blurthelines's Xanga Site

I don't remember one jump or one leap...	...just quiet steps away from your lead

blurthelines
read my profile sign my guestbook Name: Natalie State: Illinois Metro: Chicago Birthday: 6/28/1983 Gender: Female Interests: dinosaurs, music, photography, friendship and ice cream Occupation: youth pastor Industry: all the profit Message: message meEmail: email me AIM: natheartsdinos Member Since: 10/23/2003

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Sunday, February 04, 2007

i think i'm done on xanga...maybe that's a lie and i'll come back in a few months or something.
but i started blogging through google and really like it.

so you can read my new blog at
http://natheartsdinos.blogspot.com/

if you care. it's mainly me just babbling about things but i try to update it a lot.
i'll still check my subscriptions since i like to know what's going on in peoples lives.

peace out...go bears.

1:16 PM - 6 eprops - 3 comments - email it

Monday, January 22, 2007

reflections on today...

1. i would recommend trying to become a therapist to anyone who is afraid their ego is getting just a tad too big. today i got yelled at by a client for there not being enough parking in evanston, il. thank goodness she was right and had realized I built the city plan and constructed the city myself just to allow for an occasion to make her drive around forever and not find a spot and be 25 minutes late to the session, unlike her normal 17minutes. she also proceded to tell me i short change her on time.

who doesn't love therapy?

2. i was watching scrubs tonight for a brief while during my evening meal. zach braff's character was reflecting on relationships and he was frustrated and lonely that he didn't have one. so about mid-way through the show he goes on a rant at everyone else who's been complaining and moaning about the crap they deal with in relationships...and he tells them that they're so caught up in the stupid stuff they're not appreciating the fact that they have each other.

it struck me because i probably find myself in the alone boat more of the time in relationships...but it doesn't mean that i would trade my singleness for a crappy relationship. and granted, every relationship takes work and isn't butterflies and rainbows everyday...but if it's not pleasant at all...what is the point.

i dunno, i guess i just got this "take what you can get and be happy, at least you're not alone" vibe from it. and i was annoyed.

3. my classes this semester are hard. they're very thick/dense with material. which makes the reading for them hard as well because it's really chock full of learning...or big words. one of the two. plus one class is research and i'm not going to lie, researchers don't write their papers (or textbooks) to entertain the masses. probably not to entertain anyone. so that's fun.

4. youth group has been going really well for my high school group. i'm still working on the junior highers. they're rambunctious to say the least.

5. i have to go accomplish things now.

8:21 PM - add eprops - add comments - email it

Monday, January 01, 2007

so this is the new year...

i'm not going to lie...i think new years is a stupid holiday. or at least to the extent that people force themselves awake to watch a ball tumble in the sky. i'm all about having fun, but not to the extent that people go crazy or insist on having amazing plans for new years. it's just never done it for me as a holiday.

that being said...this new years was quite pathetic by most party standards...but quite enjoyable by my own. i saw the pursuit of happyness w/ my mom and then she took me grocery shopping...which was amazing because i bought all sorts of good stuff for lunches for school and yummy snacks. then i went home and had pizza with my family and watched the bears game until it became too painful. then i headed home around 8:45ish. i unpacked groceries, reorganized some cabinets, threw away yucky food and generally cleaned the kitchen. all while listening to rosie thomas. most enjoyable...mainly because not only do i feel accomplished when i clean and organize...but it puts my mind at more ease for the few days or weeks that it stays clean. then i grabbed some sparkling grape juice and watched a couple noomas to figure out what i wanted to use for youth group. i also worked on church nametags.

lame? perhaps. but when i tumble into bed tonight i'll be happy. and that's all that really matters. i've been trying to live that way more lately. doing what i want to do...or even more importantly what i need to do. although i do find myself slipping into alone-ness more and more often. i like it...i'm kind of tired of working at friendship to some extent. which i'm not sure is good. though i'm almost positive that i would never stay very long in a stage of not actively/constantly seeking friendship.

to put it honestly, i'm just kind of tired and unfulfilled of friendship that is random and every 3-6 months. it's just hard to open up and really share what's going on in life. plus, i'm just more connected to the people who are closer or make more effort because they get to see me live life each day. life after college is different. friendship is work.

i'm just tired lately. i function better with routine than without. i'll be glad for school to start again, but only for the schedule and the friends...not the hardcore quarter we supposedly have.

this week is a busy one. on top of that, i'm trying contacts and it is a big endeavor. it makes my eyes really tired and i get loopy/grumpy. it's really not that fun...but i'm working on it. medieval times at the end of the week so that's pretty fun.

happy new year.

12:26 AM - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Monday, December 25, 2006

top five things i'm feeling/thinking right now
1. christmas was fabulous
2. i love my family and friends
3. i feel overwhelmed in a negative way
4. what am i doing with my life
5. why can't everything just slow down

and two more
6. why does the feeling have to fade
7. why can't i ever say no?

it's 11:30 and my downstairs neighbors just got home and they're making so much noise that i might just go on a rampage of fixing/organizing and putting my stuff away. why did christmas have to end with me being over tired and over whelmed?

11:29 PM - add eprops - add comments - email it

Friday, December 22, 2006

*2006: A Year in Review!*
Quick review
Overall was it a good year?:	mos def.
Name one thing you would change about 2006::	i would've traveled more this summer
Your biggest mistake in 2006::	not confessing my love for Jim from The Office
Your biggest success in 2006::	getting into Northwestern for Grad School
Did you make any new friends this year?:	heck yeah...22 of them at least
Got a job?:	technically, yeah...youth pastor
New boyfriends/girlfriends?:	nah...that kinda stuff doesn't happen in my life
Any breakups?:	well, no relationship means no breakup
Most important thing you learned in 2006::	if you believe it you can achieve it
Family life in 2006
Any new members to your family in 2006?:	um...a new step aunt.
Lose any family members this year?:	yeah. last grandma
Miss your family this year?:	eh...somewhat but not too bad, especially since i moved to chicago
Did you get along with your family in 2006?:	definitely
Did you go on a family vacation in 2006?:	cruise to ALASKA
Favorite family member in 2006?:	mikey the bro
Random questions about 2006
Did you move in 2006?:	yup. from elgin to chicago
Did you get a new hairstyle this year?:	yeah...it's rockin' out at medium now
New car?:	YES...new to me. honda accord 05
Favorite thing about 2006::	grad school? apartment? graduating?
Most hated thing about 2006::	missing friends
What was the coolest thing you did in 2006?:	led youth group to CHIC, became a therapist
Favorite movie of 2006?:	hmm...i can't remember all of 'em...
Your motto on life from 2006::	i can do it!
Strangest person you met in 2006?:	doug breunlin
Where did you spend most of your time in 2006, other than your home?:	school...either judson or NU
Did you have any car accidents in 2006?:	nope!
Would you be happy if 2007 turns out to be like 2006?:	definitely
Take this survey \| Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

9:55 PM - add eprops - add comments - email it

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