bello_mariquita's Xanga

a new place, a new beginning

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 07:12:48 GMT

ok. i've moved. it's been some time already.

if you're still interested in keeping in touch, let me know =)

greetings from sg

Fri, 20 Apr 2007 08:03:12 GMT

oh my goodness!

beens eons since i've last blogged. guess i've got bored of it. or maybe the wordsmith in me has gone on a hiatus. i think it's more the latter.

anyhow...in the time frame since i was gone, i've:

1) finished school

2) gone home for a visit

3) graduated from uni

4) went on a holiday

5) came back home.

quite a big life change i would say. and so im now officially looking for a job.

i think there's more to write. but not now.

im thinking of shifting. and when i do...i will inform you.

been a long time coming

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 12:31:48 GMT

been awhile since i've last blogged. guess i don't have much to say anymore. or maybe i've decided to be more private.

and so i've moved out of sv. im staying for summer. won't be back till *fingers crossed* april.

i dunno if im having fun. i've been working my ass off. work is most times fun. but sometimes bad. i hate being bossed ard. is it that hard to ask someone to do something nicely? i can't stand tt bitch. everytime i work with her...my blood pressure rises and she never...and i mean...never fails to piss me off.

i like to think tt im a tolerant person. but she really crosses the line. i think i must have showed her my pissed off face and she actually apologized the other day. and u know i rarely show my anger. so u can just imagine.

i am having some fun. watched russell peters last night. it was damn funny la. but then didn't really appreciate the dirty jokes he told. to be honest...i laughed coz it was funny. but on hindsight...it was low brow humour. it got me thinking. i used to get really turned off when ppl start on dirty jokes but now..look at me. i laugh along with them. doesn't really show very well of me now...does it?

the past few weeks have been tough. most ppl have left. it sucks coz..it does feel lonely here. and im not very good with loneliness. makes me blue. and im such a wuss at times. i try to be strong but then...sometimes it's just not that easy.

but i've been spending fair bits of time with ppl who are gonna leave soon or have left by the time i blog this. thank you so much for you. all of you. sigh. what will i do without them? i miss the witty conversations and company...the comfort and support they give when i cant go on anymore. all so sorely missed/going to be missed. sometimes i wonder why did i sign myself up for this and i have to keep reminding myself of the reasons why.

have to try and stay focused and stay the course. and yes. i've rung the driving instructor.

and i think good listeners are an endangered species.

i'm against gay marriages

Tue, 17 Oct 2006 04:15:44 GMT

just watched oprah and she featured James McGreevey, the disgraced NJ governor who was accused of a gay sex scandal. he has just written an autobiography on his wretched life.

man. this episode of oprah really pissed me off. but first, let me give u some background into this guy. he was married with 2 children, opposed gay marriages in his time as governor before he was accused of some 'corruption'...with the bigger focus on his scandal. so, he was a closet gay.

and now, he has come into the open. he is in the process of divorcing his wife and has found himself a 'life partner' and is advocating gay marriages, saying that gay relationships need to be acknowledged by the society and is for the greater good of the public as it enriches the fabric of society. and has very supportive parents and was and still is attending church. he even went as far as to say in the show tt 'this is God's grace to me'.

and...what about the hurt he has caused his ex-wife? his children?

what on earth! God loves gays. He loves everyone. but He condones sin. homosexuality is a sin. no doubt about it. there's no grey area. sin is sin. i know some people are attracted to the same sex but if you are a christian, the only way to run away from this sin is abstinance and just a dying of your desires. tough call. but i have known of people who have triumphed over this. and they are living a very different lifestyle now.

the very fact that he is advocating what he did just made me so angry. how can someone be so blind to sin? how can they knowingly live in sin? how can they think that homosexuality is acceptable in God's sight?

has christianity been so whitewashed and so accepting that even sin is being embraced by the church right now? there was a bit of a hooha a couple of years ago when the anglican church in America and England wanted to allow gay marriages. the South East Asian anglican churches opposed the move. i can't remember if any other churches opposed the move. what do we make out of this? how do we let truth shine in such dark times?

to be honest, it scares me. the way the world has become around me. what kind of a difference will i make?

