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Thursday, June 12, 2008

Friday, October 20, 2006

  • Thanks for the responses to previous blogs - Dave I promise that I will post some of those pics from our get-together, right now I'm at work and don't have them.  But I wanted to say a couple things for my fellow MA residents.

    Right now we are all seeing the disgusting ads by Kerry Healey portraying Deval Patrick as a man who believes rape is a GOOD thing.   The sheer lunacy of this campaign is typical of the tried and true method used by republicans nationwide - scare the bejesus out of people to make them vote republican.  (They've used taxes and terrorism before, why not rape?)  Healey doesn't have the women's vote, so she's trying to evoke fear in our hearts.  This is nothing short of disgusting.  Deval Patrick defended a rapist because he is a DEFENSE LAWYER.  There were real civil rights issues at stake in that case, and he got involved.  He paid for DNA testing, to try to help the accused, only to discover that the DNA proved his guilt, and he left the case.  HOW is paying for DNA testing wrong?  Our constitution guarentees that everyone deserves legal counsel, everyone deserves a fair trial.  Many of our nation's greatest leaders, from as far back as John Adams, acted on the side of defense for criminals.  Healey's attack ads against Deval Patrick are nothing short of not only an attack on the brave laywers who take on the unsavory task of defending some of our nations worst offenders, but an attack on our constitution as well.  We should not stand for it. 

    I also would like to post a letter which was sent to me today, distributed by Jane Doe, Inc.  Although it is long, it is very well written. 

    I hope that you will join me in voting for Deval Patrick this November 7th.  Romney/Healey have had enough time in the statehouse - its time for real change, and for HOPE, not FEAR, to be the driving force in our state.

     

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    We stand with victims and survivors. 

    During the past few weeks of the gubernatorial campaign, Jane Doe Inc. has watched in horror as the facts and realities of sexual and domestic violence have been distorted and manipulated for political gain.   Because we do not and cannot make endorsements of candidates, we struggled with how we could speak out as victim advocates without being pulled in to the political fray. 

    We are posting this statement to describe why we felt the latest ads released by Kerry Healey left us with no choice but to speak out and to provide victims, friends, our supporters and allies with a full explanation of our position.

    First the why.  Jane Doe has a history of speaking out when we believe an advertisement for a product or service is offensive, hurtful or exploitive to victims and survivors of violence or is an unfair representation of the dynamics of sexual and domestic violence.  For instance, this past summer, we called upon Building #19 to remove its description of tank-tops as "wife beaters."  Several years ago we mobilized a campaign to get the Boston Phoenix to stop running promotions for their personal ads that minimized the seriousness of domestic violence and restraining orders.  The misleading content of the Healey ad required a similar response. 

    Our concern with these ads is four-fold: 

    1)      We acknowledge the very real problem and fear of stranger rape, but at the same time we cannot deny, dismiss or minimize that sexual assault and rape is approximately 8 times more likely to be committed by someone who knows the victim.  What we take exception to in Healey's ad is her decision to use a fear-mongering approach rather than focusing on real solutions. By choosing these images, Healey plays on our worst fears - as women, as men, as parents, friends, colleagues - by promoting this terrible myth that women are in most danger walking alone at night when in reality they are most in danger in their own home, on a date or with someone who professes to love them.  Anyone who claims to be a victim advocate or a champion for victims' rights or even has the most remote understanding of victims' issues wouldn't do this. 

    2)      While we know that not every victim will experience these ads in the same way, we have heard from numerous advocates, counselors and survivors themselves that the messages in Kerry Healey's ad terrifies victims and discourages them from reporting the crime, seeking support or participating in the criminal justice system.  For years we've understood  from survivors that menacing images (e.g. clenched fists, black eyes, bruises) in awareness or other materials often evoke flashbacks and interfere with healing, with current relationships and with job performance. Sexual violence is the least reported and least indicted crime.  Less than 16% of all rapes are reported to police.  We do not need to create additional barriers for victims to overcome when deciding how to heal and to seek help from systems that should hold the offender accountable.    

    3)      The baiting question in Healey's second ad on this subject asks:  "Have you ever heard a woman compliment a rapist?"  The true answer is "Yes" and anyone with any experience in this field or with an understanding of the dynamics of sexual and domestic violence knows why.  Rapists and batterers are skilled manipulators; many rapists are otherwise loved community members; domestic violence batterers are often upstanding members of the community; they are members of our families, our co-workers, our neighbors and our fellow congregants. Survivors often struggle with having positive - indeed loving feelings - for the person who abused them and betrayed their trust.  Portrayals of rapists and batterers as strangers perpetuate myths that close down dialogue and keep victims further isolated.  A comment like this only serves to continue to blame victims for the insidious nature of sexual assault. 

    4)      The questions we should be asking are: Why does rape happen?  What societal and cultural norms foster tolerance about rape?  What can men and others do to challenge these norms?  Not surprisingly when raising these questions, Jane Doe Inc. has been called a "crazy bunch of man haters" on local talk radio shows.  These claims must be exposed for what they are:  an attempt to undermine our credibility with slander and a challenge to the masculinity of any man who speaks up for victims and aligns themselves with victim advocates. 

    As advocates for victims' rights, we call upon candidates for all levels of government - from governor and district attorney to the legislature and school board - to stop the fear-mongering and focus on real solutions.  We urge every voter to consider these issues when going to the polls:

    1)      Does the candidate have a full understanding of the impact of a violent society?

