JUNE 30TH IS HERE!

Today is definitely one of the most significant days of the year. Yours truly has finally enrolled into a “prestigious” and “excellent” university college called Taylor’s University College. Although it was a rather important day but I don’t think I would say I enjoy it very much. The feeling of making friends with completely strangers just makes me twinge. I don’t feel comfortable at all because I really missed my old friends. I really missed just blabbing out whatever things that came across my mind instead of being uncomfortable.

But I was glad I made a few friends on the very first day! I even met a fellow Sandakanian who was like 7 ft tall! Seriously, I think I need a stool just to get to talk to him. I was THAT SHORT! And also, I met a few funny people like Sammars (Her name’s Sam and she said she was from Mars…so…SAMMARS?), Xue Qi, Zi Kang, Shannon, Shiva, Chelsea, Michelle, Shu Hue, Tareef, Tarimi? , Neo, Amber, Nathan and Ming. I guess that’s about it. They were really friendly people although we are taking different courses.

Shannon, sandakanian, apparently is in the same class as I am!  My class consists of mostly Koreans, a few from Myanmar, and 2 from Saudi Arabia. Quite a diverse class, ay? And my class teacher’s name is Ms Lim, which seriously reminded me of Puan Lim! They had the half tied hair, spectacles and petite frame. I just hope that in this 1 and a half years I would be able to knit closer to them.  It’ll be great to get someone from Korea though! There’s this guy who looked like Bi Rain (Korean actor) lorr! With the thick pouty lips..but I guess I’m not into guys like that though. I like hot, smart and sexy guys! Hahaha! Not those with lots of “man” (hair) la but more of the…dunno la… it’s not for me to judge people.

But I feel really scared, cause I scared I won’t be able to cope with studies. That’s my only fear. I used to be really good in studies but when my grades just went down drastically, I just felt no confidence in myself and I felt that i’m not smart anymore. =(

Anyway, I’ll just pray hard that I’ll be able to understand what the “LECTURERS” telling and I just hope that I hang out with the right bunch of friends.

Lastly, one question. If you’re my friend, based on my personality, what do you think I should be in future?

Here’s some answers from some friends…

Cyrus – Lecturer…(WTH?????)

Anderson – Tauke Kopitiam ( MOIIII…LAP ITU MEJA 9...SATU KOPI O PING!!)

Dana – Daycare center (Where did u even come out with the idea?? Lol!)

Please just leave me some comments. Thank you.

My journey home.

A note from the gorgeous. :)

To my dearest friends...Thank you for being ever so caring and kind towards me. Every time I blog, you guys would pop by giving me encouragement and comments..and also coming up with the right words. You guys have made my path less rocky and I really really appreciate that..alot. :) For these past few months life has been tough and hectic for me. I was hired as a part-time waitress and had a very busy schedule. I'm really sorry for not being able to read your blogs, however, "I'll try my best" to read each and everyone's blog. Love you guys more than bunches of bananas! Until we meet again, do take care and God bless!

...

Anyway, for those who aren't really updated with my current life. I was working at a casual dining restaurant named Pasta Zanmai. I think I blogged about that before right?

Lol..

Anyway (again...), I learnt alot. I mean, I took wrong orders before, I got the "eye" before, Got sarcasm thrown at me before. Basically, I've met many kind of people all over the world.The restaurant where I worked at was a japanese fused italian cuisine. So, basically, it's like having pasta with tempura, pasta with unagi, pasta with chicken teriyaki, sirloin steak with rice..to name a few. :) I basically memorized most names..and sometimes, it's so annoying when customers tried to read the whole name which took them 2 minutes for just a 30seconds long name. I hope you get what I mean.

For example.

Kani to avacado no gomadare shitate.

Which means...Crabstick and avacado in sesame gravy pasta.

The menu that we are currently having now is also very misleading. Like the cream pasta.

Kinoko to onsen tamago no cream pasta.

Kinoko = Mushrooms

Onsen tamago = Hot-spring egg

It's so funny when customers would think that "to" and "no" are actually english. For those who doesn't know Japanese, I wouldn't be surprised though. "To" is similar to the english term "and" whereas "no" is similar to the "aprostophe"..mmm like..Yvonne's bag...Yvonne no bagu. And customer would ask like... Kinoko to onsen tamago no cream pasta...What do u mean by no cream pasta when this is a cream pasta??? SO LOL KANN!!!

