One must have a mind of winter
To regard the frost and the boughs
Of the pine-trees crusted with snow;

And have been cold a long time
To behold the junipers shagged with ice,
The spruces rough in the distant glitter

Of the January sun; and not to think
Of any misery in the sound of the wind,
In the sound of a few leaves,

Which is the sound of the land
Full of the same wind
That is blowing in the same bare place

For the listener, who listens in the snow,
And, nothing himself, beholds
Nothing that is not there and the nothing that is.

--Wallace Stevens "The Snow Man"

everybody's so melancholy these days, tho, it's not like i'm not in the same boat. i'm wondering what happened to the girl who couldn't go two days without sharing her life wiht the whole xanga community. it's been some time i guess. well..here's some good news. a little update in my life...something important enough to share:

On July 7th, I decided to give up eating meat (everything except things that live in water x.x) for 40 days. why? there are a lot of things in my life that I needed to pray for..and I figured, since my mom had brought up the topic (her church was doing it), I'd give it a shot--fast something that really will make me feel it. and everytime i felt the pain, it would at least remind me to pray. so there were 2 things i really needed: an apartment, and a job for my dad.

on July 20th, I found an apartment. it'd been 13 days in...and it was an amazing event. without God, I couldn't have gotten this place.

I'm keeping hope for thing #2. keeping faith, keeping prayer. God is faithful, no matter how much i've turned away. no matter how many times i've run and refused or tried to hide..He's still there--looking out for me, watching me, taking care of me.

i'm so blessed. and half the time, i don't even know it.

so cheer up a little, ok? you're blessed too. maybe you just need to realize it alittle bit more.

motivation: the presence of God.

it's been decided. trinidad and tobego it is. =)

here's to hoping the mets sweep the diamondbacks...

and...completely upset and sad that it makes me... here's to kaz matsui...may he do well with the rockies. as long as the mets still win the world series. =D he was awesome. and he will be missed.