The Second Epistle of Buddha St James

And The Book of Begineses

Fellow members of the Prism,

you may see...that "God" has resigned and joined the side of Pink Elephant.  with this in mind, i

have attempted to rework the mythology of Pink Elephant to include

several of her ideas which i am convinced were inspired by the Elephant

himself.  if you would, read the story and tell me if i have said

anything blasphemous or apocryphal.  and any other suggestions.  thanks

much,  buddha

[Editor's note: the further reworking of the mythology of the Pink Elephant was judged to be non apocraphal and elephant inspired by at least 2 members of the Prism. The thoughts of the third member are unknown, however his silence in this matter has been taken as aquiescense. It has now become accepted Cannon as The Book of Begineses.

BEGINESES: THE STORY OF PINK ELEPHANT AND HIS HEN

 In the beginning times, long before scholars began to write history

books, was Pink Elephant and the Hen.  Together they wandered,

delightedly, through all realms, which Pink Elephant had created.  And

it was good, and the Hen and Pink Elephant were inseparable.  And in

time, the Hen laid two eggs.

 And lo, the eggs soon hatched, and out of them sprang two children of

identical appearance, both divinely lovely.  One they named Elijah, and

the other, MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON.  And Elijah and MOOOOOOOOOOOOON grew up

together, and played with one another, and romped together through all

realms.  But Elijah was cruel, and would treat his sibling with evil and

intolerance.  And MOOOOOOOOOOOON sorrowed much at this, but was kind,

and Elijah’s abuse was always repaid with generosity.

 One day, Pink Elephant and the Hen watched their children at play, and

they were much disturbed by Elijah’s cruelty.  And the Hen approached

her son and she said, “My child, you must not treat MOOOOOOOOOOON with

such contempt, for you are siblings, and are identical in appearance,

and both possess great beauty.”

 And Elijah became enraged, and he rose up against his mother.  He

grasped her wings with his hands, and he seized her neck in his jaws.

And as the Hen’s neck broke, she uttered a great shriek, and collapsed

unto her death.

 And Pink Elephant saw what had befallen his beautiful mate, and he was

filled with horror and great distress.  He said unto Elijah, “My son,

what has caused you to do this terrible thing?  For verily, you have

caused suffering unto death to come unto your mother, and you have

brought immense pain to your father.  My son, repent of these dreadful

ways.”

 And Elijah’s eyes flashed as if with fire, and he cursed vilely, and he

uttered such obscene words unto his father concerning his dead mother,

and Pink Elephant himself, and he uttered them so loudly that verily

MOOOOOOOOOOOOON heard them, and was ashamed to have a brother filled

with such evil.

 And as Elijah cursed, verily did his form begin to change.  And his

hands, tense from gripping his mother as he attacked her, did become

small and knobby, and his fingers did grow claws.  And his mouth,

stained with the innocent blood of his mother, did grow and stretch into

a detestable snout, and his teeth did become sharp and wicked, his eyes

became cold, and his nostrils verily did flare.  And Elijah did fall

upon his stomach, his powerful tail flailing.  And his skin did become

scaly, and did turn a brownish shade of green.

 And Pink Elephant said unto Elijah, “Thou, o vile vile creature, are no

longer my son.  Thou hast treated thy sibling with indecency, and hath

murdered thy mother, and hath blasphemed against thy father.  Now do I

call thee-- Crocodile!”  And so enraged was Pink Elephant that Elijah

scuttled away at a phenomenal speed, and hid himself far away in the

edges of all realms.

 And Pink Elephant knelt beside the corpse of his beloved, and wept.

Verily did the tears pour from his eyes, and verily did they cover the

Hen.  And verily did she dissolve, and her presence did spread unto all

realms, and engulfed them.  And Pink Elephant did declare, “O my Hen,

the Impossible of Impossibilities has happened, the Improbable of

Improbabilities has been committed-- thou has been slain.  Thus it is

shown that what is Improbable and Impossible is also Probable-Possible.