Hahaha..i've been ss-ing alot recently. Due to the lack of funness..i have to create my own jokes which i think are funny la...

And there was this once..customer wanted to order parfait (par-fay)...guess what this customer pronounced?

"Uhmm...can I have one Maccha par-FART (parfait) served after meal?"

LOL....PAR-FART???? Hahaha..sorry for being lame..but this is KISAH BENAR..

Anyway..I'm LMAO-ING at starbucks now...lol...PAR-FART..............

Okay..time for my emo-part in life.

Last Sunday morning, I was awaken by the vibration of my 6600. I missed the call, and shortly after that, my house phone rang. My eldest sis picked up the phone and then came into my room.

"Hey Fei, mom got involved with a car accident. Can you please fly back to KK for around 2 weeks?"

.....

I was stunned at that moment. Few days ago, I dreamnt my mom and I were involved in a car accident. In that dream, my mom actually had an instant death due to internal brain damage. I was alone with my dad. (Isn't that abit weird? Cause I thought my mom was supposed to join my dad right?) Well, yeah, we had everything arranged, funeral, insurance..and I was kinda lost..cause..how am I supposed to get money..when my mom's gone?..Then I woke up..and for the whole day,I had been thinking nothing but the dream I had. It was kinda sudden and it also gave me a hint that I can't take things for granted anymore.

For these past few months, I had been struggling with my family issues. To be honest, I am a very sensitive person. I get sadden with things easily and get emotion easily. I'm that I kinda person. Currently, I am staying at my sister's place in Bandar Utama. And in return, I had to do house chores and many other errands for her. I never said no to what she asked me to do..but I need to live my own life too. She expects the house to be clean but sometimes, I also don't know how to clean the house when things aren't settled down yet. Like the cabinets aren't up, there's still some minor constructions here and there. It was really tough for me because I have been brought up having a maid at home. I do spring cleaning at home and also cleaned my own room. But cleaning the whole house, is just too much for me. And I feel suffocated living in there. I don't feel like being at home..anymore.. I guess I'm asking too much..I don't think I should be thinking like that.

...

I was shocked and immediately had this bad feeling. I imagined blood all over..Mom being unconscious. The most dramatic accident ever..like the ones shown on tvs. My tears started welling at my eyes and slowly dripped across my cheeks. I was terrified I kept on sighing. Thinking..why? Why is she sooo reckless? She still young meh? Aiyorh...why laa.....? Although my mom has a huge and "rigid" figure which kinda looked robust...But in fact, my mom's a weak and fragile woman.

The earliest flight was 2.15. And there are only 2 seats left. So at 11.40, my sister and bro-in-law sent me to LCCT. My BIL sped his C230 like nobody's business. He was driving at 160km/h. It was FUN! If only my mom wasn't in such condition, I would have been "yiha-ing" at the backseats. We reached there around 12.20 and went to the counter. Unfortunately, we were told that the tickets are sold out. And we had to purchased 6.20pm flight, I don't have any problem waiting tll 6.20 but I just wanna make sure my mom's alright. So the guy said, we purchased the ticket first then later ask the check in counter whether can I slip in the 2.15 flight.

Ticket costed around 500 bucks man!

EXPENSIVE LIKE CRAZY...AND FOR SUCH SHITTY SERVICE.

This is what happened..An indian fella and another indian fella. Let's just name them A and B.

A= MANAGER

B= SOME SHIT ASSISTANT

My sister told the A that the guy at the counter said we might be able to slip in for the 2.15 flight. I need to catch the earliest flight to see my mom. I kinda overheard the conversation..it was similar to something like this.

A : I'm sorry we can't do anything, the flight's full.

Sis: Well, can't you at least try something. Give her the next earlier flight?

A:  You have purchased the 6.20 flight, why not you just go for that flight?

Sis: But the guy said we can go for an earlier flight.

A: Yeah, you need to actually come here first. That is what I don't like about them. You need to come here first.

Sis: The guy didn't say anything.

A: Yeah, you've purchased 6.20 flight meaning you have agreed to go on the 6.20 flight.

Sis: (...DUNNO WHAT TO RESPONSE)...But we need to go for an earlier flight, isn't it possible to just squeeze one person in. She's hand-carrying her luggage.

A: I'm sorry miss. (Ignored sis and attended another customer)

ME:(WTF!!!!!!!!!) *put the bag in between the conveyer belt and the counter.. blocking the entrance*

A: Excuse miss, your bag is blocking my way in.