    2)      Does the candidate articulate solutions that are rooted in communities and neighborhoods - the places where social norms are anchored and reinforced?

    3)      Does the candidate support increased funding to support a robust network of rape crisis, domestic violence and stalking services for all victims, families and communities - including lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered people, immigrants and refugees, people with disabilities, the elderly and others?

    4)      Does the candidate have a record of setting a tone where victims are listened to and respected?

    5)      Does the candidate support legislation that will create a broader array of legal options for victims of sexual assault and stalking who are currently denied the fullest protection under the law?

    6)      Does the candidate support "Patrick's Law" which would allow a child to sever legal ties with a parent who is convicted of murdering the child's other parent?

    7)      Does the candidate have the skills, experience and vision to align best practices for police, prosecutor and judicial training to ensure that the effectiveness of the justice system in supporting victims and holding offenders accountable?

    8)      Does the candidate support or oppose proposals from Father's Rights groups to replace the current standard for "best interest of the child" in cases of child custody and visitation which would further endanger victims and children? 

    9)      Does the candidate support or oppose Governor Romney's proposal to grant state law enforcement officials with the power to enforce immigration laws that will deter even more victims of crime from seeking help from police and the judicial system?

     

    Domestic and sexual violence tears apart so many families, and our elected officials have the capacity to affect change that will have a tremendous impact on Massachusetts.  The social and policy issues that sustain violence and what we can do to stop it deserve to be front and center as election topics and dinner conversations.  We stand with victims and survivors because we know that blaming or baiting victims and victims' families or salacious headlines will get us nowhere.

     

     

    ========================================================================
     
    Comments and questions can be directed to:
     
    Toni K. Troop
    Director of Development and Public Relations
    Jane Doe Inc.
    14 Beacon Street, Suite 507
    Boston, MA  02108
    Direct:  617-557-1807
    Fax: 617-248-0902

Saturday, September 09, 2006

  • So a few quick bowling pics, because I'm getting ready to go out with Shaina today  

    The bowling alley is brand new, and was pretty cool!  Huge screens with cool music, and everything was electronic (well, except the part about throwing the ball.) 

    My wrist has been bothering me a bit recently again (damn working my wrist on the computer at work all day long).....  but I seem to have mastered the art of left handed bowling.  The last time I went lefty bowling with Shaina I bowled a 111!  Nothing that impressive this time, but I did make second place in the second game 

    The boys had a ton of fun, of course. 

    And Mama and Papa did a great job too!

     

Thursday, September 07, 2006

  • Hey there everyone - I've had requests for picks from PR, so here they come!

    To start off, I think its fitting to use a picture which is both one of my favorites from this weekend, and also, a shot that allows you to see one of my birthday presents - my new digital camera from my hubbie   Yes, we have the digital SLR, which rocks, but I'm LOVING having a little camera that fits so easily in my purse, and takes AWESOME pictures (and videos!)

    Love the camera!  You can zoom in on the pictures SO MUCH (7.2 megapixels, after all!)  And pictures just look great.  What a nice husband

    We spent the first night in PR at Sev's parents' house, where they surprised me with an amazing homemade bday cake (seriously, over 4 days, I ate half this cake myself.)

     

     

    The next morning we left for Isleta, the little island off the coast where we always go for relaxation, fun in the sun and ocean, and Veggie-Q's

     

    The weather was ridiculously perfect.  We brought goggles with us and saw SO many beautiful fish of different sizes and colors, and also an incredibly scary barracuda that looked a lot like this (I WISH I had an underwater camera with me at the time!!)

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barracuda

    After a while of staring at him, he noticed us and turned towards us - which was our signal to get the heck out of there, hehe.  But seriously, this was some of the best snorkle-free snorkling we've done

    After our (first, not last) dip in the ocean, we went back to our "bohio" (little hut area)  to have a 100% vegetarian veggie-Q!   Other veggie-Qs have gone over so well in the past, that we had no one who insisted on having meat for the day (the veggie burgers/veggie dogs/portabella caps grill up AMAZINGLY well, everyone loved them!)  We're so lucky to have such understand in-laws (after all, now all FOUR of their "children" are vegetarian!  Jose recently cut milk and rennet out of his diet too - go, Jose!)

    And of course, what blog about Puerto Rico would be complete without a picture of Jose's latest tattoos?  I think this one is the best yet!

    Next blog - what else do you do while on a tropical island, if you aren't at the beach?   Why, bowling, duh. 

Saturday, August 19, 2006

  • Hey there everyone.  I don't often proselytize on my blog about vegetarianism, but....

    here's a new reason to become vegetarian if I ever heard one.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    http://edition.cnn.com/2006/US/08/18/edible.virus.ap/index.html

    FDA approves viruses as food additive

    Bacteriophages meant to kill harmful bacteria on lunch meats

    Friday, August 18, 2006 Posted: 2231 GMT (0631 HKT)

    WASHINGTON (AP) -- A mix of bacteria-killing viruses can be safely sprayed on cold cuts, hot dogs and sausages to combat common microbes that kill hundreds of people a year, federal health officials said Friday in granting the first-ever approval of viruses as a food additive.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Think about it - do you really, really want to eat something that they need to spray VIRUSES on to keep you from getting sick??? Here's a picture for you.

    That is just fricken nasty.

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