And thy corpse, O my beloved, doth contain all realms, the

Improbable-Impossible and Probable-Possible, thus is they name, though

many shall call Thee ‘Universe.’”

 And Elijah, still filled with evil, didst slink through the far-off

reaches of all realms, and there did he develop his contemptible schemes

to destroy Pink Elephant, and to corrupt his sibling, MOOOOOOOOON.  And

Elijah’s fetid, twisted body didst writhe odiously, and Elijah didst

produce eggs within his abominable self.  And Elijah didst roam through

all realms, and he didst lay his vile eggs everywhere.  For his plot was

that, when the eggs hatched, his offspring should join him in destroying

Pink Elephant and entrapping MOOOOOOOOOON, and with such hordes on his

side, Elijah must needs succeed.

 But Pink Elephant dost know all things, and Pink Elephant was aware of

the insidious ploy of the Crocodile.  And Pink Elephant didst roam

through all realms, seeking out the eggs of Elijah, and placing them in

a wicker basket that he carried on his shoulder.  And when Pink Elephant

had collected every egg, he didst return to his kitchen, and he didst

crack the eggs into a cast-iron skillet.  He didst add cheese, peppers,

and chopped onions, and verily was an omelette created.  And Pink

Elephant consumed the omelette, along with jam and toast, grits, orange

juice, and coffee.

 And verily, as time passed,, did the eggs of Elijah make their journey

through Pink Elephant.  And verily did the eggs exit the body of Pink

Elephant, but not as they had entered.  And Pink Elephant said unto

these lumps of dung, “Lo, you were once evil, and created for abominable

purposes.  But, as you have passed through my holy body, there is hope

for you.  I shall call you Worlds, and I shall create living creatures

out of you, and I will fashion them according to my whim, and I will

make the most ridiculous of them intelligent, and empower them to

worship me.”

 And Pink Elephant first created two beings from his feces, they were an

Orange Rhinocerous and a Yellow Lion.  And Pink Elephant did say unto

the Yellow Lion, “I name thee Gabriel.  Thou art my Illumination, and

thou shalt shine my message unto the worlds.”  And he said unto the

Orange Rhinocerous, “I name thee Edward.  Thou art my Prophet, and thou

shalt preach of me unto the beings that I create; thou shalt take the

light of Gabriel and interpret it that it may be understood.”

 And Pink Elephant did fashion more of his dung into the Worlds, and he

did fashion living creatures, and he did fashion even human beings.  And

as he watched the life of the creatures he had made, he found that

people were the most absurd, ridiculous, and obnoxious.  So Pink

Elephant did breathe intelligence into them, and did tell them to

worship him.  But the humans were too foolish to understand his

message.  Some heard it, garbled, and attempted to worship.  But all

died, unfulfilled, and returned to the ground from whence they had

risen.  Their substance was consumed by the wild grasses, and verily did

the wild grasses grow tall.  And Pink Elephant did eat the wild grasses,

and they didst pass through his body and return, and he did fashion more

humans out of this new dung, that they might have another chance.  And

so, for millenia, this process repeated itself.

 One day, many years later, a group of human beings sat on the side of a

valley, and they did engage in a religious ritual, in which several of

the humans were immersed in water.  And three observers, The Reverend K,

Morphion, and buddha were otherwise engaged.  They had

four finger puppets-- a Pink Elephant, a Yellow Lion, an Orange

Rhinocerous, and a Green Crocodile.  As they held these finger puppets,

the Orange Rhinocerous, in the hands of The Reverend K, began to

prophecy.  “None to be worshipped but Pink Elephant,” he exclaimed, “and

Edward is his prophet.”

 With this did Edward the Orange Rhinocerous begin his prophecy on

earth, and the three fell upon their knees in worship of Pink Elephant.