Me: *gave that stare...like I care?*

A: Excuse miss, I need to go in, and your bag is obstructing the way.

Me:Your blocking my way to see my mom.

A: Why are you shouting at me?

Me: (WTF...SHOUTING???) I'm not shouting at you, I;m just telling you that You are blockin my way to see my mom.

A: If you are not gonna remove your bag, Im calling the security.

Me: *Like I care? look. and THE STARE*Do you have any manners? You are blockin my way to see my mom...You don't understand..

A: What nonsense are you talking about? I said Excuse me miss and you started shouting. What nonsense you talking huh?

Me: I'M NOT SHOUTING..(DAMNIT DIMWIT ASS)

Sis: Fei, just remove you bag..*started apologising*

Me: *Removed bag and put it on the floor. Stood in front of the counter and gave the STARE*

A: *can't take the stare any longer* Hello, security. Ada orang tengah block itu jalan. Tolong datang sini sekejap.

Me: *I stood where I was where I wasn't blocking even the ant's path..The security came but didn't know where to shove me to cause I wasn't blocking man! DIMWIT ASS*

A: Talking nonsense.

Me: Do you learn any manners at school? *Took out phone..my intentions are purely evil..to take pic of that bastard and send it to customer service and get him fired.*

Meanwhile, B was attending to my sister who seemed to be waiting patiently...pleading...haih..my sis..so nice.. =_=" I was just standing there innocently....

B: Miss, do you have attitude problem? You were so rude and now you even took picture of our manager. That's it. I'm calling the police. I don't care. I'm gonna take that phone away. You are not supposed to be taking pictures here. SECURITY, TAKE HER PHONE.

Me: (I WAS SERIOUSLY..LIKE "WHAT SHIT AM I IN NOW MAN" FEELING...I was thinking whether I should lie o not..I think I chose to lie.. I guess God was disappointed at me.. =\) I didn't take your photo. Can;t i even send an sms?!

B: YOU ARE LYING. I SAW YOU TAKING HIS PHOTO AND NOW YOU ARE LYING SOME MORE. WHAT SORT OF ATTITUDE YOU HAVE MISS? WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?

Me: (I should have replied..MY PROBLEM IS YOUR EXISTENCE. YOU AND YOUR SHITTY ATTITUDE. I WAS A GOOD STUDENT AT SCHOOL DUMBASS..I GOT MORE A'S THAN YOU EVER HAD IN YOUR LIFE U ASSHOLE...IF THERE ARE RULES IN THIS COUNTRY YOU DESERVE TO BE IN JAIL 10 YEARS AGO AND HAVE A LIFE SENTENCED YOU STUPID FAT MAN! NAH..AHBUGIM MEGA COMBO! DID THAT HIT YOUR HEART?!...Unfortunately, my head was slow..due to the "impact" I had...so...i replied....) No?! SEE LA! CHECK LA! *Try to delete but..actually..wanna mms it to my own number than..delete*

B: YOU ARE DELETING IT NOW...I WON'T TOLERATE THIS ANY LONGER. YOU HAVE BEEN RUDE TO MY MANAGER AND TOOK PICTURE OF HIM. I'M CALLING THE POLICE NOW. THIS IS SERIOUS OFFENSE. YOU ARE GONNA GET CAUGHT. SECURITY TAKE HER PHONE!

Me:...COME SEE LA! I WHERE GOT TAKE!

Sis : Im so sorry..Im really sorry.

B: Miss, who is she to you? Does she have some attitude problem or something?

Sis: Im really sorry..fei, please go to the back and wait for me..

Me: ....*obediently..*

Finally, i stood at the back..feeling lost..hopeless...I cried..cause I was never scolded attitude problem by someone before..in my whole life! I mean...by peers or family members..rarely la..Not that I've noticed of..But by someone...from AIRPORT? So rare baa!!! >.< Memalukan...

Then in the end, it was settled..I got on board 2.15 flight. The police and people all were friendly to me ya know.. Like they smiled at me this.. But that two idiots... First time encounter with problems like this.

AIRASIA CUSTOMER SERVICE SUCKS BADLY!

YOU STUPID IDIOTS..YOU HAVE DISGRACED YOUR COMPANY AND BY NOW, YOU SHOULD FIND YOURSELF A HOLE TO HIDE INTO. YOU HAVE NO COMPASSION AT ALL AND ONE DAY YOU WILL GET IT! I BELIEVE IN KARMA! WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND. (Hahaha..sorry to scare you, my friends.)

