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| ::sigh:: Wowzers!! I think that it's about time for an update on my life. All summer i've been working and getting stuff ready for school. I'm attending Phoenix Community College to get the required and "pre" classes out of the way. I might take a couple of courses from Glendale Community College too. I'm taking classes that go along the lines for criminal investigating and crime scene investigating. And eventually i'll transfer to NAU, maybe, cuz they're the only school that has a pre-forensic program. my final goal is to work with the law enforcement (as a cop or detective) or for the FBI. FBI sounds more stimulating.
I miss high school. I mean i wouldn't want to be a high school student, but i want to relive the memories. it's so nostalgic. But i'm so excited and scared about starting college. I GOT THE PRESIDENT'S SCHOLARSHIP!!! Yay!! i'm so tempted to use the rest of the money from the government to get an apartment with Mari. but i'll wait on that. we have steps that have to be taken b4 that happens:
1. Graduate from high school...........Check
2. Get a steady job..........................Check
3. Get started with college................Check for me, Mari will start in Dec.
4. Save up.......................................Not going too well with that. We both don't make enough. Which leads to---
4a. Get a second job........................Searching.
I hope i meet new people at the school. that's the thing i'm most scared about. not knowing anyone. i wish Mari enrolled the same time with me, that way i have someone to socialize with and not look like a loser. :( Oh well.
Well folks, that's all the time we have for this program. So signing off from MYRM Channel 3639...have a good night. | | |
| Okay!....i think it's time to update my life. nothing much has happened since the last time. i went to a job orientation....i'm working for Express Men at the mall. It's a pretty high class place. while i was there, i realized i needed to go shopping for some clothes cuz i'm a t-shirt and jeans kinda girl. but it's such a great excuse to go shopping. "I have to buy new clothes for work!"
I've spent most of my days on the computer and playing my guitar. i'm currently working on a song for monkie. she asked so i'm delivering. i have a verse and chorus down and now i'm at a stand still. art takes time...lol
I stayed at Mari's house since yesterday afternoon. we played video games mostly. it was fun, a break from the daily cycle of the boringest summer. I guess it's cuz i know that high school is over and it's time to "start my life". which freakin' scares me the most. what am i going to do with my life? i have a good idea, but what if that's not enough? what if i end up a loser that failed? i dunno...i'm scared.
You know what's been on my mind? Love. i've heard and had many discussions about love. and just then i saw a post from monkie about it. it was: would you rather be with someone you feel strongly about and get hurt or be with someone who has feelings for you, knowing that the chances of you hurting them are high? I put the first one. I would rather have that and lose it then to never know what it was like.
But that's just all talk. i'm the type to usually wonder what would've happened. Many people tell me, including Mari, that i should always try asking out the person instead of wondering. She said that at least i would know. maybe i should...but i'm deathly afraid of REJECTION...
Here's something:
Would you ever tell a person you liked, that you had feelings for them? And would it be worth it to tell them or ask them out?
This thought always plagues my mind... | | |
| ::sigh:: its another day of nothing. i hope the rest of the summer will not be like this.
okay...so here's a quick recap of things that happened since the last time i posted:
After the buffet, i started to feel itching the following days. i hope it's not an allergic reaction to seafood. i mean it's not the first time i've eaten seafood. i kept scratching my face so i got really red. it looked like i was either sunburnt or sick.
i dropped off a contact list for Evelyn that i typed for her. and saw monkie. she looked sad. i wonder why, but i don't like to bother people, so i didn't really pester her about what the matter was. Later tho, my sister and i took monkie to mickey d's and ate. i hoped that cheered her up.
