The_Raven_Doth_Quote's Xanga

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Sun, 26 Dec 2004 23:10:56 GMT

oh my fucking christ...i had this long ass entry and i was almost done writting it then i hit the wrong damn key and it closed the window...FUCK ME!!!

okay...basically it said i hate my life my christmas sucked ass and i hate the way people can never think of me as more than just this cute thing that they want to pet and keep and then throw me away when they're done using and abusing me...

and for anyone that cares about what i got for x-mas:
1. socks
2. socks
3. socks
4. socks
and do that another......54 times and you'll understand just how many pairs of fucking socks i got...nothing else was GIVEN to me...just the socks...i don't have to pay them back for the socks...and i got yelled at most of the day for everything imagineable...everything from leyna sleeping in to why her brand new refridgerator wasn't working...me...i got a computer...that i have to pay back...thanks mom and dad...i love you guys...

i fucking hate christmas...

i hope all of yours didn't suck as bad, and if it did or was worse, then i'm sorry...i know how you feel...

Monday, December 13, 2004

Mon, 13 Dec 2004 12:00:58 GMT

ah well...have you noticed that i start most of my entries with "ah well..." i think i should start up "all my fags" again....that was always fun...good title for a soap opera which is my life...anyway...i thought my last update was very creative...i thought it was funny...i was going to make it longer but then tori showed up and i had to leave...anyway right now i'm sort of waiting untill after 1:00 so that i can start calling people about getting jobs and whatnot...i figured that since i had lunch at 12 then other people working in the same business that i did would...but then they might get a whole hour so i fugred after 1 would be a good time...but yeah i'm going to try for Deer Creek Equipment and New Holland something or other...i don't even remember what it's called...that's sad...oh well...deer creek equip. sells and fixes John Deere tractors and other stuff like that too...i know i've said that john deere sucks...and it does...so i figured that since they suck so much then i should almost be garenteed a job there fixing them...but of course that's my logic...i could be wrong...but john deere still sucks...and new holland's kick ass just because i like them better than kubota and cub cadets...new hollands rock my socks...what could be better than blue and white? green and yellow? bright and fucking annyoing orange? white and yellow? nope...blue and white rocks...anyway...yes it's all about the color...eh...well what the color is on i guess...i hope i get the new holland one...that would be nice...eh...well anyway back to what i mentioned earlier... tori and i hung out all last night...it was fun times...we went to church and brenda made her take communion with me under the pretence the "she's never done it before so she'd feel better if she did it with you"...mmhmm...sure brenda...whatever you say...i saw the two of you talking and then looking at me and then talking some more and then you brought her up to me...mmhmm...liar...then after church brenda said that she wanted to ask me a question so we hugged and she asked where ariane was and gave me this look and i said that she was watching her litter sister and that she would come next week...she said okay because it' been a couple of weeks and i said yeah and to what i think you were thinking yes...so now she knows that ariane and i have broken up and she asked if i was okay with that and i said yes i was...then we left and bill attacked up with flowers and made us take one...bill scares me...just a little...well anyway...went to a movie after wards and only saw the last 5 mins of it...that was my fault...again with the number thing and how i can't read them well enough...but we spent most of the time out in the parking lot bitch slapping eachother with leaves and twigs and her running around with my blanket...yeah it was fun times...then went to wendy's and got dinner and sat on top of the parking garage and talked some more...she kept taking my share of the blanket...my whole 4 inches squ. of it...*shakey fist*...then it started to rain a little and it was really windy and then i had to go home...then i had to take her to the 95 exit/entrance thingy and then i went home and slept and then i got up and then i watched tv and then i filed for unemployment and then i started going through the phone book for jobs and then i started this...so yeah...that's about it...fun times indeed...

