well, today i have tried to be everything

it never works

like a transparent costume, i lie to myself everyday, hoping that one day i can convince myself that you love me. If you do, then why dont i ever see it? why do i continue to lie to myself thinking that you give a damn? its all just mush

Currently Listening Welcome To The Monkey House By Dandy Warhols see related

yes, so today was great, until i talked to her

i take an offer i like to have, and i get run over

why am i always crushed by you?

i cant take the blambe anymore, and i am very frustrated

i hate being confused, but it seems every time or chance i have of talking to you or trying to fix a problem you make the outcome is either making me look like a brat or a feeble loser, trumbling under the hand of the manipulator.

if i stand up to you, im shunned, if i follow in your lead, im mocked. there is nothing left to do but cry, for i have nothing left in my body to offer you.

my love is just not enough anymore, but i dont think it ever was

Currently Listening Mutations By Beck see related

Welcome back bethany,

i like this because no one will ever come to this site to read my complaints. Xanga has become my refuge, where i can pour out my sadness and i will recieve no comment. I can talk about how very sad i am all the time, and how i cannot stand my position in the world.

i cry over the happiest things

i smile when i really want to crumble

i have no voice, and all ears are turned to the sweet sound of others, not my bitter ooze that is lightened with apathy

i embrace my welcome, for it is the only open arms i have

Currently Listening Extraordinary Machine By Fiona Apple o sailor see related

I went to school

wnet to work

saw kristi

went home

i love xanga..everyone gets to read this