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bky87
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Name: Becky
Country: United States
State: Louisiana
Metro: Monroe
Birthday: 7/19/1987
Interests: love God. enjoy life. love Brett Ryne, of course. fascinated by the human mind (weird, i know). love dancing... straight from the heart. good music is one of God's greatest gifts to this world... mostly late 90's is the best to me. goo goo dolls and such. love red roses. love the beach. love laughing. love coffee houses... it's the atmosphere, i think. really enjoying psychology this semester. starting to love winter. watching soccer games in really cold weather is always great. i like soccer, but i'm no good at it. love Christmas... wait for it every year. everyone's so happy then. love making people smile. love making people think.
Expertise: dancing and "counseling"... in the context of helping people with problems. hmm... not too much here.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Medical
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  dancegyrl71987
Member Since:
7/6/2005
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| God is at work. Always.
So much is falling into place... I'm watching it happen to people around me. It's so exciting to see God working in the lives of friends that mean so much to me. They are so happy and at peace with everything. I don't believe in coincidence... and these people have handed over their situations to allow God to handle them. And now they're happy. I love it when God proves Himself to be glorious. My prayers for them and theirs for themselves are being answered. God's taking action... their hearts must finally be ready for it. Oh this is just so exciting!
God is good.
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| So I had completely forgotten that I actually enjoyed xanga.
Christina brought something to my attention that I've been trying to place a finger on for a few months. (Thank you!) She called it "crossroads" but I dunno. It's just weird to one day wake up and realize that you've grown up... for the most part. To realize that... well, high school is over. And those friends you had, well some will change or disappear... and the ones that matter most will stick around. It's a reality of life that people lose touch. One that you don't want to face ever, but you end up facing it anyway. But there is this reassurance you have when you've been hanging out with old friends for the first time in a long time that some things never change. And those are the things that keep friendships alive.
My sister will be a senior in high school next year. She already ordered her class ring, actually. And as we filled out the order form, I looked down to realize that I was still wearing mine. Brett told me just the other day that he wishes he would have gotten one now. And of course I said I told you so... but then I realized that maybe the reason he wishes that is because he's realizing the same thing as me... high school is something that was fun while it lasted... and then it was over. Neither of us really have any desire whatsoever to go back to those days... none at all except to be with those people again. Not all of them, just the ones we genuinely enjoyed the company of and probably will never be together with all of them again. I find myself talking about them every now and then. And it's kinda sad... and happy at the same time. I mean... all we ever wanted was to grow up.
Because growing up would mean we were that much closer to our future, right? But our future is tomorrow. Or an hour from now. Funny how high school prepares you for your future so much that you forget to enjoy the present sometimes. Speaking of future... Brett and I celebrated our four year anniversary on the 21st of this month. Which means there is only (haha) three more years till we can finally get married. And every year I look back and think, "I can't believe it's been a whole year since the last anniversary." I guess I don't realize how quickly time flies, especially in college when all you do is study and work and stay busy. I am sad to say that next year when we celebrate five years, I will probably say the same about this one coming up. I don't want to miss my whole life waiting for the future to arrive, and I'm afraid I will even though I'm aware of this.
My dad retired the day after my four year anniversary... When did he get old? I don't suppose he's really all that old. 53 isn't bad for a retiring age. He had the years invested in GM to be able to do it. But now he doesn't know what to do with himself. He says all he wants to do right now is be a daddy, which is something he feels like he's missed out on the past five years he spent living in Shreveport during the week and coming home on weekends. I don't feel like I've been deprived of anything... he did the best he could to be involved when he could be home. But of course, he still feels guilty and probably always will. He seems so happy now, though. I can tell by just being around him. He laughs more, and plays with the dogs more, and even notices more... more of the little things that I no longer pay much attention to. I'm happy for him.