Friday, December 10, 2004

Fri, 10 Dec 2004 12:28:40 GMT

heh...well if you haven't heard then i guess i'll just tell everyone now and just get it out...i got fired from my job...they said that i wasn't where they thought i was supposed to be with being able to fix tractors and whatnot...i said that how could i be if no one is teaching me...and they said well, umm, there's nothing we can do about that now...i said okay and then i left...i brought my uniforms back today...fun times...said by to richard and dan...told steve to go fuck himself...well not in those exact words anyway...but i was thinking it really hard at him...anyway...went to galls. last night...fun times indeed...i wanted to die for a good part of the evening...yup...fun times indeed...joygasum...then went back to nydia's room and slept on her very...very small bed...almost rolled off of it 5 times...comfy tho...then woke up around 1/4 of 8 like i told myself to, then went back to sleep and woke up again around 9:30 ish...gathered my things and left...the giant rodent thing was scary...and her room made scary noises...but all in all i enjoyed myself...i just smashed my leg in my car while i was moving it so that we could get mail...it hurts now...but i'll live...anyway...i'm supposed to be getting calls from people wanting to hang out because now i have some free time on my hands...yup...fun times to be had...anyway, i'm tired and hungry and the stove takes a really long time to heat up and i've got these quick taters from the schwans guy and i want to eat the whole fucking bag because i'm depressed and hungry...eh...well i called this guy that heidi said might be hiring at her work...he said no...so now i'm going to go look throught the paper...try to see if i can find anything that's worthwhile...oops ovens done, brb...but back to what i was saying...it's not lookin too good right now...oh well...

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Wed, 08 Dec 2004 01:13:50 GMT

well...let's see what has happened in the past few days...nothing really...ariane broke up with me...i'm not surprised...i was waiting for it...but i've been thinking since lastnight went it all happened...i don't think i tell her things because i still want my alone time...just time to do things that i want...without being judged by anyone...just me...i don't do bad things...i behave...i don't sleep around...but it's hard to be with someone who doesn't like my friends because she's afraid that i might cheat on her...i alwasy trusted her with her friends...i knew...or well...thought that she wouldn't cheat on me...then they kissed...alright it was just a kiss...no big deal...then they kissed again...alright whatever...again...no big deal...then they kissed again and a few weeks after that they slept together...i told her it didn't bother me, but the only part that did was who she slept with...if it were anyone else i woulnd't have minded an instant...she says i lie...but she was all prepared to not tell me...oh well...i lie...okay...so does the rest of the world...at least once in their lifetime...mom dad i'm going over (insert name here)'s house be back in a little while...right...you never went...whatever...but she started acting less and less like my girlfriend and more and more like my parents...where are you going? who are you going with? what time are you leaving and when will you be back? why would you want to go somewhere like that?...i never did anything really without here...christ...even at church the last time i went everyone was asking me "where's your other half?" and granted normally i wouldn't have minded...but with what was going on it bugged me...like...a lot...you don't even say hi how are you?...it's just a, hey, where's your other half? other than that it's nothing...no other reason to talk to me...just wondering where she was...the important one...no one really cared about me...oh well...it's alwasy been like that...but now she's pissed at me...and i hung up on her sort of when we last talked...that was rude of me i should have just let her yell at me...but i was getting tired of her yelling all the time...i couldn't just sit there and let her do it...

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Thu, 04 Nov 2004 20:02:51 GMT

