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| Crumbling, tumbling, trying to keep myself together.
So many expectations to live upto.
Sometimes i just feel like giving up. But i cant.
Boy, senior year is some hard stuff. | | |
| So it's pretty much been months since i've last written on xanga. If there is a single soul out there that cares, the last time i wrote, i was complaining about how stressful my life has become. Ah.. well things are still stressful, but i've learned to manage. Its all part of the learning process, my friend. So much has changed in my life since my last entry. Not only have my feet grown a whole two sizes larger (lol), but i am now officially a senior! I don't know why, but i still dont feel like a senior yet. Maybe it will hit me with a smack in the face as soon as the senior day approaches. Speaking of which, my senior portraits are on the 25th of September! Oh my god. i dont know what i'm going to wear, how i will do my hair, or anything! *silent scream* Good God, i am so excited and nervous! Haha, but i love the feeling.
The school year has started, I'm on SC and it is just fan-tab-u-lous. well, so far at least. As for classes, i really only have three real courses: AP English Lit., AP Chemistry, and AP Statistics. I love each and every one of my classes! Mr. Radice and his crazy jokes, Mr. Safe and his very sexy english accent and wild side comments, and, well, Mr. Fasciano is just plain freaky. lol The other classes are gym and music. Eh. No biggie. I pretty much own my music class, lol. I taught the kids around me all of the notes & fingerings to the the first song we learned in class, when it was the teacher's turn to teach, everybody already knew it. Lol. Boy, was she shocked or what. Ahh, good stuff.
It feels awkward at Murrow at times with the seniors gone, but then it hits me that I'm the senior now. It's my turn to shine. At this time last year, i would probably find myself dreading how life would be like without my friends. Well, over the past few months, i've learned that there is more to life than friends. Best friends? Do i have any BEST BEST BEST friend? i don't know. I really doubt it. I'm damned sure i had plenty at certain point of my life. But, if they were all that close to me, where are they now? Sure, i have a ton of extremely close friends that are fit to be considered a best friend, but, they're not there 24/7. i'm looking for that single person, that one person i can tell everything to. That one person that will update me with every change of the course of the wind. that one person, that will come over to my house and treat my house as their own. Will i ever find this person? Who knows. Ugh, but in the meantime, i'm really envying the people around me that seem to already have found that 'best friend'.
Currently, it is the month of Ramadan. Alhamdulillah, the first 2 days matched up with the Jewish observance of Rosh Hashana, so we pretty much had the first 4 days off (including weekend). I am proud to say i've fasted for each and every one of those four days so far, and i've been reading the Quran and praying most if not all 5 times. Insha'Allah the remainder of the month will continue in this pattern. 
Right before writing this, I was looking back at my old entries. It's such an eyeopener as to how much both the world around me and I , have changed. Changed for the better, of course. Except maybe my vocabulary is deteriorating, but that's probably due to the lack of study over the summer. This past summer, had to have been one of my most memorable summers. So many things went on! Family guests, Harry Potter, INTEL, summer love, melas, drama, BBQs, friends, family, Washington D.C., Virginia, movies, jokes, cricket, EVERYTHING!
I, seriously, could not have asked for more.
Wow, i forgot how good it feels to be writing in Xanga. Just the word "Xanga" alone brings back so many memories. One of the most vivid is Chadni. Uff, i miss her so much. <3
Anyways, au revoir for now.
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| Totally sick and tired of everything. Definately counting down until the end. | | |
| So Japan won Miss Universe '07. Not bad, shes pretty. India's contestant, Puja Gupta was cute too, but she only made it to the top 10 and no further.
So SATs are on Saturday, and i have not glanced at a single SAT question ever since Kaplan had ended a few months back. teachers are definately cramming everything at last minute. senior council elections! multicultural food fair on thursday! I LIVE FOR THAT DAY.
Ive got a good feeling for these last few days of school =)
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Inna lillahi wa ina'ilayhi rajioon
May Allah keep you in peace, Mama.
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