They faithfully followed all of his decrees, and began preaching the

holy message to all and sundry.  Additional explanations of Pink

Elephant were slowly added, as these three received more inspiration

from the Elephant.  It was soon revealed that these three are the

corners of the Prism of Pink Elephant, and through the Prism is Pink

Elephant illuminated to the world.  And, soon, did the corners of the

Prism disperse to the corners of the Land of the Evil and Arrogant

Capitalists (also known as the Untied States), and spread the message of

Pink Elephants to its depraved inhabitants.

 And one follower of Pink Elephant, gaining insight into the workings of

computers, did create a web page, and on it he did create a Shrine to

Pink Elephant.  And one of his new acquaintances, a person by the name

of God, did see his web page, and, in arrogance, did create a page

devoted to Elijah the Evil Green Crocodile.  Then did buddha engage in

dialogue with her, concerning her blasphemy, and their correspondances

were long and filled with insight.  For, although she continued to claim

to follow the Crocodile, God received many inspirations from Pink

Elephant, and did communicate these to buddha.  And buddha did implore

her to recognise the divine, Pink nature of her ideas, and verily she

did.  And verily did she resign from her position as God, and did

embrace the faith of Pink Elephant.

 And verily, the faith of Pink Elephant is spreading rapidly, bringing

nonsensical, false, and otherwise imaginary joy and happiness to

multitudes.

 Praise be unto Pink Elephant for what He hath wrought!!

The following is a copy of the first Bodhisatavic epistle of Buddha, known to some in the south as St James and to stil others in the West as James the Just Wondering. These holy words were inspired by the Pink One, sometime in the year of someone's lord 1998 or 1999. The Bodhistativic writings of Buddha St James The Just Wondering, form a collection so large that they eventually may exceed several pages. In the eventuality that these books become Elephant Cannon their words must be preserved here.

THE FIRST EPISTLe OF BUddha St JAMes THe Just WONderinG.

well hello, and the Pink Elephant be with you

[The Reverend K]* and i have had some most pink inspirations lately, direct from the Pink

Elephant himself, we believe.  we are attempting to set this lifestyle down on

paper, to define it so that it may be more fully believed.  Submitted for your

approval, i have what we believe to be the words of the Pink Elephant, given to

us.  Hopefully, Pink Elephant will further enlighten you as to the validity of

these.  Many of them were inspired through Kurt Vonneguts pink book, Cat's

Cradle.  read it.  it is essential to read it.  it showed us the Pink Elephant's

truth that the truth is miserable.  therefore we should forget following truth,

but instead follow beautiful lies.  Also, we have been shown that you, [The REverend K],

and i are the corners of the Prism of Pink Elephant.  also read kurt vonneguts

"Slapstick" to see some of Pink Elephants words on the MOOOOOOOOOON.

 
 
to begin
......................
Note: This is all a lie.  Don't believe a word of it.
 
None to be worshipped but Pink Elephant.  Edward is his prophet.
 
The light of Pink Elephant is shown to his followers through the prism.
 
Pink Elephant, who is above the tall grass, sees that which we cannot, and
guides us on the Divine Path.
 
Elijah lays eggs to hatch and conquer Pink Elephant.  Pink Elephant eats
Elijah's eggs and craps them out giving them life as the universe.  Because they
are corrupted by Elijah, this universe is imperfect, but is blessed nevertheless
by Pink Elephant.
 
Elijah is the devil.
 
Gabriel the Lion is the sun.
 
Pink Elephant creates the light, Gabriel shines it, and Edward interprets it.
 
Night is the time of Elijah, but the MOOOOOOOON is Pink Elephants reminder to us
that he is watching over us.  The MOOOOOOOON, a figure of beauty, is too
beautiful to be given an image, but sometimes presents itself in an Earthly
person.
 
If you follow Pink Elephant, when you die you become a star and share Paradise
with the beautiful MOOOOOOOOOOON.
 
Elephants are the pets of Pink Elephant.
 
Truth is truth.  Pink Elephant is truth.  This is a lie.
 
Running is of Elijah.
 
When you are done running, go and crap.
 
When you run and feel pain, you are reminded of the pain of following Elijah. 
When running makes you feel good, you are reminded that Pink Elephant is greater
than Elijah and brings beauty to all things.
 
