ben_ha_meen's Xanga

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Wed, 19 Dec 2007 07:10:49 GMT

This world is really rather silly. There is so much to say, yet, saying something ceased to matter decades ago. We have the unprecedented ability to broadcast the issues we want to talk about, but our talking about issues matters less now than ever before. Shame isn't it?

Genocide and Psyco Baptists

Fri, 28 Sep 2007 15:31:53 GMT

I think the freakpsycos from the GodHatesFags church in Wichita are going to be on campus today. Nothing caps off a week of "Genocide Awareness" like a good old fashion FagBash. DigiCam please!

Where is the Outrage?

Wed, 26 Sep 2007 20:08:01 GMT

Warning Sign:

Larry King: Vice President Gore said that: "If you lopped off the top 1% that
            you are giving tax relief ... you could pay for the cost of every
            other program."

Bush: "Oh, I don't -- you know, I hadn't -- I'm not so sure. I'm not quick in
      my mind at math, but I don't believe in trying to pick and choose
      winners when it comes to tax relief."

George W. Bush
September 26, 2000
Appearing on CNN's Larry King Live.

-+-

Maybe I'll make this a series. There have been oh so many.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Tue, 25 Sep 2007 20:15:28 GMT

Statement of the year:

"Taser this....FUCK BUSH."
- The Rocky Mountain Collegian (Student Newspaper at Colorado State University) Editorial 9/21/2007

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Tue, 25 Sep 2007 06:51:41 GMT

This is great:

Don't question this Benjamin Joseph Buscher. Figure out what you want... and without questioning your friends, or even yourself, just do what makes you happy. Weird things happen. This is one of those things. And no one will make sense of it except for you.
Sincerely -Your best friend (Karma)

This is also great:

Two great things in one day.

Three Months.

Mon, 10 Sep 2007 07:19:40 GMT

Three Months. Not lyrics from the best track on My December. The amount of time (roughly) between today, and the day I finish college.

Sweet.

*fuck.*

Two and One Half Months until I begin to recieve greeting cards with pictures of birds, lighthouses, and shooting stars, with ghastly messages about "spreading my wings," and "embarking on the journey of life".

Two months until I fall to pieces in a wild fit of anxiety and skip all of my classes while drowning all sorrow in $3 bottles of Cabernet and dozens of boxes of Sour Patch Kids.

One month until reality sets in, and I accept the sick inevitability of what is certain to be complete and utter failure beyond all measure.

Two weeks until I remember that I hate school work and want desperately to clutch that silly vinyl diploma holder in my quivering, nail-bitten mitt and dash off to my party where I'll cry if I want to.

One day before I complete the 14th from the last Monday morning ritual of oversleep-speedtoclass-overcaffinate-afternoonjitters-freakout-crash.

This is going to be a trainwreck. But it might be shockingly successful. But it will probably be a trainwreck.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 02:33:48 GMT

I stumbled upon a little metaphor this afternoon. I decided that our little gay community is kind of like a snow globe. Shake us up as many times as you want, we will land in the same place we began. This little cycle of hook-ups/break-ups/fuck-ups/scabes truly tends to be alarmingly predictable, and generally boring in nature. In the end, it seems that all one can hope for is the prospect of hopping out of this damp little niche and realizing that there is in fact, much, much more.

Yo soy triste.

Fri, 12 Jan 2007 03:35:45 GMT

No me gusta Espanol.

Release

Tue, 24 Oct 2006 18:52:58 GMT

God it feels good to let everything go once in a while. Just recede into contemplative contentment. Give up on reason. Realize that logic is most often illogical. Focus on something simple and clearly defined like class, a paper, or book. Abandon all that is confusing to push aside confusion. Bliss.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 06:23:03 GMT

I was struck by an interesting idea today. What if some of my insecurities...or maybe a better word would be fears, were created not by an obsession of what others think of me or view me as I am, but by an interest in what the reaction would be if I was suddenly gone. It's sounds sort of dark, but I'm not talking about death or injury or anything...just gone. People around here seem to handle life without former friends and acquaintances fairly easily. Truthfully speaking, friendships disintegrate all of the time and while never being completly forgotten, are generally quickly replaced. While some of these situations are obviously for the better, some seem to be the result of 'losing touch', and more frequently for me, they happen when someone moves away. The strongest ties in my experience are those that withstand distance, and I am fortunate enough to still be close to a number of people who have moved on from this place. Terrifying as it sometimes seems, my own time to move on is quickly approaching. In little more than a year from now, I will be starting my first "real" job in a city hundreds of miles away, and I will probably never return except for the occasional visit. Who will I still be in touch with two years from now? Or five years?

An old friend (coincedentally enough), through recent events advised me to be a little more selective with my "people filter" ...meaning I should be more careful in choosing the people I put my trust and confidence in. Great advice is often very simple, and this example is no different. I took it to heart. I don't think anyone should quit monitoring quality when it comes to friends--I certainly feel like I have removed myself from associating with a select few out of bare necessity to retain respect for myself--but it does make me wonder if I have let some good ones fall through the cracks we call 'losing touch'. I can think of people who I have lost touch with who live hundreds of miles away, yet for the most part, they live within a few miles. For me, people are lessons, experiences, and memories. For me, people are life, and the prospect of missing out on the good ones is a little sad.

Just a thought I had while walking through campus today.

-Benjamin Joseph