Struggling in this together, even though I'm with you,
The more you hurt me, the less I'll miss you...

Why do things always change?

bleh....

it's been a while but I'm back..

worst day of the month and its only the second day of the month..
BUT at least I remember who I am now. Thank god for epiphany's.

It's funny, cause I know why I have become what I've become... Don't expect me to show sympathy when you don't show remorse..... bitch

What to do... what to do... if your friends are in danger, yourself is in danger, your family is in danger, and possibly... your girlfriend can be in danger?

I'm scared to face it, but I will.. I'm scared of what will happen, what the aftermath will be, but I'm prepared to do anything for my family,  I'm scared to live through it, but I'd do it so that my girlfriend won't get involved into anything she doesn't belong in.

Saturday was the best pre-valentines day in the world for me. Now this, Lord.. please watch over me, forgive me of what I'm thinking about doing... beecause I need not to do it, unless lives are threatened.

I really hate getting involved... but should I? to protect my friends? I would like to, and say I'll always be there for my friends...  But I'm afraid to involve my family into something they really don't belong in,  not my girlfriend, either. I'm not God, I can't be all seeing and all knowning.

What would you do in my shoes?

FUCK, people are pissing me off left and right. First ashley, and now my mom. I don't know wether its because i havent had a ciggarette for 3 weeks, and the withdraw effects, or they are just starting to annoy me.

damn, THANK YOU FOR THOSE WHO GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME.. ain't trying to be sarcastic, cuz im serious. life's been stressful and fucking irritating.