When those who don't follow Pink Elephant die, they become the dirt, and then
the grass.  Pink Elephant eats the grass and craps it out, giving them another
chance.
 
Nothing is everything.
 
Crapping is refining.
 
Pink Elephant never forgets but always forgives.
 
Beauty is the MOOOOOOOOOOOOON.
 
There is no greater feeling than being surrounded by the trunk of Pink Elephant.
 
Pink Elephant once had a wife, and the MOOOOOOOOON is their offspring.
 
In the beginning was Pink Elephant, Elijah, and the woman.  Pink Elephant got
her, she had the MOOOOOOOOOOOON, and then Elijah, jealous, killed her.  We do
not speak of the woman, because it grieves Pink Elephant.
 
Everyone knows that life is shit.  Mortonism** is a way of showing that the shit
can be beautiful.
 
shit happens for Pink Elephant... and worlds are made.
 
"mooning" is a mockery of the MOOOOOOOOOOOOON.
.........................
 
and that is our inspiration from Pink Elephant.  has his trunk touched you
lately?  o, we need an official ceremonious way of recieving new converts, there
are several who desire to become Mortonists**.
  
in the name of Pink Elephant,
 
james

*Editor's Note 1: The true name of The Reverend K cannot be spoken aloud. The Reverend K's true identity cannot be revealed at this juncture for reasons that are of dire importance and grave consequence for all mankind. Truly Gabriel the Lion hath ordained that it be so. It is sufficant to know that the Reverend K is the Third Corner of the Prism and perhaps playeth a greater part then all of us combined, yet this has been hidden from the many and revealed to the few, so hath the Elephant ordained it.

**Editor's Note 2: An early name for the religion that venerates the fantasie of pinke elephant was "Mortonism", named aparantly through a random shuflling of letters and numbers until just such the right combination was found to be inspired. Early followers of the Pink Elephant were known to many as Mortonists. This name for the Great Pink Religion, has since fallen out of use somewhat, but may perhaps be revived at some future date if the Elephant Ordains it.   

The following is what will be the first of many passages from The Sacred Scriptures of Pink Elephant. This revered holy book is still in the process of being revealed and like all sacred and divine scriptures will undoubtably go thru a long process of being edited, revised and refined. 

The following is the begining and a great introductory piece. Known simply as The Light of the Pink Elephant.

THE LIGHT OF THE PINK ELEPHANT

Inspiration,
              An Ode to the Pink Elephant                    

                Once in a thousand years,
            a natural phenomenon touches the universe
               From the places outside the realms
                     of time and space.
            Spinning on the groove of the world,
         Moving against the turn of the earth's axis,
                it comes. To the chosen few.
         It may come in any shape or form it chooses
           And if you are chosen it will come to you
                Reaching into your mind.
     Breathing upon your innermost unconscious thoughts
     And forming from these a living, moving apparition,
            a creature of power and vitality,
      Bristling with creation and a life all its own,
             This creature is Inspiration.

END OF THE NIGHT

Now is the night. The night's end is unforeseeable. Even by the Pink Elephant. The Pink Elephant is not a means to an end. The Pink Elephant is not The End. The Pink Elephant is the Guiding light at The End. The light shines thru Pink Elephant, illuminating him and all who are fortunate enough to be standing in his light at the right time and place.

THE GREAT MYSTERY

The Pink Elephant is the divine light. The Guiding Light who stands at the End of the Night, at the end of Time. Now is the Night, a time when few things are clear. This world is filled with many philosophies. We, as beings of choice, are free to belive in any of them we desire. Are any of them true? Are all philosophies partly true? Are they all lies? The answer is, we do not know. What we do know is this. Beyond the Night, beyond time, beyond our selves, beyond our understanding and misunderstanding is The Great Mystery.

