What  a lovely day this ended in being..! I got to see my Eiri-san, didn't I?! And no whiny brats around to spoil my mood. I stalled a bit, I willl admit now, when he had to leave...go back to his home. But I admit it without regret.

I missed you so much, Eiri-san. You don't know how much negativity was lifted off of my shoulders...how much it meant to see your smile...to have a mere hug from you!

I tell you all to silence yourselves before you make...misjudgements on this post. I merely...cherish my moments with my dear Eiri-san, maybe more so than before.

You make such a difference to me, Ai...you truely do.

Let no one tell you different.

Maybe I can compose a song for you to show you my appreciation of my love..!

Or...Maybe I'll write a poem....

~Cough... Blush.~

~Mutters.~ Shut up..

I am a sad, sad being at the moment....and life just seems to be walking past me.

I wish things will clear up. I hate being at home...I hate being alone.

Alright then...well, it seems once again, I have a band together. Isn't it exciting?

It will most likely be different from what I've had in the past, yes...but better than nothing, I say. and I get to sing...fun. But at least I will have another thing to get done.

Ugh. New jobs, new bands, what's next? New clothes? Gasp! Maybe so...no one knows.

Oh well. I'll update soon, then, I guess...

Until then...Ja Matta Ne. <3

Nnn...going to have a birthday party tomorrow. I'm not sure who all is going to be there...but I'll have to see Yuki another time. Seperate. So we can get up on...old times..

You always anwser...but why? You don't have to...but of course, I guess you know this...I don't know what to think...to do...or to feel anymore. Tears come to my eyes, faster than I can question myself as to why they are coming. Things are so busy now, I hardly have time for anyone, except for when I'm doing this for my college, or for myself...

Getting a job soon, and I've already started trying to learn to drive. I was told that I was better at it than most starting seniors in their first try. Good to hear, I'm guessing? I guess...I don't know...but it was fun.

I drove past your house, this morning, ai. Around 1 or so. I wanted to call, and wake you up, and have you come ee how grand I was doing...but I didn't. I didn't know what sort of...a reaction I would get...

Am I this much of a coward..? Am I really this pathetic..? I hate myself...and I hate everything about me.. -Sigh.- Life....such a horrid thing you are. But I guess, in the end, this is what I come down to...