well the best thing that happened to me today------>kelsey's mom bought me socks...i guess you had to be there...but then again i was and i still don't understand...yeah...but that was the best thing...i was feeling absolutely fine when i woke up...i felt good and i felt like i was going to have a fantastic day...i got up earlier then usual...got some uniforms together...ate something for breakfast...got in may car...drove to work...felt really good when i got there because it was all nice and warm in may car...sat in my car for a few mins and listened to the radio...then got out and went inside...clocked in and i was stil having a good day...go to open the doors...i don't have my work keys...so i can't open the doors...have to barrow Steve's keys...steve is my boss...opened the door...none of the damn tractors in my bay ran...none...there were 8 tractors and none of them ran...richard and dan refuse to help me under the pretense that they were busy...yup...they were busy...they were busy dicking a round with a stupid weed eater for 15 mins while i pushed out 8 big tractors by myself...but that didn't bother me too much...it's almost always like that anyway...so then i have to go and get gas and i'm sitting there and sitting ther holding the damn handle just right or else the damn pump will shut off...i filled it up to about 25 gallons ish...go in to pay...the damn card i was given by the secretary was rejected...what the fuck?...so i had to walk all the way back to the damn shop get another card and walk all the way back...no one could give me a ride back because dan and richard were still messing with the weed eater...so i get back and no one will help e unload the tank...i can't drive the fork lift so i left everything in the truck that i parked in the way of people so that someone else could get it...got yelled at for that...and i couldn't even yell back because they were my boss's boss..but anyway...after that had to do 7 full services...that means i had to change everything including the transmission fluid...which in some tractors can be 15 gallons of oil...i did two of those today...that was fun...so then of course lunch time comes around...richard and dan decide not to tell me and i missed clocking out...so about 30 mins later after dan and richard get back sharon came over and asked why ididn't i go to lucnh with dan and richard...i told her that i didn't know it was lunch time...and all the while this is going on i got completely drenched and was soaking wet because i had to not only get the tractors i needed out of the rain but i also had to help richard in between the services...so that meant doing all of his shit work and being a time saver...not learning at all...and normally i wouldn't mind about the being soaked to the bone wet...but the heater wasn't working...so it was freezing ass cold in the shop...i'm sitting there shivering and my teeth clattering...and richard tells me to go get him a tractor from outside...and it was burried behind two other ones all the way down at the other end of the lot...it was fun times...then after being his bitch for a couple of hours, i had to drive Mr. Mike down to this truck place after work...completely out of my way...and i don't really like him anyway...he's kind of weird and reminds me of a child molester or something like that...but then i had to drive home...and it was stll pouring down raining...i almost get hit 3 times...get home my sister pushes me over trying to be funny...i land on the ground and what little bit of me that did dry out got soaked again...got inside...and then got yelled at by my dad for no reason...so my day kind of sucked...except when i woke up this morning...i didn't even hit the snooze button 4 times when it went off...i just got up and got dressed...it was nice...i dunno...then my day turned to shit...and i mean shit...i hate dan and richard...and on top of all that i had sharon yelling at me most all day to dump the damn oil pans...and i dump them when i'm done with them...i wasn't even done draining the engine oil out of one when she yelled at me for it...and dan and richard kept leaving their oil pans out so that i had to dump them too because i got yelled at for letting them sit around and because dan and richard said that they were mine...i swear to christ i do NOT get paid enough to be their bitch...i had a shity day...i don't want to back to work tomorrow...i want to quit...but i have to and i can't...i have to pay for my car...oh joy...

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Wed, 27 Oct 2004 19:49:53 GMT

oh my god...the most horrible thing happened to me today...more horrible than dropping a tractor on me or slicing my finger to the bone or splitting my knee cap on a nut or bolt...more horrible than anything you could ever imagine...*eye twitches*...i found my new favorite song...

everyone loves magical trevor,
cuz the tricks that he does are ever so clever.
look at him now,
dissapearing a cow.
where is the cow?
hidden right now.
taking a bow it's magical trevor,
everybody seen that the trick is clever.
look at him there with his leathery leathery whip,
it's made with magic and with a little flip
yeah yeah yeah
the cow is back
yeah yeah yeah
the cow is back
back back back
from his magical journey, yeah
what did he see
in the powerful dimension?
he saw beans
lots of beans
lots of beans
lots of beans
oh beans
lots of beans
lots of beans
lots of beans
yeah yeah

i love that song to death...i've watched the damn thing like 30 times already...i know...it's sad...but i like it...

