Currently Reading Party Monster: A Fabulous But True Tale of Murder in Clubland By James St. James see related

So my life is so confusing. I feel lost. No matter what I do, nothing seems to fix itself like it has in the past. I know that I am probably just being overly dramatic, which I usually am, but it just sucks right now. I know things always fall into place and that eventually things will be as they should but sometimes its hard to wait for that time to come.

I miss so many things. I miss Warrensburg, as crazy as that sounds, I miss my friends there and the good times I had there. I miss being with someone who meant the world to me. I miss having the feeling of being completely fulfilled and now I feel like the fulfillment I once had is drowning me and not allowing me any air. I miss having money and being able to afford my bills, I miss not having so much to worry about and deal with. I wish I could reverse time, I would change so much.

I haven't written on this thing in forever and I'm sure no one even reads them anymore, but it is a good way to express things I've been bottling up inside. I used to talk about everything I felt, but now I feel like people don't want to hear it so I just hold it inside and let it build up. I'm sure one of these days I will have a break down or something. Oh well it happens to the best of us.

Well I suppose that is all for now, maybe I will write soon, maybe I won't.