iM NOT GOiN ON AiM LOTS NEMORE SO CALL MEEH iFF U NEED MEEH...
NEWAYSSSS...
THANX BOYOON, EViE, ND YUKA~~!!! fOH ALL DAt U PEEPZ DiD fOH MEEH!!!
BUt i STiLL HAF2 TELL PPLZ EVRiETHiNG...[YUKA! EViE! BOYOON! EUNiCE!! U PEEPZ kNOE WUt i MEAN] XP
ND JOHN... U DUNNO dAH WHOLE STORiE SO YEA... dUN B ASSUMiNG & SPREADiNG XP i kNOE U WONt...
YAYY!! AMERiCAN iDOL iSH STARTiN AGEN!!!!! HEHE!! i KNOE iM A FREAK DAT ACTUALLY LYKES iT BUt... i WANNA WAtCHiT!! HEHE XP
iM NOT GOiN ON XANGA AS MUCH EiTHER SO YEAA...
TR1SH
[EDiT]
SiGH
i GESS i WiLL NEVER EVER HAF A SHORT ENTRYY... lOl
JACKED OFF MiEE SiS¡¦ FOLLOW DiS ND UR LYFE WUD B MUChO BETTER!
There once was a man who had nothing for his family to eat. He had an old shotgun and three bullets. So, he decided that he would go out and kill something for dinner.
As he went down the road, he saw a rabbit and he shot at the rabbit and missed it. Then he saw a squirrel and fired a shot at the squirrel and missed it. As he went further, he saw a wild turkey in the tree and he had only one bullet, but a voice came to him and said "pray first, aim high and stay focused."
However, at the same time, he saw deer which was a better kill. He brought the gun down and aimed at the deer. But, then he saw a rattle snake between his legs about to bite him, so he naturally brought the gun down further to shoot the rattle snake.
Still, the voice said again to him, "I said 'pray, aim high and stay focused." So, the man decided to listen to the voice. He prayed, then aimed the gun high up in the tree and shot the wild turkey. The bullet bounced off the turkey and killed the deer. The handle fell off the gun and hit the snake in the head and killed it.
And, when the gun had gone off, it knocked him into a pond. When he stood to look around, he had fish in all his pockets, a dead deer and a turkey to eat.
The snake (Satan) was dead simply because the man listened to God.
***Bottom line:
Pray first before you do anything, aim and shoot high in your goals, and stay focused on God. Pass this on in order that someone else might be blessed. Never let others discourage you concerning your past. The past is exactly that - " the past." Live every day one day at a time. And remember that only God knows our future and that he will not put you through any more than you can bear. Do not look to man for your blessings but look to the Lord. He can open doors for you that only He is able to do. Doors that you will not slip through but doors that only He has prepared in advance for you in your favor.
Wait, and be still, patient:
keep God first and everything else will follow.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
P.S. When Satan is knocking at your door, simply say,
"Jesus, could you please get that for me?"
ALSO
JACKED ALL OF DEEZ PERVERTED ND SICK STUFF¡¦ FROM MiEE SiS¡¦
*The Poopie List*
GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.
CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.
SECOND WAVE POOPIE: This happens when you're done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.
POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
GASSY POOPIE: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.
DRINKER'S POOPIE: The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
CORN POOPIE: Self explanatory.
GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE: The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
SPINAL TAP POOPIE: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.
WET CHEEKS POOPIE (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.
THE DANGLING POOPIE: This poopie refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done poopie-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.
THE SURPRISE POOPIE: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a poopie!
its sick but funny read it...lol
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?''
When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!''
The Teacher fainted.
Stuff that Annoys Me!
People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Screw off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?
When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the frigging ceiling up there. What did you come here for?
When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know asshole, you frigging pulled me over.
When people say "Life is short." What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What? Are they going to do something that's longer?
When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's one god damn piece of paper!
When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here asshole!
People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?
JACKD SURVEYY OFF MiDORi
WHAT FIRST COMES TO MIND WHEN YOU HEAR THESE NAMES?
Micheal Jackson- PLASTiC
Mike Khock(say this one outloud)- lOl
Eminem- WANNAbE
Hilary- FLABBY CiNDERELLA
Lindsay-FRECkLY SLUT
Jennifer- BEN AFFLECK [1st iTS J.LO¡¦ NOW iTS JENNiFER GARNER]
Kirsten- BRiNG iT ON
Oliver Kloesoff(say outloud)- lOl
Noah- FLOOD
Adam- LEViNE¡¦ S2 MAROON 5
Kayla- iONNO
Jack- SPARROW
Jill- DAt GiRL DAT WENt UP DAH HiLL WiT DAT OTHER GUY iN DOZ OLD POEM KRAPP
Gretal- HANSEL¡¦ ANOTHER OLD STORiE
Gabriel- ANGEL
Andre- BUDDiE
Christina- REFLECTiON--- NOT MiEE REFLECTiON BUT DAT 1 SONG FROM MULAN
Britney- SLUTTY BiOTCH DAT HAS A KRAZiE LYFE
Justin- iS SO MUCH WORSE DAN USHER!!! NOT EBEN COMPARABLE!!
Lance- MOON
Landan- iONNO
Chuck- TENNiS
Taylor- ANN¡¦ SORRiE BUT ANN TAYLOR iS MiEE MOMZ FAVE STORE¡¦ SO SHE DRAGS MEEH DERR WiT HER TOO¡¦ SiGH
___________________________________________________________________
->CURRENTLY<-
clothing- ORANGE A&F SHiRT¡¦ SHORTS
shoes- NONE
smell- SOME YUMMY SMELLiNG LOTiON¡¦ iTS ADDiCTiNG
taste- STRAWBERRiES&CREAM iCE CREAM YUMM
feeling(texture)- KEYBOARD?!?!
feeling(emotion)- CONFUZED¡¦ i HAF MiEE REASONS
desire- SLEEP
sound- MUSiC?!?! FLY tO tHE SKY 2 B EXACT!! lOl
pain- MiEE HEAD¡¦ THiNKiNG TOO FRiKKiN MUCH THESE DAYZZ
location- HOME
age-15
height- 5-5iSH
thought- Y dAH FRUCK AM i DOiN DiS FRiKKiN SURVEY?!?!
___________________________________________________________________
SHALL WE GO BACK 5 YEARS?so 5 years ago...
how old were you? 1o
what was your height? A LiL LESS DAN 5-0?!?! HOW AM I SPOSD 2 REMEMBER?
what grade were you in? iN JANUARY? 4tH¡¦ iN SEPtEMBER 5tH?! NOT SHURR tHO -_-;;
were you smart? I GESS¡¦?
how did you treat others? iONNO¡¦ i KNOE i BCAME A BiOTCH iN 5tH GRADE¡¦ DATS FSHO¡¦
how did others treat you? OKAYY i GESS¡¦
did you like your teacher(s)? BETTER DAN NOWW!!
what was your favorite color? PROLLY MiEE BLUE PHASE BACk DEN¡¦
what was your favortie number? PROLLY LUCKY # 7
did you have a crush? i THiNK?? RiCH KANGAROO!! lOl GOOD TiMES
did you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? NOPE
did you have a lot of friends? i GESS
are you friends with any of them still? YEA
did you ever make a promise to your friends that in however many years, you will live together? NOPE
what kind of clothes did you wear? BiG SHiRTS¡¦ SUM WEiRD PANTS¡¦ kANT REMEMBER kLEARLY¡¦ lOl
what was your favorite show? PROLLY SPORTS kRAP¡¦ TRUST MEEH i WAS A BiG A SPORTS FREAk BAKK DEN AS i AM NOWW¡¦ XP
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