Sunday, October 24, 2004

Sun, 24 Oct 2004 16:35:15 GMT

okay well let's start on...thursday, shall we?...okay...surprised ariane at school and took her home...took kelsey and ariane to waffel house had a great time...ariane called steph and bugged her about breaking a promise for kelsey...kelsey hated us on the ride home...hehehe...friday i surprised ariane at school again...took her home...went home and then left for harford mall...picked up kelsey and steph...played padiddle on the way to white marsh...played with a puppy and a kitty...kelsey promised not to eat it...poor kitty...went to spencers...hehe...yea, went to spencers...went to go see anna...kelsey and steph wandered off to some bushes...came back...wandered off again...anna wanted to wrestle...the she left for a party...ariane and i went to go and round up our little bunnies...then went to my car and play with things we got from spencers...heh...spencers...anyway...ended up in car...ariane got stuck with the front seat...next time we get the back...*evil eye glarey thingy*...kelsey and steph had to go...ariane went to duck pond...cop told us to leave...he was mean about it too...saturday went to a yard sale for our church...sold a lot of stuff...i got a computer and a couple of suits...gave one to graham...he liked it...did the show...went to the reception...didn't get thanked at all...it was like i didn't exsist...then went to waffel house again...was fun times...sat with kelsey and steph...ta-ost...BUTTER!!!!!!!!!!!..."FEEL MY TOASTY WRATH!!!!!"...kelsey got me introuble but then i fixed it...kelsey lies to make me sad and sex deprived...then drove graham home and kelsey and steph had the back seat again...then had to book it back to waffel house...went to patterson mill park to the upper parking lot...got caught with my pants down...sort of...then had to go home...i hate my life...tho that cop was a LOT nicer than the one from friday...i think he was surprised to find two girls having sex instead of a boy and a girl...hehehe...he let us go...came home and got yelled at for being out till 1 am...oh well...woke up late for church and decided not to go...helped my dad with trim for the basement...it was raining and he was using power tools...go figure...he didn't die or anything...then went to strike and got my tool box and high speed adding calculator that's older than i am...had kelsey try on a suit for a wedding she has to go to...she's going to wear my black suit/tux...it fits her nicely...i might just give it to her since i don't think it'll fit me...eh...might give her that dark blue one to and just save up to buy me a nice suit or something...but that'll be a few years down the road...they're expensive...but anyway...drove leyna to B&N...she got a couple of books...i hoocked up my new 8 year old computer...it takes 15 mins to start...then it locked up and now it won't do anything...oh well...then came down stairs and watched foot ball then got online...yup...it's been a fun couple of days...thank you...and good night.

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Wed, 20 Oct 2004 23:04:53 GMT

okay well i haven't gotten around to changing my site any...but oh well...i'll get to it sooner or later when i have a day to myself...i'm just so busy all the time...ariane makes me do alot of stuff...granted most of it i don't mind...but i have yet to have a day to myself this week...for the past few days at least...and i know most of the people in the company think i'm a dork because i've been to most everything...but most of it i would love to stay home and sleep or watch tv or read or something...play with my dog which i haven't done in a while...but no i have to go to rehearsal and help graham and morgan and teach their sound techies...that is not my job they need to do that and they have to be able to take care of things themselves...i'm not going to be there forever...they need to be able to handle it by themselves...but oh well...ariane is going to make me go untill she graduates...then probably after that too...i'm pretty sure most everyone thinks i'm a looser or something because i won't leave or anything...but no...ariane is making me go...and she yelled at me for not being at the board when a cue was missed or something...well it's not my job to run the board...i'm not even supposed to be there really...i'm not the sound director or the assistant sound director or one of the sound techies...it's not my job to run the sound at all...i can't be there holding their hands...and ariane doesn't need to go and yell at me for it eigther...but i dunno...i've just been depressed for the past couple weeks or so...i had a couple really good days...and nights...but other than that i've just been blah...i need more sleep but i can't sleep...i need to stop eaing so much and loose weight but i eat when i'm sad...i need to not hate my job so much but i can't broing myself to love being a gofer or a holder or a time saver or a vent-to-er...and most of the time i'm getting yelled at or something about something that i have no controll over...that and almost dieing and no one asking if i'm okay or anything but only worrying about weather or not they can fix the door...no...i could have died and they would have got the door fixed faster then they would have called an ambulance...but oh well...i'm just the apprentice...i understood going into it that i would get the shit jobs...but i didn't think i get stuck with every single one of them...but oh well...i'll get over it...it can only last so long...and i have to stop buying tools...i'm going broke over an impact gun...and i couldn't even use it today because the compressor broke too...go figure...i work in the poor side of the shop...the truck side get's everything...we get the hand me downs...but oh well...i'm off to bed to try to sleep...