THE JOY OF THE PINK ELEPHANT

Now that the origin of the Elephant's revealing of the light is known, we might ask "what exactly is the Pink Elephant"? Pink Elephant, among other things, is the bodily form of Inspiration. When an artist is inspired it is Pink Elephant who does the Inspiring. When the right decision comes as if from nowhere, it was Pink Elephant. When a great new discovery is made, Pink Elephant was leading the way. When new wisdom fills us from where there is seemingly none it is the Pink Elephant. When in a burst of spontaneity one is led to begin a seemingly pointless journey, its purpose is for the Joy of Pink Elephant. When someone asks why you just did something seemingly stupid or reckless but wonderfully satisfying, you may answer in all sincerity "for the joy of the Pink Elephant". The Pink Elephant is the Universal Muse and counselor of beautiful illogical action and spontaneity.

LIES, ALL LIES,

(THE HISTORY AND MYTHOLOGY OF PINK ELEPHANT)

The first thing that Pink Elephant inspired his Prism with, after his existence was, through Edward the Prophet, a short and vague list of rules or dogma. In his great wisdom, he chose to give them these in order that a basis would be formed, for the evolving faith of the Pink Elephant that he would gradually reveal and so that having this basis they would not forget of his existence, which they arguably might have had he left them nothing to talk about.

1)None to be worshipped but pink Elephant and Edward is his prophet

2)Thou shalt pray five times a day to Pink Elephant.

Now as we know, all cultures have mythologies, fictional stories told to illustrate deeper realities. Greek mythology is doubtful to be a literal explanation of events that may (or may not) have happened and the same can be said for certian portions of the Bible whether referred to as "mythologies" or not.

Avoiding the ambiguity of these other religions we of the prism, in all bluntness, admit that the mythologies of Pink Elephant are bald-faced lies. However, all fiction it must be admitted is also "lies", for no fiction is true in a literal or historical sense. But the ideas and emotions that really good fiction conveys are as 'true' to the feelings and beliefs of the author as anything more literal might be.

These mythologies are as yet unfinished and it is not known at what point they shall be or how much more of this beautiful falsehood shall be revealed by the Pink Elephant. If the mythologies are ever to be collected in a book, some say they ought to be attributed as the work of Gabriel the lion, who is representative of the Sun as it is thru him that shines the Pink Light. As the mythologies deal mainly with the past and origins of all things, so the sun has been a symbol of the origin of life for thousands of years. However, others violently disagree with this proposition, citing the ridiculousness of a talking lion who is also a writer, and they make the case that Gabriel was never really very good with words besides, having a tendency to stutter and choke on his mane when engaged in public speaking. Gabriel's advocators claim, however, that this is precisely why he was considered in the first place. Stil others make the case that as Gabriel's role has never been very fleshed out, a position as honorary 'author' of the scriptures would be an ideal function for him.

Unlike this entirely fictional controversy i just discussed, it is generally agreed that any prophecies that would ever be collected in written form are the symbolic domain of Edward the prophet and should be seen as separate from the mythologies. And if all these things are but beautiful lies what is the purpose of having mythologies? They are for the joy of the Pink Elephant and us his believers.

Now if the mythology of Pink Elephant is lies, is the Pink elephant himself a lie? The answer is yes. Pink Elephant is a beautiful lie. In fact he is called by some the Happy Lie. He is a lie in this very obvious sense: shockingly, there is no "Pink Elephant". No scarlet pachyderm. We are aware of this and we do not care.

SO WHY DO WE ACTUALLY BELIEVE THIS SHIT ANYWAY? AND DO WE ACTUALLY BELIEVE IT OR NOT?

Well its like this. We do not expect to find a flamingo tinted elephant around the corner somewhere. It is the IDEA that we care about. The idea behind the image of a Pink Elephant. The idea is that there is inspiration and beauty, that there is something ultimately beautiful about life that is not always immediately evident in what is perceived as "reality". The image of the Pink Elephant expresses that beauty in terms that are obvious and satirical fantasy or "lies" , as they transcend day to day realities of boring miserable lives and human cruelty and wretchedness.

