| | The dreamHe jerks awake with a start, the sight of the cold white ceiling stealing the smile from his lips. The frantic feeling. He's still holding the pencil in his clenching fist, grabs for his phone, irrationaly, eternally expectant, eternally disappointed. "Relax, Buddy, stay calm, breathe." He leaps from his perch on the top bunk, sighing sharply at the pain in his ankles. Such a long fall. His textbooks fall with him, in a clattering shower around him. The roomie glances up from his laptop with a slightly raised eyebrow, then re-immerses himself in his happy little world. The textbooks remind him of guilt. "Studying," he smirks disdainfully at himself in the mirror over his sink as he randomly runs his razor over the left side of his face. She can't call him, why does he always dream that she will, that she'll be there. "Its against The Rules. Damn The Rules, isn't there such a thing as liberation?" He glances sideways as he gallops down the stairs, someone has stepped on the cup of beer (or urine, he could never be quite sure which it was) sitting in the stairwell next to the 4th floor door. It has splashed on the wall. He sprints through the door to the outside world, the fading sunlight slanting off car roofs into his eyes in tired defiance of something. He slows to a walk. People everywhere. He feels so small again, they each have their worlds just like his, their world shaking fears, problems, all consuming triumphs (he wanted one of those, hadn't had one in a while),shallow jokes, empty smiles. "Do any of them matter, do I?" Had he woken up at all, or was this all just another dream, a fake, squawking, eternal farce of a dream plastered across his minds eye, stealing everything by giving him hope. Would this dream eternally rob him of her? He grimaces at the possibility. To hell with philosophising, how does it help him, or anyone, and yet, how can he stop and just breathe? Is that better, is their way better, are the zombies around him free? And he sighs slowly, dispairingly, because he doesn't know. And yet, it is not dispair, for he knows something. He knows that he loves her. |
| | Posted 9/10/2007 9:38 PM - 8 comments
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New story? It isn't Richard, is it? 
