| Fist fights on rainy days.
I'm hurting when I'm with you, but I want to love you more, I'm blinded by what I'm looking at, I know what I'm searching for.
Now I'm running round the block, and I'm screaming out your name, though even when I'm with you, still I feel the same.
Cause nothing lasts forever, this bitter place with you. Spin me round you'll watch me suffer, Don't blink unitl we're through.
So you wanna do this, you wanna play this game. The glace that once provocted me will never be the same. again.
Im in a rare mood so I though I'd write something. I used to love to write, short stories, poems, whatever. The last few years though I kinda stopped, I'm not sure why...I think I wrote some interesting things, mostly funny, all full of bad spelling. Anyways it raining, and I got off early, I got in my first fight in oh like 10 years or something. The strangest thing I think I've ever witnessed. I was tatlking to this guy at work about baseball and we started to have what I thought was a friendly debate about baseball. I guess he didn't like what I had to say cause he started cusing me out and then grabed my shirt and made out like he was gonna hit me. Well, I'm always pretty calm and laid back, but he wouldn't back down so I grabbed him by the neck with my right arm and slammed him into a wall. My boss saw the whole thing and was trying to break us up, which is a good thing I think for both of us, cause I dont want to get suspended and I don't think he wanted to get beaten up. I guess he connected with his left, I don't remember but my face was swallon. That doesn't really bother me. What does bother me is that somehow in the ordeal I dislocated my shoulder...again. I didn't get it back into place until I was in my car. I hadn't really notcied it due to the endorphines...but I do now. The guy want's to be a cop, and he basically asulted me. I'm trying not to be that upset about it. My boss asked it I wanted to fill a report at work. I said "no", I imagine the guy must have something really deep and troubling going on inside him. Maybe his dog died before work, maybe his Grandma is sick.....I don't know, cause it wasn't his normal behavior.....not just for him, for anybody. There must be an external problem I don't now about, but I just tried to remember,"A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly." and also Colossians 3:13 "Be gentle and ready to forgive; never hold grudges. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." Crazy stuff though..
The first part of the blog was a song, well part of one that I wrote when my X and I broke up over the summer. It was a really tough time I guess that's when I tend to be the most creative. Maybe that's why I didn't write for a couple years cause there wasn't as much drama. But It been a good experience for me, I learned alot. Between Sept-Dec, I broke up with Natalie, had my Grandfather die, Had my father on Suicide watch, and had my X of only a few months get engaged to a guy she had just started dating after we went out for years. The first and last things don't bother me really all that much anymore(besides when I keep getting the info packs I ordered online from the Shane CO in June, about Engagement rings) But besides that I know it wouldn't have worked out, we didn't have enough in comman I don't think & we both had alot of growing up to do. I just feel sorry for the new dude! The other things though I think helped me out alot. It restored my faith, due to the fact I knew I could face it no other way. Although I hadn't lost faith In God I wasn't making Him a priority or fusing my Christian Walk with my every day life. It's easy to get to nowhere if you seldom read a map.
Anyways Eric and I went out last night. I love the guy. He just got a job, and starts Monday. I'm so stooked for him, noone deserves it more the he does. Eric and I, and I guess I can do this with lots of people, can spend hours on hours talking, and it seems like minutes. Never dull.
That's all I got,
Zach
Aim at heaven, and you will get earth thrown in; aim at earth, and you will get neither.- C.S. Lewis
"When in Rome!" -Will Farrell |
