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TheSilkiestOne
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Name: Christopher J
Country: United States
State: Michigan
Birthday: 7/15/1984
Gender: Male
Interests: Writing stories and poetry, thinking. I just like to sit and ponder. Its what's gotten me where I am today.
Expertise: Giving pleasure...take it how you want. Giving advice that works. Now if only I would start advising myself...
Occupation: Engineering
Industry: Research
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  ChocolateSEXY05
Yahoo:  thesilkiestone
Member Since:
7/31/2003
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| Mr. Blue is gone. But he's been around me long enough to have learned strength is a choice. He'll be alright. Its time for me to say fuck it again. SO fuck it. By the end of July place WILL be ready. I WILL have my new whip and a new backup whip. I WILL have adopted my dog. And I WILL be the blackest Black yet seen. Its been feeling so good to unleash my power, and the more I do it the more comes. I like this feeling...It sustains me. Yeah, the time has come. Black's Reign... | | |
| Wow...once again I have managed to let life catch me off guard...Why my brother call me last night like, "I got some bad news. I'm probably not coming back to Michigan." Damn...Not only does that fuck up my plans for this year but more importantly my bro won't be here. Then Blue is leaving is a matter of days for the Air Force. Then Dun will be gone next month to go to FullCell in Florida. I mean damn...I just really feel like I was slowly losing everyone I give a damn about and now its speeding up. As has been stated to me...in the end its only you...well looks like my end is coming...oh well shit happens. I still have my niggas Martell, Jack D, ole Jimmy Beans, and Captain Morgan. hem niggas is real as hell!!! Nah, real talk. Love my fam. Black got ya backs niggas. And Green....look like I might take you up on that movin out the D. | | |
| Wow...its like that...Motherfuckas is evil out here. How you gon shit on somebody heart, then try to kick a nigga like basically 'I already got somebody else so you can be dust.' Well at least I now see how she really is. Disbelief and disapointment. Wow...Cold ass game. I mean damn, the game that cold? Fa real? Ha, guess so, but fuck it, shit happens. I need a new catchphrase for 06... | | |
| Wow...so last night my father decided it was time for another "talk." And he basically is just talking about how people do gravitate to him...and at some point a barrier just goes up. Nobody wants to get to close to him. I said its because they are scared of you. You are like two diffenert people and when you change you go for the throat. He broke down his longing to be close to someone, anyone before he dies His children being the new primary targets. I said I have seen both sides of you, I see the good, but that just makes me alright to be around you. But you can be damned sure I ain't getting close to you. We are as close as I'm willing to allow because I'm giving you an easy track to stab me again. And that was that. Now I'm here at my Mom's a lil down as hinted at below. And here she comes...time to talk. She's talking about how sad she is about our relationship, and I'm telling her its her own damned fault. She talks about her mistakes and talks about my anger, and about me. And I'm listening and thinking wow, my mother has no clue who I am. And just the back to back of all this shit the past week...The shroud of death just looming, my own inner pain, the losses I've taken this week, and after she walked out of the room the one person I was dying to talk to...I can't. And it hits me....damn, here I am now thinking the same shit as Pops...No one seems to want to have a close reltionship with me. They get close, but not too close. And I don't know why. My fam rides with me, and we all close...but not like we used to be. But those are the closeest bonds I have to being satisfying to me. But there is so much I don't let them in on because I know I can't. They won't understand it. And just they way, the manner in which She spoke to me yesterday...it just did something, like I didn't know who I was talking to. So cold, so loveless. Man...I am so glad I got this tat when I did. Because since its fresh I can feel it on my skin. And I think about it. Strength is a choice. And then I feel like I'm alright. 06 is still my year. And I'm NOT gonna let anything take it from me. Dig that. | | |
| Happy New Year....yea....ok...whatever. I guess everyone had fun at my lil New Year's jump-off but me. From the 26th on just was progressively worse and worse for me. I passed out drunk everday of the past week which had me prepped for New Year's. And drink is what I did from 7pm unitl about 3am, then right back at it at 9am. That's my formal statement about the previous year. But I still felt like all was within my grasp since things were turnin around for me. 06 seemed to hold so much promise. But if the first day of 06 was any indicator to what will proceed it then I'm fucked. But can't think like that, gotta stand strong and know that 06 is my year. I got so much planned out. I mean I can't wait til the rain stops. Its been slwoing up til the past week, nigga even was seeing the sun through the clouds, guess I got too happy too soon, because I caught that MEAN lightning bolt like straight through the chest. But its all gravity, because each time I get up, I get stronger. Strength is a choice...and I made mine. And that's what I need to get my home back. | | |
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