Live my twisted dream

  James is down until Saturday.
So we're all going out to his boat
drinking tomorrow night. He just turned 21
so we're gonna get

SHITFACED.

Can't wait. Gonna make my move
on Jake tomorrow night. I miss James
so much, it sucks he's not living here anymore.

I skipped 4th, James picked me up.
But it was so fucking hard. I got out of
class and down stairs at like, 1:10-1:15
and didn't get out of fucking school
until about 1:40, there were so many administrators.

Hesh is in the car with him, and Andrew
left with me. So we all came to my house
and toked before my mom came home. Now
I'm babysitting for a while.

Theres a double standard for the way we live
If theres nothing to have, well then theres nothing to save
Ill break a sweat and I dont regret
What youd kill to see brings out the God in me.

Come and be with me
Live my twisted dream
Pro devoted sledge
Time for primal concrete sledge

The man of a thousand retirements
Will always be the one to tell you when to quit
I wont take stock in a withered man
Im reaching into you, Ill make you understand

Come and be with me
Live my twisted dream
Pro devoted sledge
Time for primal concrete sledge

Can't be what your idols are

Been a shitty week thus far.
Hopefully it'll get better, my
stepdad's finally coming home from the hospital.

Doubt I'll do anything this weekend since
everyone will be away. I'm thinking of
going back to kickboxing.

Maybe.

I see you had your mind all made up you group of
Pitiful liars. before I woke to face the day, your master
Plan transpired. -something told me- this job had more to
Meet the eye. my song is not believed? my words some-
What deceiving? now Im unwhole.
Youve waged a war of nerves
But you cant crush the kingdom
Cant be what your idols are. cant leave the scar.
You cry for compensation. I ask you please just give us...
5 minutes alone
I read your eyes, your mind was made up. you took me for
A fool. you used complexion of my skin for a counter
Rascist tool. -you cant burn me- Ive spilled my guts out
In the past. taken advantage of because you know where
Ive come [from]. my past.
Youve waged a war of nerves
But you cant crush the kingdom
Cant be what your idols are. cant leave the scar.
You cry for compensation. I ask you please just give us...
5 minutes alone

Should my eyes open for tomorrow's gain?

I got written up so many times this week.
But fuck my algebra teacher, telling
me to shut up and sit down, fuck him.
I'm not taking that. I mean, if
a student is disrespectful to a teacher,
that's one thing. But if a teacher
is disrespectful to a student first,
that's a whole different story.
And I'm not takin it.

Finished I Hope They Serve Beer
in Hell, half way through The Tale of
Two Cities, and read Dracula Tuesday.

Went down town with Jake last night.
Epic. Tried to go to the beach today
with Tabby, didn't make it because we kept
getting lost and ran out of gas on the side of the
road. Now maybe I can get out tonight,
Jake wants to get together.

In the meantime, I'm going to get stoned
by myself.

68 into the world born
And the seventies, a breath after the war
Life was confusing because of my age
Should my eyes open for tomorrows gains?
I cant help the way I am
Theres no trust and theres no end
What is my name?

(chorus)
It will never change
So here it stays
Forever is my name

From now on, cant look the other way
Keep in mind and listen to what I say
Take under wing all the ones who are lost
Build up around them an infinite wall
Dont you know just who I am?
Take the hand of wisdoms friend
What is my name?

(chorus)
Its time to change
It cant stay the same
Revolution is my name
It will never change
So here it stays
Forever is my name

Learn to Swim

Jake said I was his favorite person.
But sadly I've been hanging out with
his best friend every day, Patrick.
And I mean, Patrick's cool. Really fucking
nice. Really sweet. Really funny. But it's
Jake I'm after.

Patrick said I was cute and that
he liked being around me.
And when he left yesterday he tried
to get a kiss..next time he tries
I guess I have to tell him.
I still love him, though.
He's fun to be with and stuff.

-sigh-
I'm out of cigarettes.
Someone should buy me a pack.
It's reds I like, REDS!

Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see armageddon soon
I certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
Bull-shit, three-ring
Circus sideshow

Of freaks here in this
Hopeless fucking
Hole we call L.A.
The only way to fix it is
To flush it all away
Any fucking time
Any fucking day
Learn to swim
See you down in
Arizona Bay

Fret for your figure
And fret for your latte
And fret for your lawsuit
And fret for your hairpiece
And fret for your Prozac
And fret for your pilot
And fret for your contract
And fret for your car

It's a bull-shit, three-ring
Circus sideshow

Of freaks here in this
Hopeless fucking
Hole we call L.A.
The only way to fix it is
To flush it all away
Any fucking time
Any fucking day
Learn to swim
See you down in
Arizona Bay

Some say a comet will fall from the sky
Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves
Followed by fault lines that cannot sit still
Followed by millions of dumb-founded dipshits and

Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see armageddon soon
I certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this

Stupid shit
Silly shit
Stupid shit

One great big festering neon distraction
I've a suggestion to keep you all occupied

Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim...

Mom's gonna fix it all soon
Mom's coming 'round to put it back the way it oughta be

Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim...

Fuck L. Ron Hubbard
And fuck all his clones
Fuck all these gun-toting
Hip gangster wanna-bes

Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim...

Fuck retro anything
Fuck your tattoos
Fuck all you junkies
And fuck your short memory

Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim...

Fuck smilie glad-hands with hidden agendas
Fuck these dysfunctional, insecure actresses

Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim... Learn to swim...

I'm praying for rain
I'm praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way
I wanna watch it all go down
Mom, please flush it all away
I wanna see it go right in and down
I wanna watch it go right in
Watch you flush it all away

Yeah, time to bring it down again
Yeah, don't just call a pessimist
Try and read between the lines

And I can't imagine why you wouldn't
Welcome any change, my friend

I wanna see it come down
Plug it down
Suck it down
Flush it down

Last night was

EPIC.

Jake picks me up at around 11:30,
we were gonna go to his friend's house, but they
weren't home yet. His name is Patrick.
So we went to walmart so he could get some money,
and to kill time I tell him to go to the park
John and Dan and I always went to.

That park is every bit magical, no doubt about it.
It was too great to even type about.
I love that park and I hate that we moved.

Well then we went to his friend's house. Turns out
his parent are out of town, so we each drink a beer.
And after a while we take some shots of Jager.
I didn't get DRUNK like I wanted, but close.

I couldn't stop laughing and all 3 of us were cuddling
and talking and it was so great and we all just grew
as friends. I love it so.

The picture is far too big to look at kid. Your eyes won't open wide enough
and you are constantly surrounded by that swirling stream of what is and what was.
Well, we've all made our predictions but the truth still isn't out.
So if you want to see the future, go stare into a cloud.
And keep trying to find your way out of that maze of memories.
It all sort of looks familiar, but then you get up close and it's different. clearly.
Each time you turn a corner, you are right back to where you were
and your only hope is that forgetting might make a door appear.
Is it your fear of being buried that makes you so afraid to speak?
An avalanche of opinions like the one that feel that I am now underneath.
It was my voice that moved the first rock and I would do it all again.
So, I mean, it's cool if you keep quiet, but I like singing.
So I'll be holding my note and stomping and strumming and feeling so very lucky.
There is nothing I know except that this lifetime is just one moment
and wishing will just leave me empty. So you can try and live in darkness
but you will never shake the light. It will greet you every morning
and make you more aware with its absence at night,
when you are wrapped up in your blanket baby, that comfortable cocoon.
But I have seen the day of your awakening boy and it's coming soon.
So go ahead and loose yourself in liquor and you can praise the clouded mind
but it isn't what you are thinking it's the course of history, your position in line.
You are just a piece of the puzzle so I think you had better find your place.
And don't go blaming your knowledge on some fruit you ate.
Because there has been a great deal of discussion, yes, about the properties of man.
Animal or angel? You were carved from bone, but your heart it's just sand.
And the wind is going to scatter it and cover everything with love.
So if it makes you happy, keep kneeling Mama, but I am standing up.
Because this veil, it has been lifted. My eyes are wet with clarity.
I have been a witness of such wonders. Oh, I have searched for them all across this country
but I think I'll be returning now to the town where I was born.
And I understand you must keep moving friend, but I am heading home.
I'm gonna follow the road and let the scenery sweeping by easily enter my body.
I'll send you all this message in code, under ground, over mountains,
through forests, deserts and cities.
All across the electric wire, it's a baited line. The hook is in deep boys,
there is no more time. So you can struggle in the water and be too stubborn to die,
or you could just let go and be lifted to the sky