let`s see;

i`ve finally giving up. moving on, forgetting about him. breaking the promise i made him, but hey, its only ONE promise & he broke how many? like 48394798594. so i dont feel bad. waste of time, waste of effort. i have better things in my life then wait for a selfish little boy anyways. i`m confident, i`m happy. i don`t need him because all he`s done was brought me down. so it`s over. it`s done. will we ever be friends? iuno, probably not. who knows.it`s no communication. i`m enjoying life to the fullest. not being tied down. i`m not crying every night anymore cuhs he was a waste of tears. i`ll always love him but a girl can only take so much & quite frankly, i`m all smiles. Waiting? HA. not for you hunny. i`ll laugh when the day comes when you`ll regret ever losing me & by then i`ll be with someone else. & maybe then you`ll think oh, i made a huge mistake. but too bad. your lost sucka. single life is pretty darn awesome. missed it actually : ]

she`s the girl<3

she`s the girl that waits for him until 1am in the morning, just to talk to him for a few moments. she`s the girl that cries in her pillow every single night because she wishes she hadn't lost him. she`s the girl who tried so hard to keep him happy & satisfied. she`s the girl who not once has thought of someone else. she`s the girl who ignores all the other boys cuhs she knows there isn't anyone else like him. she`s the girl that is completely broken because of his actions. she's the girl  who stood by his side when he had no one else to depend on. she's the girl who never played any games with him & stayed true the whole way through. she`s the girl who'se always thinking about him. she's the girl that would do anything to keep a smile on his face. she`s the girl that tries so hard to keep things inside. she`s the girl who tells everyone she`s okay when really she isn`t. she`s the girl that remembers every single hug, kiss & embrace. she`s the girl that would trade anything to feel him holding her again. she`s the girl who would completely breakdown if he ever replaced her with someone better. she`s the girl that feels like she isn`t enough. she`s the girl that misses holding hands. she`s the girl that lives and breathes because of him. she`s the girl that can`t forget him no matter how hard she tries. she`s the girl that puts all his favorite songs on repeat. she`s the girl who wont listen to what her friends say beause she`s too scared to let him go. she`s the girl that can`t bring herself to throwing away all of his gifts. she`s the girl that knows everything about him. she`s the girl that would love him forever. she`s the girl that has everything except for him. she`s the girl that felt so complete when he was wit her. she`s the girl that wishes, she can be with him again. she`s the girl would take a bullet for him. she`s the girl who treated him like her prince. she`s the girl that always wanted to surprise him with little things. she`s the girl that use to call him late at night just to hear him speak. she`s the girl that wishes his family liked her for who she is. she`s the girl who wanted him to love her. she`s the girl that has given up on boys. she`s the girl who wonders why she lets him hurt her over & over again. she`s the girl that would drop everything just to spend a second with him. she`s the girl who tried to make food for him, but failed miserbly. she`s the girl who use to argue with him all day and all night. she`s the girl who use to play tag with him.she`s the girl who felt like she was on top of the world whenever he spoke to her. she's the girl that could not see herself with anyone else. she`s the girl that hasn`t stopped crying for months on end because the pain she feels is so unbearable. she`s the girl whose heart will not heal.

080605 --- 120806; ITS OVER FOR GOOD.

he choose religion&family over love. i feel so broken, so hurt, so undescribally depressed. my heart is broken into a million pieces. i`m sick of boys. i`m tired of liars. i didn't deserve the shit he put me through. i didn't deserve any of that shit. stupid motherfuckin` excuses. empty&broken promises. you tore my heart apart and stepped on it. you hurt the only girl who loved you more than anyone else. you hurt the only girl who accepted you but you couldn't accept her. you hurt the girl who gave you everything she could. you hurt the girl who waited for you, always. when you went to asia, who waited for you? ME. during ramadon TWICE, who waited for you? ME. who stayed true to you? that was ME. you couldn't even do that. you couldn't even see all the stuff i did for you. all my friends know just how much i love you. all of them. ask christine, ask lyna, even ask anthony. who am i always talking about? YOU. who am i always thinking about, well goddamn its you. when i go to the mall, who am i always planning to get stuff for? you. i was never ashamed to tell people, YEAH, HE'S MY BOYFRIEND & I LOVE HIM. yeah i admit i was bitchy sometimes, but which girls aren't bitchy? you say you need me in your life. do you? do you really? you don't act like you need me. you don't act like i was even worth your time or anything. i never asked you for anything. i always waited to see if you'd think of me, buy me something i'd like. not HUGE GOLDDIGGIN` things just little things. a bear, my favorite candy ANYTHING to remind me that you thought of me. but barely. i didn't need you to ask me for anything. i bought you things whenever i saw something you'd like cuhs i ALWAYS thought about you & wanted you to have everything you wanted. i loved you. you claim that you loved me but i`m not quite sure anymore. if you loved me, you wouldn't have waited this long to tell me that your family wouldn't accept me. if you loved me, you wouldn't have done those things behind my back. you told me everything was going to be okay. you promised me so many things. tell me how many times you've made me cry. just tell me. you took all my happiness away. you took every ounce of happiness out of my body. i hope your happy.  have a happy life.