In high school we had this idea of how everyone's life would pan out. I have always been the girl who would be first to get married. Because I was always the committed one. (Some things never change.) On the other hand, the two who seemed the most distant from settling down now have received promise rings from their boyfriends for Christmas. And their boyfriends are wonderful to them and to their friends, and I could not be happier for them. And they could not be happier for themselves, and that is wonderful. They both deserve it so very much. So not what we expected! But it's good. I, on the other hand, will probably be married after both of them because my degree I'm going for (Speech/Language Pathologist) has a Master's attached to it, and for nothing more than our own sanity and financial reasons, Brett and I will probably have to wait a little longer. We won't wait until I'm done... that would be way too long. But we will wait. I've always been told I have way too much patience.
The "future" years when Brett and I will be married have been weighing heavily on my mind for a while now. Even though it seems so far away, based on what I've said earlier it really is not. That in itself is mind-blowing to me. We will only live here for a little while- long enough for me to finish my Master's program, and then move off for Brett to attend seminary. Neither of us have ever lived anywhere but here. Our families have begun to celebrate holidays together (so weird but so right at the same time). Brett's grandmother said to my parents that she considers me a part of their family already. I smiled. I realized that eventually our parents will become grandparents, and when they do we probably will not live close to them... which is something I never really thought about before. I've started thinking about what our kids will be like... let me tell you it interests me more as I think about it. We've already decided what we want their names to be and that we want a boy and a girl. And in that order. Which is scary to me because the last thing I want is to be disappointed because we created this perfect family in our minds already, and we shouldn't have... but we did. You can never completely silence the desires of your heart, I don't think. We want a border collie, too. And I want to be a very involved pastor's wife. Some part of me has always wanted that, even before I knew Brett. I would love to do a lot with children's programs... but I'm scared about how much time my job will consume. Growing up is scary business. People always tell you to take your time growing up, but you never realize how much they mean that until you are starting to fit into their shoes.
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| This summer has been so good to me... and it's not even over yet. I didn't realize how much I needed it until it got here.
Besides working a lot when I'm home, I've staffed two camps at Caney. C.C.E. and Grace Camp. Both of which were wonderful experiences yet again this year. Grace Camp went better this summer than ever before, and it was so much fun getting to staff C.C.E. for the first time. On a slightly different note, I had my wisdom teeth out the Wednesday after C.C.E. and they gave me trouble all the way into the first half of Grace Camp three weeks later. Doctor says some people just take longer than others for the pain to start receding... I think I'm the longest in history. 
We're already turning in fall schedules at work... summer has gone by so quickly. But I am looking forward to this fall semester. I don't have quite as difficult classes... or so I think... and I'll be able to work more during the week. I love working at my job, especially during the school year. And hopefully I'll have a little more time to myself. I will have to study a good bit, but nothing like I did for A&P last semester... and the one before. I am excited to start my first communicative disorders classes this semester. It feels like I'm finally beginning to study something that will be significant in my life. I see some of the speech therapists come in and work with our kids at work. Their job looks like so much fun, I just want to sit in and watch the whole time. But I'm in charge of 15 kids in the other room so that won't work. I'm very excited about my future as of right now. 
Brett and I have grown stronger than ever yet again this summer. No surprise there. We were at C.C.E. on our 3 and 1/2 year anniversary. He got one of our friends on staff to serenade me with him at dinner one night where he gave me a dozen peach roses, and he got one of the girls on staff to make me a "cake" out of cupcakes that said "I ♥ U -Brett" in the shape of a flower. I'll just put a picture up later cause that's hard to imagine. But needless to say, I felt special that night at camp. 
Brett took me out to eat at a nice restaurant for my 19th birthday, and we shared the biggest chocolate dessert I've ever seen. Then we went to Walmart for lack of better things to entertain ourselves by. That was fun. The next day was my sister Laura's 16th birthday so we had this huge group thing that night, with her friends and mine, and ate way too much pizza and cookie cake. But there's no better way to do it than to eat too much! We all talked about all the memories we had and laughed harder than I have in a long time. It was great.
