abyssilicious's Xanga

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 18:37:47 GMT

I'm bringing Xanga back - drop a comment if you're with me!

Monday, April 23, 2007

Mon, 23 Apr 2007 00:58:03 GMT

Man, have I had quite an experience these past few weeks. First, I get a last minute call to do Battle of the Classes, then we win and go to Battle of the Champions, then finally, the day after, Junior Prom. I can't say I haven't had a good time, because this has been probably one of the best times in high school I've ever had.

Before I've never been more accepted to be a part of a group, especially to represent a larger group. It's been surreal, and it's hard to realize that this actually happened to me. I never would've expected things like this to happen. Battle of the Classes was amazing, and even though we lost, Battle of the Champions was even better. For the rest of the team, this may have been just another event in their lives, but I hold this a little closer to me.

Prom also was a grand experience for me, even though the DJ blew, and I got seasick. The time I had when I wasn't feeling sick was phenomenal. The food was great, the people were great, and my date looked more beautiful than I could imagine. There are plenty of other things I could say about the cruise, or the date, or the people, or the food, but some just can't be put into words.

Some things have a lasting effect, some longer than others. January 10th really made a permanent effect on many lives, including mine. On Thursday, during BOTC, I led one of the "I believe" chants. I'll never be able to do it as well as James, but it was a very humbling experience. Track hasn't been the same either, and neither has daily school life. I have no other ways to further express my grief other than to simply say, "We miss you."

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Sat, 02 Dec 2006 15:43:12 GMT

Often I feel like I picked the wrong people to be friends with. It's nothing personal to them, but sometimes I'm just not like them. Athletics are very important to me, and I can't find a whole lot of people who can relate. I have never striven to be the best, I don't take AP classes unless they deal with my college career, I don't beat myself up at the sight of that B+ on my report card. My parents are laid back about my academics, and if I'm content, they're content. As a result, I've never been one to never be happy with school. Sometimes I feel like I'm just in the wrong group. I'm not that stereotypical Asian kid in all honors and AP classes, being the top of the class. I'm one that drifted away from the stereotypes, but have tried all my life to try and fit in. Regardless of what I've said in the past, I'm still ashamed of my GPA and my class rank. I do wish I had those straight A's, but who wouldn't want that? I want that 2400 on the SATs, but I know how hard it is for me. There are just plenty of times where I feel like a failure in what I do, no matter how hard I try. If I try my hardest at something, but still don't do as well as others, people will tell me "Well, you can always try harder."

Well, I can't. That's because I tried my hardest, and I still failed to meet statistics, to be better, to get remarkable grades, to fit in, to be a stereotype, and the list goes on.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Sat, 07 Oct 2006 14:06:13 GMT

I just spent the last two hours of my life going over my past.

I realized how much I've changed these past 2 years, for the better, for the worse, and everything in between. And I'm glad you reminded me of this. I'm going to try and be the person I was when you met me. I promise.

I feel the urge to apologize and tell everyone that I'm sorry for changing so much. I need to get back in touch with old friends, people I've lost.

I need to get my shit straight.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Wed, 06 Sep 2006 20:45:41 GMT

As we all (hopefully) know, summer ends today, and school starts tomorrow. That means finishing up (or even starting) your summer homework, getting those stupid supplies, and having your parents nag you to sleep early. Today's the last day of freedom, the last day to let loose, for tomorrow you may feel confined in that cell of a classroom.

But tomorrow also marks the beginnings of new things. A new school year, a new chance to prove yourself to society. Tomorrow may be one of the only chances you may get to start over, be a changed man, woman, neutered, whatever. This could be the year where you meet your goals and strive for something more, where you can't settle for any less.

I know that applies for me. This is the year where I, and many other juniors must succeed. This year is for SATs, and the year colleges will find most important. Junior year can make or break you. This is the year where I must succeed in track, or disappointment will occur. This year for us is also a pivotal year in our lives. Turning 17, getting the freedom we want.This means more travelling, getting jobs, more parties. It will test our responsibility and sensibility.

I'm going to miss this summer. It was a realization of a lot things, a chance for me to forget about some things. Some things are finally over, while some things may start again. I'm excited for what's ahead of me, minus schoolwork.

Life is meant to love and be loved.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Sun, 30 Jul 2006 02:56:58 GMT

I still worry. And I know my best friend still worries. At least we think about it the same second:

Ultrawarn01 (10:50:50 PM): where the fuck is najla
IamJustBadNews (10:50:50 PM): when do you think najla's coming back

Please come back home.

Things are starting to get better. I like summer. It lets you get away from the things you hate, and you can control who you see and what you do. You have control over your life when it comes to summer. Oh, the beauty.

What a cutie.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Mon, 24 Jul 2006 04:47:49 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjPrL3n63yg&search=Can%20dick%20hoyt

i want to do something like that.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Thu, 20 Jul 2006 03:45:26 GMT

One of my best friends is in Lebanon right now.

And it kills me more and more to know she's not home yet as the days progress.

Some things will never change

Tue, 11 Jul 2006 05:27:22 GMT

I was eating breakfast this morning, casually enjoying my breakfast half naked wearing just a beater and shorts. Just as I pay leave after paying 11 dollars on a 6 dollar meal, I notice a loud honking.

A male figure, pompously driving his overly unecessary enormous Nissan Armada, steps out of his tank of an automobile to yell at the female he is following. Why? Because she "braked too hard". He continues to yell at her about nothing, she yells back. In the middle of town, they draw attention, cursing and shouting blasphemies without regret. Somehow, these two people have the balls to yell "nigger" and "don't fucking yell at me like that" and "shut the fuck up" in front of the elderly, who can clearly hear them, or in front of little children.

Just the other day, a man was wearing a peace shirt. He was arrested while drinking a cup of coffee. Why? A cop had accused him of protesting, and sent him straight to jail for wearing that shirt.

What's going on with people these days? Maybe it's just me that thinks this, but the children of today are getting the wrong influences.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Mon, 12 Jun 2006 04:20:17 GMT

Sometimes we put up walls.

Not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to knock them down.