I haven't done xanga in forever. Over it.

I'm so stressed out right now. I have so much going on, and not enough time in the day to do it. I'm tired, all the time and just want to sleep, but I'm too busy and can't do that. I want to be social and make a ton of new friends, but when the time comes to do that, I'm so exhausted and don't want to do anything. I'm sad, and I don't know why. I don't know if I like it here or not. I'm sick of my roommate and I can't even told you what she's doing. I miss all of my best friends at Purdue, and wish I could go there. I think I've made closer friends there than here. The friends I do make here, I don't keep. I think I decided today that I'd much rather have a ton more acquaintances than real friends, that way I look more popular and more people will say "Hi" to me...which is really sad. I want a good friendship...one that wants one back. I want to be pretty. I want people to like me...not 30 year old men. I want to lose weight without doing a ton of exercise and I want to lose weight by eating. I eat when I'm bored or emotional and that's really freaking sad. I want to be that one person everyone goes to, like high school. I want people to know how I feel without telling them...because I don't want to make a big deal out of it. I hate hiding my feelings, but that's just what I do. I always have to be that happy person...which is totally fine, but now? I'm over it. I've done so many awesome things for people when they've had a bad day, a bad couple of days, etc...and now I want someone to do that for me. I think I deserve that from some people. Bahhh.