We've started a new dance at church that I'm really looking forward to doing in August. I think it will be beautiful. "Who Am I" by Casting Crowns. We are really enjoying dancing together again, especially since school kinda tears us apart during the year. Summer is the only time we have anymore to dance.
For Brett's 19th birthday on August 5th, we're taking a trip up to Little Rock to spend the weekend with his brother and his girlfriend. I'm looking forward to that a great deal. Arkansas is so pretty and I enjoy being around Stevie and Jeanine. It kinda makes Brett and me seem a little closer to normal.  hahaha No, they're just really cool people. The next weekend I'm going to Oklahoma to visit some close friends of my family's who moved up there a few years ago. It will be nice to see that family again... they also are very good people. So my summer has been packed with stuff to do... but relaxing at the same time. I've enjoyed it so much.
I suppose this is the update for the entire summer... I guess I took a break from everything the past couple months. But there's no harm in that, it was much needed.
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| Ahhhhhhhh.......................................................... 
Summer.
So nice to not have to worry about school anymore, except of course for finding out what my grades are. I saw a very dear friend of mine for the last time in a while today. Ben Kay from my church is moving to Connecticut... and today was his last Sunday there. But I hope we will be keeping in touch. Ben is an awesome person, and will be dearly missed.
Today being Mothers' Day, I thought a lot about my grandma (dad's mom) who passed away about four years ago. She was probably the most intelligent woman I've ever known, and the only real Christian influence in my life... I realized in church today how much that meant to my life... and how much I miss her. I'm gonna call my grandkids "Sugar" because of her... that's what she always called me. 
We went out to Logan's to eat with my other grandma. Now I'm full... too full. And Brett and I are about to do something... something relaxing without having to worry about preparing for school tomorrow. That will be nice. I think I want ice cream. And to watch Tristan and Isolde. Yeah..............
I'm looking forward to seeing my friends graduate this week... and then to going to the river on Saturday with the big group of us and my dad. Love summer. Can't wait. Oh wait, I don't have to! It's here finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Life is amazing. | | |
| I only wish I had more time to update this thing. My life is awesome right now, but OH so busy. I am doing well in school... which is not a completely new thing to me... but after last semester, it's a nice thing to be able to say. A&P is still killing me though... and that probably won't change. I'm at the NCM right now, where a great deal of my time is spent. There are four places I am during the week: school, NCM, work, and studying at home. And usually in that order daily. The routine is getting a bit old. And I am more ready for summer than I ever have been in my life. Yeah... I never thought I would say that after high school graduation. But here I am, saying it again. Erica's coming home in a couple of weeks for her spring break. And of course I am VERY excited about that!!! Brett and I are going just south of Baton Rouge on April 7th to be an "example couple" at a high school retreat that will be focused on relationships and spiritual reasons why you should wait to have sex until marriage.  Can you believe it? We are gonna be an example for kids... some not even a whole year younger. What couple would not be completely honored and surprised at being asked to do that?! And the man who asked us to do it thinks I would make a good counselor for some of the teens there whose pasts are similar to mine. I am amazed at how God uses every situation for good. Our relationship being a prime example.
I think I realized yesterday how physically drained school can make me. I found myself falling asleep more than once yesterday... and that was after a power nap. And when I'm awake it is like I still have no energy and can't wait to go back to sleep. So unlike me. I'm ready to have the time to be well rested. Even my weekends are packed full of stuff to do. Like study. I miss my friends, miss hanging out with people I know who are still in high school who probably think I've just completely been a jerk since school started.  And there are lots of friendships, even here in school with me who understand the stress of college, that I know I need to spend more time on keeping those friendships the way they are. It's is so unbelievably hard to do!
So yeah, that's pretty much my life for the past few months... wishing the next few months would hurry up and get over with. And that's sad, nobody should live their life more for the future than the present. Or be put in a situation where they want to, at least. But I know I am definitely not the only college student who feels that way. So at least I'm not alone.
Enough for now, gotta go to class. Again.
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