To those who are currently working there (if you happened to read this blog), I don't mean you and Im not stereotyping all of you. Just that these two staffs was really terrible..they were abusing their rights and had gone overboard. Just because I'm a teenage girl, doesn't mean they have the rights to yell at me and threaten me. I feel thoroughly disappointed at your customer service...

To my dearest friends, my mom's alright. She's just terrified of that incident and has some minor injuries..And also some bruises. Keep her in your prayers..Right now, I have no car...My car's ripped apart..So if you wanna bring me around...OKAY A... :) No problem..HAHAHHA

Please forgive me for the overly used vulgarities. I was unable to surpressed my feelings anymore when talking about those dumbass..I shall add tags.. which says airasia, air, asia, bad, lousy, ass, service, rude, terrible, horrible, vegetable....

Until then, u know I love you. :)

xoxo, yafuizzz

Tears of joy or woe?

Today, I officially started my first job at a restaurant at One Utama. This restaurant is actually based on italian fused japanese food concept and it's darn creative! I was kinda nervous an I woke up at 8.30 am. Did some laundry, had breakfast and when I looked at the time...10.24am! OMG! I'm gonna be late! The distance from my house and One U is actually around 20-25 minutes walk on a normal pace. With my bikey, it would be around 10 mins! But, I'm working till 10.30 today...so, it's kinda impossible for me to cycle back so late! So I had to walk for very very fast, and I reached there around 10.50am! Fuuh!..Rushed to the washroom, refreshed myself an went to work! 10.55am. Arrived on the restaurant!

I was briefed..and yada yada.... It was really an eye-opener. Seriously, you thought being a waitress are for the brainless..Think again! They had to jot down what the customers requested, smile to the most horrible customers, serving fast, have good focus and alertness and try to promote good food.

It's like:

reporter + actress + server + dog? + sales executive = WAITRESS

Seriously, I'm not trying to brag about myself, but that's how I felt!

I remembered, once at 9.30pm , my family and I went to Kampachi for japanese food at Pavillion. So, after we shopped, I was so darn tired and hungry that I don't even know what to order or eat. I remembered the waiter being kinda gloomy and forgetting things. And after the dinner, we were all unsatisfied with his attitude and walked out feeling angry.

Somehow, I get to relate with that old waiter. Somehow, I seem to understand that, not everyone is capable of smiling to each and everyone everyday. Not everyone is living a great life out there. It made me ponder for a second, that how much we would actually complain on someone's little mistake, and totally forgets about the many good deeds that he had done.

8.30pm. Customers were occupying the seats already. And today, I thought that I wouldn't make a mistake, but I guess God just wants to remind me not to be too high on my head.

Guy : I would like to have gomadare pasta set meal. And one iced flavoured blueberry soda.

Me: Okay. May I repeat your order. One gomadare pasta set and one iced flavoured blueberry soda.

Guy : Yup

Me: Okay, thanks. (ran off to key in the food item..and then ran back to the table)...Uhm, sorry, you haven't ordered your drinks yet, would you like ocha or plain water?

Guy: Huh??? Uhm...flavoured blueberry soda?..

Me: OMG...SORRY! >< Sorry sorry sorry..I forgot.

STUPIDDDD! Aish...luckily it's a nice couple. so, I had fun today. My colleauges consist of different nationality, some from Myanmar, one from Phillipines, and others..guess where? MALAYSIA la..duh..But overall, I really enjoyed my first day.

Eventually, when it was about 10. The engine in my head has gone haywired. I was on the verge of crying. I wasn't feeling sad, but it was more to the extremely-exhausted-until-u-need-to-cry kinda tears.

By the way, the restaurant that I'm working at is called Pasta Zanmai! Seriously, the food is GREAT! Need me to recommend some? Feel free to drop by anyday! I'll be there to serve you with a smile. Depends la siapa. "Kalau kau, boleh ba!"

Lol...miss you guys! And keep me in your prayers..I need those!

Who inspires and aspires you?

Special shoutout to those who read my last entry. I was seriously down and I'm glad to have friends like you guys! Thank you so so much!

A few days ago, I just went in for a walk-in interview at Juice Works. And then, they told me that they are going to call me the next day. So...I waited... And then, 3 days after that, (which is today) I called and ask again. They said they prefer someone who would work longer. I felt bad. I guess this is the feeling of getting turned down, eh? I mean, I thought it wouldn't be that hard to work in a juice shop. But I guess I was wrong, I think I'll go for ice-creams then, tomorrow I'll go for job-hunting again at One Utama!