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Sun, 15 Oct 2006 06:36:53 GMT

all over the place.

that's how i am right now.

struggling to keep it in when all i wanna do is get it out.

farther and further away i slip.

maybe this is it.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Tue, 10 Oct 2006 14:35:34 GMT

the crazy week has passed. and all's rosy now. almost. just almost.

there's so much to thank God for.

sometimes i wonder if it's just mere coincidences. or is it divine appointments. i know that mere coincidences don happen. so it must be the latter.

funny how life sometimes take potshots at you. makes u do a double take and wonder what's up...just what on earth is going on. i wish i knew. but as the old saying goes...curiosity kills the cat. so i shd just let the cat live and let curiosity die a slow death or let revelation unveil itself.

just watched "the devil wears prada". loved the stuff in it. think it pushed my materialistic button. but the storyline wasnt anything to shout abt. but i do wanna read the book now.

just some short notes to keep me on top of things:

call. airport. petrol station. misnomer. taka. ann siang. cbd. strawberry and fudge sundaes. home-cooked food. wine. chocolates. movies. skype.

so much! growl. and tt's not even everything i need to get round to.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 14:33:28 GMT

my head is currently spinning and my temp's rising. sigh...im running a temp again. my highest yet (meaning this year). sigh. i think age has finally caught up with me. could be due to the fact tt i got caught in the rain...and a sore...sore lack of sleep coz i was busy copying notes. boo. i need slp. slp will make it all better. it always does.

but before that...a couple of things i wanna write. which may not interest you.

easy come, easy go. i've come to realise how true that statement is. especially in terms of relationships. you have those that last a lifetime. those that survive a season. and those that last as long as a shooting star. the relationships forged over time, common ground, mental stimulation and those (rare) quarrels/disagreements seem to last a lifetime.

what good is mourning? on one hand, it allows you to truly grieve for a death. but on the other...it brings to mind those beautiful memories that were. making it all the more painful, all at once. you can shove it to the backburner but time and tide will wash it ashore sometime. and when it does, the pain seems so much sharper and unbearable. sometimes don't you think a memory eraser like that in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind is a fantabulous invention? but it will never be possible. coz memories of a person never live in isolation. it's always linked to some other parts of your life.

currently on repeat: When did you fall - Chris Rice

i love. pure, simple, sweet. a hope deferred. but i shall still press on. when the heart begins to doubt, my mind needs to believe and my will steeled in the knowledge that my God is faithful and awesome.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 14:06:06 GMT

i've recovered! =)

thank you all who have gone out of your way to make sure i'm alrite =) the porridge, the cheng tng, the cold/flu remedy, the visits, the prayers. thank you! u made my recovery so much speedier with all that lovin' ;)

in the blink of an eye, the study break has almost ended. and the initial plan to get HEAPS of studying done, did not follow through. instead it's been a week filled with work, more retail therapy and even more fun. dined out at far away places, fancy places and downright good food places. need to do detox tmr. and actually get some studying done.

celebrated many birthdays this month and bode farewell to 2 well-loved cg mates. this month has been one of highs and new lows. i guess this is a part and parcel of life. there's always a time and season for everything. for those who have crossed a milestone this month, may our good Father in heaven bless and keep each of you, for you matter so much that He made something beautiful to cross your path each day, that your days may be filled with joy and a renewed sense of His love, grace and mercy. =)

i look back now and maybe it's fading. the wound that was left gaping has been slowly healed by unwitting persons. i look back yet again and realised that maybe some of the magic is gone as well. the stardust has fallen from my eyes, and i think i'm seeing clearly for the first time....in a long, long while. though a part of me still wishes for more...

Friday, September 22, 2006

Fri, 22 Sep 2006 15:14:34 GMT

it started with a sore throat. a slight temperature. and a little cough.

drank water, took multivitamins, extra dosage of vitamin c, lo han kuo drink, effervescent tablets to relieve symptoms of cold and flu.

fought back the sore throat and temperature. hooooray for me....until....

i got caught in the rain. caught a chill as well coz i only wore a shirt. trust me to do that. the weather's been really unpredictable recently. sunny in the morning. turning all grey and wet as the afternoon swings round.

and now...it has escalated to a dripping nose.

but u know what? this is the first time i've fallen sick since returning to perth =) not bad hey? hee. will get well soon. pray for me will you?

feeling very blessed. thanks to all who asked how i'm doing and going that extra mile for me. i really appreciate it =)

this semester has been treating me well, from the minor to the major. all thanks and glory goes to Him. i stand amazed at what You have given/shown/taught me.

and thank you to all those who've been near and dear recently. for being there. for being honest. for indulging me at times. but never forgetting to shine a light on reality. i love you dearly. simply cause.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Mon, 18 Sep 2006 13:21:43 GMT

i think i mite have become lactose intolerant. or maybe i'm just a hyperchrondriac.

but currently...i think it's only milk tt's doing it for me.

and i think im falling sick. not funny. swallowing takes abit of effort now. sigh. i hate sore throats. i do. need to do water parade tmr if i dun wan this to escalate into a full-fledged sore throat. admittedly....im really not drinking the recommended 8 glasses of water a day. (i can see miss_hairy glaring at me rite now....)

i think tt's all im willing to write for now. i shall go and drink some water now and get some rest.