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| struggle..Do you ever struggle with who you are? Or, how about more of the frustration of struggling with who you ought to be? As I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep last night it dawned on me that maybe it's not either of those that I struggle with. Maybe I struggle more with trying to figure out who I am, than actually struggling with who I am. Did that make sense? It makes sense to me.
The question is, what does one do about it? Try different things until you decide, "yes, this is me." I mean, can we really ever change who we are? Or is it really "who we are" that is what I"m referring to? Certain things, that cannot be changed, maybe aide us in who we are... such as, our family, where we grew up, where we went to school (elementary, middle, high), the upbringing we had, etc. Those are things we had no control over really. I have no answers really, this is just something I've been thinking about. But, I feel as though this topic especially, if one can conquer it, will help in many other aspects of our lives. Such as our job, hobbies, the way we live, etc...
No xanga for awhile lately, lots of thoughts and other stuff going on. I've been reunited with a long lost brother whom I haven't spoken to in 7 years and my grandmother who will be 80 in November has just been diagnosed with a cancerous tumor in her galbladder, which has more than likely leaked into her liver. She is slowly dying.
Life....
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today I did something I thought I would never do. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life, as well. I was number 12839 and in choral? W that ran/WALKED the Indy 500 mini marathon. I capitalize walked because I feel like I walked a good part of it due to my sinus infection crap I'm dealing with right now. I ran at least 8 miles of it but the rest was kind of a blur. I suppose I'm glad it's over and although I didn't finish at my time goal I set for myself, I did finish. There's always next year....
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| why are people so rude?Today when I was just finished running, I was walking up the street I live on. I stopped at this cross section because a car was at the stop sign going the other way, so I let them go. I thought to myself, wow, there are a lot of people in that one convertible. Not only did they go by, but they slowed down and said something (I couldn't hear because I was listening to my iPod) and then threw a water balloon at me. Before I had time think, they drove off. I should have given them the finger, I'm sure I gave them a scowling look, amidst all their laughing. Then I said outloud, "Punkasses!" They couldn't hear because they drove off. I'm so tired I'm almost delirious but boy did I get them good... "Punkasses?"... how lame, and they didn't even hear it.
Why are people so rude?
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| Scratch my last entry. At our meeting last night they've decided to not open until the following Monday. That would April 21, 2008. So, come out then and hopefully get some good eat on! Have a lovely Thursday. I never xanga before work, kind of like it. But, then again, after work is normally when I have exciting stuff to write about. :)
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| Go get some good eat on!!!The time has come for me to look for another job. On top of the one that I have already, that is. Or, just a job for the summer since I will have the summer off from MCHS. So, I found one as a server at this new restaurant that is opening soon (next Monday actually!!!) The place is "Average Joe's Grille" and it's in the same building that "909 Grille" use to be in. I have never served before but am excited about this new endeavor. So, this is an entry to innocently (or not) promote the restaurant and to get anyone who may read this to come out and support me/tip me big!!! :) The menu is half American, half Italian and according to the owners, the cheapest prices in town on steaks, beverages, etc... It seems like it's going to be a pretty chill place to work. I'll find out Wednesday or Thursday whether or not I'm working opening day (a week from today, did I mention that yet??? :)). So, keep your eyes out for whether or not you can come support me Monday or later in the week.
Hope everyone is enjoying this amazing weather!!!
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