Well, what happened again today, to my biggest surprise, I got an interview for the JPA scholarship. I just knew it like 2 days ago man. Seriously, my results weren't like superb, and I don't think i stand the chance to compete with the whole nation for this. I wasn't particularly happy, all I thought was "trouble" it will give me. Nothing is free in this world and after being educated, I guess I must stayback and contribute to the "Nation".

Anyway, my initial plan was to take the cab to Putrajaya which is like one heck of a far place. It's like going 4x the length of Kolombong to UMS. So yeah, it's that far. But my eldest sister decided to take a half day leave just to send me there and to ensure evrything's alright. Seriously, I thank God for a sister like that. Yesterday, I told her that everything's complete except for mom's salary slip. She answered,"I'm sorry I can't do anything for that." And then I said, "No one can do anything except Mom." She thought for a moment and continued," Well, just use mine la. I'll send you there tomorrow."

I was kinda touched that time. I've noticed that through thick and thin, she would always be there. She told me that if she were to send me there, make sure I wake up early and call her. Somehow this instilled a sense of responsibility in me to wake up early. Normally, I would have someone yelling at me telling me to wake up. But she just told me that If I really want this, I should do it on my own. "You're on your own now, you can't always depend on people.",yup that;s what she told me.

So I was late for the interview, heck, reached there around 8-ish when it was supposed to start at 8. P/S It wasn't me who woke up late ;)

Anyway, the interviewers threw a surprisingly easy question..

"Who inspires and aspires you?"

Straightaway, I thought about my dad. Yeah, like others they told about their dads too. One talked about her mother and one talked about Dr. Mani Jegathesan . Ugh, felt so blur, I was like who's that, mannn...So most of them talked about how their father had strived, from eating potatoes to walking a distance as far as 15km. And finally they succeeded, living in a good home.

My answer was...

"If you were to ask me who's my inspiration, I would say I have many. For example like Angelina Jolie. She's successful and an ambasador too. But the one who gives me the most inpiration would be from my root, which is my dad. My dad passed away 2 years ago. He was never a really successful man and he graduated at form 3. But, it was those simple things that inspire me. Just a simple Good Morning and a simple Good Night. Everytime, after school, I would be greeted with a warm smile asking how's my day? I think that's what matters the most and had given me the strength throughout this entire 18..no..16 years of my life. "

So...short! But I guess I don't need to say too much complicated things. My dad does tell me about his stories but not until the stage of eating potatoes everyday. Nevertheless, I love and missed him alot.

Purpose?

Seriously, when is this going to end? I hate staying here! I HATE IT SOOOOOOO MUCH! I wished I had a rich grandfather who just inherited me infinity sum of money. 3 months staying here, had been a tough time for me, seriously. It seems that satan successfully pulled me to the other side and I’ve just realized how cruel this world could be. Even if it’s your own family, purity never really existed. Maybe 50 years ago, when money wasn’t such a big thing, love would exist. But nowadays, everything is about money. Money matters. Given a choice, whether to have love or money, most people would rather have money, how are we gonna survive without money? Truly, love is something profound, but love can’t pay the bills, my dear. We need to be materialistic now! And, that is exactly what I want to blog about today. It really saddens and hurt me so much to realize that this happened to most of us. Perhaps, it might not be you, but I had been experiencing this excruciating pain all this while. The reason why we argued so much is because of money. MONEY. MONEY. MONEY. Have you guys ever watched some soap operas, about a large family fighting against each other over the large inheritance? Yeah, that is exactly the current situation. How people would have another “face” showing up. Trying to rub your shoes just because you’re rich, and behind your back, they start to bitch about u.  Sometimes, I really hate my life. I wished I could laugh and smile like before. Back at KK, back at school, I would just laugh at the silliest action choo make. Or even laugh at Mr. Tan’s “cold” joke. I remembered, back when I was at KK, I would thank God for each day He gave me. I would walk to school and thank God for the blue sky. I would thank God for each eventful moment he gave me.

...

But right now, all I could think of is…

"What purpose am I here for? "

"Why do I have to undergo this same thing all the time? "

"There’s gotta be more than this."

... 

I’m sick of staying here! I’m sick of staying in this materialistic world! I’m sick to realize this now! I’m sick of my family! I’m sick of everything! Please tell me, where's the love?