| ¡Feliz año nuevo!I hope everyone had a safe night last night and that y'all rang in the new year having some fun. But, I also hope that you have thought about this year and what you want it to be; I know I have. First of all, I'll go into my night last night. I had a fun time. I've been battling with a sinus cold since Thursday  and still didn't feel completely well last night, and even some today. But, nevertheless, I still sang (not a good idea, btw) and danced all night and stayed up until 4. (Better than Kandice . . . 9 AM!!) Good gravey! It was a good time, though, spending time with some friends from High School. It's amazing to me how ppl can change so much; I sat there thinking at times "Where have I been?" and "How?" . . . I still can't fathom. Today was amazing. I started the year off with a bang that I don't plan to end. I had been thinking the past week what my "resolution" would be for the year and I do believe that I have found it: to be real with my savior and find my rest in Him, in ALL things. There has been a song on my heart this past week that I just can't get out of my head. Jonathan helped me the other day by giving me the lyrics; thanks friend. In open fields of wild flowers,
she breathes the air and flies away
She thanks her Jesus for the daises and the roses
in no simple language
Someday she'll understand the meaning of it all
He's more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close as a heartbeat or a song on her lips
Someday she'll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He'll call her and she will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and she'll pray,
I want to fall in love with You
Sitting silent wearing Sunday best
The sermon echoes through the walls
A great salvation through it calls to the people
who stare into nowhere, and can't feel the chains on their souls
He's more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close a heartbeat or a song on our lips
Someday we'll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He'll call us and we will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and we'll pray,
I want to fall in love with You
It seems too easy to call you Savior,
Not close enough to call you God
So as I sit and think of words I can mention
to show my devotion
I want to fall in love with You
my heart beats for You
~~Jars of Clay~~ This song is the exemplification of my year and what I want it to be. Today was great because I was able to begin the process. My youth minister at home asked for me and some others to meet with him for lunch and then talk about what we're dealing with in our lives. It was truly amazing and a blessing. We talked about so many things. I am glad to have his support. It ended up just being him, Haylee, and myself, but it was perfect: 3. He had a lot that he wanted to tell us that he had been studying; all things that I needed to hear. The best part that I feel that I need to incorporate into my life (although, it was all great and life changing) is . . . Hootspa (actually Chutzpah, but we'll go with Hootspa, cuz that's how you say it); it's amazing. This is used in several parts in the bible, but probably the most influencial place, to me, is in the story of Abram in Genesis 15: God's Covenant With Abram. Here the Lord and Abram talk about the things that God has promised Abram.
"'Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.'"
(revisiting Chapter 12:2) "'I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you.'"
This is where Hootspa comes in (AMAZING!!). Abram questions God. At first I thought, "how can Abram do that? I mean . . . it's GOD!!" but then talking to Rudy I became aware of Hootspa, the very thing that Abram was practicing. It is kinda hard to explain. Looking it up online, I have found it to be similar to "audacity" and "shameless boldness". The bottom line is that Abram was telling God, "Prove it." Why did this seem like such a bad thing to me at first? I now believe it to be a very important part of my walk with Christ. After saying this to God, God asks Abram to count the stars, comparing their numbers to that of his offspring. But still Abram hootspas: "O Sovereign Lord, how can I know that I will gain possession of it?" Once more Abram questions God. It is here and now that Abram enters into a blood covenant with God; an amazing thing that I now understand the importance of and am very grateful for. Thank you God for your son! Because of Abram's hootspa, we are able to be made perfect in Christ's son, Jesus, entering sainthood. He's so marvelous! So, in a nutshell, because I know you are getting tired of reading my babblings, this year I plan to practice Chutzpah and make it a priority in my life. I am very excited for the things that God has planned for me this year. He's so amazing and I so dearly "want to fall in love with [him]." I'm looking forward to it all. Hope all of you have an amazing year and that God blesses you immensely. ~Beans
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