Return to Innocence

Starts with Love,
Devotion, Feeling...Emotions..

Don't be afraid to be weak,
Don't be too proud to be strong

Look into your heart my friend
That'll be your return to yourself
A return to innocence

If you want, then start to laugh
If you must, then start to cry
Tell yourself don't take
Just believe in destiny
Don't care about what people say
Just follow your own way
Don't give up and use the chance
A return to innocence

*edit..finished

A young girl dances with joy
As she catches the brides bouquet
Another girl silently weeps
as she watches her husband pass away
a father buy's his son a new bike
and watches him ride it with glee
Another mother holds her child tightly
As they slowly starve on the street

It's not easy to see
The stories left untold
But it's easy to say
that you didn't know
open your eyes and look
read the stories
that's unwritten in the book

Someone cries themselves to sleep
Listening to the falling rain,
The razor slashes leave a broken smile
As they slowly go insane
A proud mother stands and claps
as her son walks on to stage
Her heart melts as he says
It was you that help me graduate

There's a smile in every lie
A little child behind your eyes
He will lay your burden down
What was lost, is now found
open your eyes and look
read the stories
that's unwritten in the book

Been on a writing frenzy lately..
not sure why..

How do you tell someone you believe
When the words spoken are incomplete
How do you smile directly into their face
When your heart is out of place
How do you show some one you care
When you're afraid to leave yourself bare
It's just a little hard
To wish upon a star
It's just a little sad
When she doesn't wish it back

Out on the open highway
With the lanes passing by so fast
There's nothing else to worry
Nothing else in the past
There's no one there to see
There's no place to run
It's like i'm a shadow
Made invisible by the sun

How do you let yourself go
When you can't bear it anymore
How do you pretend you don't care
When even flowers smells sweet like her hair
How do you make yourself believe
When you can't see what she see's
Here comes the pain again
Washing up from the heart
Making myself pretend
That I'm not falling apart

Out on the open highway
With the lanes passing by so fast
There's nothing else to worry
Nothing else in the past
There's no one there to see
There's no place to run
It's like i'm a shadow
Made invisible by the sun

------------------------------

Never had much problems
Expressing my words in rhyme
Always been a soldier
Trudging through this life of mine
I was never afraid to take a risk
To put my heart on the line
But things always happen
I met a girl, so sexy and fine

Her first impressions caught me breathless
With her soft hair and a smile nice and warm
She told me about her belief's and future dreams
As she rested peacefully in between my arms
I never said too much,
Only spoke when it mattered
Just wanted to make her feel special
Just want her to smile when she felt flattered

Over time I felt myself slipping
I enjoyed losing myself in her eyes
I began to feel my heart warming
When I knew the timing wasn't right
It felt like I had all to lose and nothing to gain
I wasn't even sure if she felt the same

So I can only do the things I can do
Hold her in my arms and keep her smiling
Do what I can to keep her heart from breaking
Just keep on holding and protect her heart
Even if it breaks me and tears me apart
I never said too much,
Only spoke when it mattered
Just wanted to make her feel special
Just want her to smile when she felt flattered

I'm going to recount a little experience of mine. It's sort of a bittersweet moment...

It involves the love of my life...

my car.

As most of you know, I had my car put into the bodyshop a little 4 weeks ago. Among this time I was convinced I was never going to see my car ever again. Never did I think that a paint job and body kit moulding would ever take this long. So finally, last Tuesday I drove myself up there with a good friend of mine to take a look at it. The car was sitting there, painted however, still missing the pearl white and needed some serious detailing. There were serious drip marks everywhere and the rubber weather stripping were all ripped off. The owner needed me to pick it up today since he's losing his shop. That at least explained why the car was there for such a long time. Feel bad for the guy. He apologized to me saying that it looks like with the amount of detailing it needed, it was better for me to pick it up the next day. At this point, I rolled up my sleeves, picked up the tools and went "no..I'll help you get it prepped and ready to go by tonight" I worked on my car with him for 8 hours straight. The car is not even properly detailed yet..still needs so much work..however this is not the kicker of my experience....

While I was installing the door panels back on to my car..I noticed there was another crack in the middle of my dash..and the crack I had fixed was reopen again. I looked again and my deck was missing. I asked Paul (the owner) where it was. He looked at it...got a very weird look on his face and immediately asked his brother where the deck could be. His brother looked...looked inside the car..looked around the shop..put his hand to his head and yelled out "F*CK!!" .......

I of course was feeling a bit uneasy...

Paul then looked around the car again...shaking his head and looked up to his brother "Dude..where are his keys?"

I was feeling scared now...

After looking around, we found an imprint of my key on a car hood that they had apparently oversprayed. The key was there..someone had taken it...

I was feeling quite aggitated...

I sat in my car..and looked for anything that might be missing....my lights were there...my books..cd case..I flipped down my back seat..my speaker box..wires...wires cut.."umm...why are my wires cut.." looking around again "um...where is my amp?"..
my amp was missing...

I was feeling sick to my stomach now...

At this point..Paul flipped out and checked through all his other cars in the garage. Turns out an integra's keys were also missing. Not good...

You know what was the kicker? I looked through the change compartment of my car...all my coins where missing..yes..he took my coins. You wanna know what's sad? THIS PERSON TOOK ALL MY CHANGE AND LEFT ONLY PENNIES!!

I made him call a lock smith. Got the key remade. Finished the rest of the detailing. Got into my car..drove home and locked my car in my garage.

My baby is home.

Bittersweet..I know..she's sexy..but...*sigh* why..why..

at least Paul will get me a new deck and new amp.

I told him not to worry about the change...

Gotta get out..

feel so constricted...

yet..I know I have to hold on and beat it

I have to see things through..even though I dont want to, even when my will has already given out.

I don't even know what its running on anymore..what kind of fuel is still driving me along this unimaginable long journey.

What lays ahead of me is nothing but a dim light...what lays inside me is nothing but a heart that beats quietly and din.