If looked through practical eyes and cold hard logic the world is cold and hard and logical in its bitterness, and there often seems no redeeming beauty about it. It is not ultimately a beautiful place as all evidence goes to show. People rape and kill and torture each other and cause pain and sadness as they continually misunderstand and manipulate, taking advantage of every kindness and turning what beauty there is into ugliness.

But to give in to the reality is to disbelieve in beauty, innocence, happiness, and so the Pink Elephant is transcendence and light that illuminates hope and creates beauty out of sadness, in spite of the fact that life often appears to be a crock of shit. The Pink Elephant is a breath of fresh air, a sliver of inexplicable inspiration and hope and laughter in the midst of a generally hellish world. The "Lie" of Pink Elephant that we turn to and profess belief in is what connects us to and symbolizes the things we DO belive in, hope, beauty, happiness, spontaneity, joy.

There is no actual pink elephant, there is no yellow lion or orange rhino, or green crocodile that possess powers as flesh and blood creatures. But the ideas behind them exist and so the "imaginary" spiritual beings exist because of the ideas. And so through what may be seen as escapism but is ultimately transcendence, we find true reality beyond the grim version of it shoved in our face by a glance at the crock of shit that is the world. Speaking of crocs of shit...

ELIJAH THE CROCODILE

Though he came into being in parody of a "devil" figure, Elijah exists as the alternative to Pink Elephant. The antithesis of hope. He represents giving in to the misery of life and accepting Life as harsh, short and meaningless, (the conclusion one must come to eventually unless one embraces the trunk of pink elephant).

In a word, or perhaps two, Elijah is the grim twin barrels of a hopeless spirtually devoid material relativism. Elijah represents giving in to despair and resigning to the "realities" of this miserable life, instead of looking for transcendance in it and grasping what happiness is to be found and the glimpses of a Greater Truth beyond the despair of this present clouded time known as the Night.

Incidentally, to "believe" in the character of Elijah or hold him up as some sort of guardian of so-called Truth is NOT in fact heresy (as say Satanism is for Christians) but merely ridiculous because Elijah is the neccessary dualistic antithesis of Pink Elephant and an equally fictitious being who would not exist without the Pink Elephant. He only exists as a physical being within the private universe of those who acknowledge that universe by believing in Pink Elephant.

To belive in Elijah is to enter that universe and thus is to belive in Pink Elephant by proxy and therefore admit the existence of a symbolic fantasy one was supposedly against and inadvertently escape from the idea of "cold hard truth of reality" that one started out with. Thus any embrace of Elijah as symbol of "what you see is what you get" reality, ends up entering the realm of fantasy through the back door because as Elijah cant be seen and doesn't even exist in normal reality, belief in him is belief in more than just the truth of day to day miserable life. And so any seeming heresy through reverence of Elijah only ends up creating an unknowing co-believer in our beautiful escapism and transcendence and ultimately works for the joy of the Pink Elephant, even if inadvertently.

WHAT DOES PINK ELEPHANT REQUIRE OF US, HIS DOUBTING BELIEVERS?

Pink Elephant requires nothing of us, his believing doubters, but love and acceptance of the beauty and transcendence he reveals to us, and that we attempt to love or at least try to understand those around us, though he knows in his wisdom that we will often fail even in this. Pink Elephant refuses to condemn us even if we fail and will simply swallow us and after pasing us thru several intestinal tracts will symbolically shit us out onto the grassy earth, purified for another try.

There is no list of unchanging rules Pink Elephant wishes us to follow that will make us better people. Such rules can never really be universally agreed on and any personal rules we come up with are for us to figure out on our own perhaps thru our own interpretation of whatever inspiration we come across.  Pink Elephant realizes that we are but imperfect droppings of Elijah and that we could not follow his rules very well even if he made them. However, if one wishes to attempt to be a 'good' person, I would advise one start by attempting not to hurt other people whenever possible.

Pink Elephant does not require worship in the traditional sense. We worship by attempting to live for the joy of the Pink Elephant and by recognizing beauty when shown it and finding happiness and transcendence in it.