of explicit behavior is also strongly encouraged. The more flesh we see, the better. Note: this rule does not apply to fat and ugly people who will also automatically be disqualified.

3 - The more illegal activity, drug paraphernalia, graphic or illegal pornographic material, death threats, animal cruelty, destruction of property, or reckless behavior that endangers the lives of others, the better.

4 - You shall not have fun, in fact, this should be a full time job that requires you to spend countless hours on Xanga while you bribe, and whore yourself out to the Xanga community. And let's not forget to mass message everyone because people love reading your spam.

5 - Round 1 ends when I say so.


How to win this round:

To win the first round, 4 out of 6 judges must approve your blog. If you are not awesome, hot, or give good head, please... don't even try. In fact, do us all a favor and quit Xanga because you're wasting bandwidth.


To get the judges to vote for you, you need to:

a) Have promiscuous sex with as many judges as possible.

b) Post nude pictures of yourself. Uglies and fatties need not to apply.

c) Quit Xanga and switch to MySpace, because MySpace is t3h Awesome!!!

d) Give me $100 dollars cash money.

e) Write amazing posts that show off how super duper amazing you are, the more amazing the better!!!


There are 20 competitors at the start of this round.

After this round, there will only be 1 loser left.

William BLACK-SNAKE Hung

Tom I-OWN-THIS-FUCKING-PLACE Anderson

Tila I-LOVE-MYSELF Tequila

Click for uncensored version in MYSPACE cause MYSPACE is the shizzle!

Paris THAT'S HOT Hilton

MY AWESOME LEFT NUT

CHUCK NORRIS

DUDE. CHUCK. FUCKING. NORRIS.

I have a craving......

I'M CRAVING A FEATURED. LIKE A COCK-MEAT-SANDWICH.

Or, for you smokers... a joint. You know what I mean, in fact,

If I don't get featured, I will probably do the following:

1. Stab my eye out with a pitchfork, and then post it, ... my eye. On Ebay. For $34.50!

2. Take a bite out of my cellulite ass and mail it to your mom, because she wants a piece of my ass. har har.

3. See 1 and 2...

So.

Want to help me out?

Pick one of these posts:

• http://weblog.xanga.com/TheMyspaceTeam/657416059/xangalebrity-porn.html
• http://weblog.xanga.com/TheMyspaceTeam/656326061/why-myspace-is-better-than-xanga.html
  

Copy it.

Go to www.xanga.com/featuredweblogs

Paste it into the chatboard as a suggestion.

And... Xanga Team... hint, hint?

If you do decide to help me out, I'll probably forget it. Cuz you're not special like me.

Fuck you all. ^_^ 

1. Our girls are hotter.
Sure, we may be full of vapid content, but our girls have bigger boobs, rounder boobs, and boobs that defy gravity. Xanga is full of small breasted A-cup Asian girls.

2. Girls are easier.
Not only are our girls hot, but they're easy. What more could you ask for? When you private message them, they actually respond. When you show them pictures of your dick, they'll flash their tits. It's amazing!

3. More chances of getting laid for everybody.
Our girls give rides like a public bus. Want sex? Just give them a time and place and you're good to go. Xanga girls, on the other hand, require months and years of begging and prodding before they put out, and even then results may vary. Our site is also filled with desperate military guys who would fuck anything that moves and are constantly on the prowl, so even ugly fat chicks will have a chance.

4.  Not full of Asians trying to sound cool to compensate for small penis.
Why is Xanga full of Asian boys trying to sound cool? We get it, your penis is small. You have to be all thuggish and witty to attract members of the opposite sex. But really, you're just lame because on MySpace, no one would look at you twice. Oh yeah, and our site has black people.

5. Easier to stalk people.
You could just type in a person's name, pull up their account, and have access to their friends list, birthday, and sexual orientation to prevent from barking up the wrong branch. On the other hand, you have to peruse through hundreds of mad boring entries to effectively stalk a member on Xanga. We also don't allow anonymous postings so you don't have to tolerate a bunch of girls who post pictures of their shoulders and hide their faces.

6. We know what Tom looks like, but we can't say the same for John.
Who is this mysterious John? Maybe he's actually a robot that just browses Xanga all day and gives comments based on a random script generator. The world may never know.

7. We have actual celebrities, not Xanga celebrities.
Xanga has TheTheologiansCafe, we have Tila Tequila. Who would you rather get to know? Our celebs actually exist in the real world.