Way later, i spent the rest of the day playing my guitar. learning some more songs and writing. Lol....i told monkie i'd make a song for her. still working on it, you can't rush art. lol...joking. Either words or music comes to me first. but i never really write them down, i should cause it might be worth listening to.
that's all....
here's another interesting thing:
artsandcrass (1:58:16 AM): i kinda know how you feel
bluesmurf0525 (1:58:21 AM): yeah?
artsandcrass (1:58:29 AM): loving someone you cant have
artsandcrass (1:58:38 AM): Im still in love with ******
artsandcrass (1:58:53 AM): even after 2 1/2 years
artsandcrass (1:59:09 AM): i mean ive gotten much better
bluesmurf0525 (1:59:10 AM): wow
artsandcrass (1:59:17 AM): at letting go but
artsandcrass (1:59:20 AM): it still lingers
artsandcrass (1:59:25 AM): first loves always do
bluesmurf0525 (1:59:28 AM): i know
bluesmurf0525 (1:59:37 AM): but you had that
bluesmurf0525 (1:59:41 AM): lucky
artsandcrass (1:59:48 AM): its even harder
artsandcrass (1:59:55 AM): to let somthing you have had go
bluesmurf0525 (2:00:10 AM): oh i see
bluesmurf0525 (2:00:13 AM): yes
artsandcrass (2:00:20 AM): I miss *** so much sometims
artsandcrass (2:00:24 AM): just laying there
artsandcrass (2:00:33 AM): looking at ****
bluesmurf0525 (2:01:24 AM): oh long. we're lovers with no love
artsandcrass (2:03:27 AM): trust me jennifer....if you already love someone this much, its going to be harder when they're your's
artsandcrass (2:03:35 AM): because youll be afriad to lose them artsandcrass (2:04:05 AM): and god forbids they do....the pain will be 1 million times worst
bluesmurf0525 (2:04:14 AM): wow
bluesmurf0525 (2:04:19 AM): that's so deep
bluesmurf0525 (2:04:35 AM): it hurts now, when i don't have it.
artsandcrass (2:04:48 AM): yeah....
bluesmurf0525 (2:05:06 AM): staying friends would be the only thing that's safe
artsandcrass (2:05:37 AM): it will fall together
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| Today.......i did nothing. Everything and everyday has been moving so slowly, like running in water. I slept in because i stayed up all night till 5 am playing lord of the rings: return of the king on my PS2. Then, i stayed up till 7 or 8 am talking to my sister. I woke up around 12 and had somethin to eat. washed up and went online. I saw monkie online and chatted with her for a while. Later on, my family and my aunt went to this new buffet to eat. it's called Pacific Seafood Buffet. It was pretty good and had alot of fun.
There was a cute waiter named Justin who was Chinese. Actually there was alot cute guys and girls there. But the funny thing is my aunt and mom were trying to hook me up with the waiter Justin. If my mom only knew that i'm more attracted to girls than guys, hahah...oh well. that's a secret i'll take to my grave.
Here's something interesting:
Long : you know what, highschool has been a ride
Long : for us I can tell
bluesmurf0525: yeah it has
Long : but the strange thing is, i wouldnt change a thing
bluesmurf0525: exactly.
Long : because I think we are better people for the mistakes we have had
bluesmurf0525: i hear you! preach on brother!!
And now i'm back rambling to a computer once again. | | |
| Xanga
okay...so...this is my first post. i hope no one ever reads it. i just posted. man! okay. so i guess i should write about my day, that's what you usually do, right?
Umm....i stayed over at my best friend's, her name is Mari (pronounced ma-dee), house cause her mom threw a party for her and her twin's (Ritz)graduation. We had liquor and played some drinking games and what not. I was messed at the end of the night, but got even more f***ed up after i took like 3 or 4 tequila shots with mari and her mom. yup, so that was it. i didn't throw up or anything. but mari did, her g/f Evelyn took care of her. i took care of my friend Monkie, who happens to be very beautiful, before she had to leave. it's ironic cause she was probably more sober than i was. i slept well and woke up fine. Today was a lazy day spent watching movies at mari's and then Evelyn's, then finished up with dinner at my aunt's. And now i'm sitting here rambling to a computer about my daily life. weird? i would think so. so forgive me if things seem off or boring...i've never done this before. | | |
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