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Sun, 17 Oct 2004 19:45:16 GMT

the song was for good times...that and i like it...but anyway...i'm thinking about totally re-doing my xanga...it's been like this for a really long time now...over a year or so...i don't really remember when i started this...eh...anyway...i was really tired all day...went to church...i had to dance...it was scary...i hate dancing in front of people i don't know...just...blah...oh well...then went and ate lunch...then went home...then went to B&N and got me a book...then came home...slept for an hour or so...then ate dinner...then got online...i had a thrilling day...woo hoo...yup...it was...sorry i'm just really tired...but i probablywontgo to sleep for a while...yea...and i get to go to work tomorrow...oh what fun...

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Sun, 17 Oct 2004 19:13:01 GMT

Ready for action, nip it in the bud
We never relaxin, OutKast is everlastin
Not clashin, not at all but see my nigga went to do a little acting.
Now that’s for anyone askin give me one pass em
Drip drip drop there goes an ear-gasm
Now you cumin out the side of your face
We're tapping right into your memory banks (Thanks!)
So click it or ticket lets see your seat belt fastened
Trunk rattlin like two midgets in the back seat wrestlin
Speakerboxx vibrate the tag, make it sound like aluminum cans in a bag
But I know ya’ll wanted that 808 can you feel that B-A-S-S, bass
But I know ya’ll wanted that 808 can you feel that B-A-S-S, bass

I like the waaaay you move
I like the waaaay you move (Whoo-o-o!)
I love the waaaay you move
I love the way, I love the way.

I love the waaaay you move
I love the waaaay you move (Whoo-o-o!)
I love the waaaay you move
I love the way, I love the way.

Then the whole room fell silent (Shhhhh!)
The girls all pause with glee, turning left turning right, are they looking at me?
But I was looking at them, there, there on the dance floor
Now they got me in the middle feeling like a man whore
Specially the big girl, big girls need love too no discrimination here, squirrel
So keep your hands off my cheeks, and let me study how you ride the beat
You big freak!
Skinny, slim women got the camel toe within them
You can hump them, lift them, bend them, give them something to remember
Yell out timber when you fall through the chop shop.
Take a deep a breath and exhale your ex male friend, boyfriend was boring as hell
Now let me listen to the stories you tell and we can make moves like a person in jail.
On the low, hoe

Heeeey baby, girl don’t you stop
Come on baby dance all around me
You so fine (you so fine) you so fine
You drive me outta my mind (my mind, outta my mind!) Oooh baby!
If I could I would, just be with yoooou baaaaby
Ooooooh Cause you like me and excite me and you know you got me baby!
Oooooo!

I like the waaay you move (I like the way you move)
I like the waaay you move (Ooo you so sexy baaby!) (Whoo-o-o!)
I love the waaay you move
I love the way, I love the way (Whoo-o-o!)

I love the waaay you move (I love the way you move)
I love the waaay you move (Ooo you so sexy baaby!) (Whoo-o-o)
I love the waaay you move
I love the way, I love the way.

I like the waaay you move
I like the waaay you move (Whoo-o-o!)
I love the waaay you move
I love the way, I love the way.

I love the waaay you move
I love the waaay you move (Whoo-o-o!)
I love the waaay you move
I love the way, I love the way