Old Quotes...these are some of the quotes i've accumulated over the past year or so. i just thought it'd be funny to re-post them somewhere else other than facebook.
(1) Watch the fuck where you're going, mother fucker!
-- Liz
(2) You smell like AIDS.
--Katy
(3) You're an asshole. Check it out!
-- Peyton
(4) GINNY: It's basically stealing everything from the rich to give to the poor, like that little guy, you know, the one who lives in the woods with the green tights & the little hat with the feather...what's his name?
ME: Ted Kazinsky? "
(5) "J'adore you. Je fucking can't get enough of you."
(6) ME: So.... how do they get yeast infections down there?
CHAD: Well they have yeast there.
ME: What for?? To help men rise?"
(7) But grandad.... SHE'S A HO!
-- The Patti & Dustin Show
(8) "Fuck..... how do you spell Jesus?"
-- me, on the perils of txt messaging
(9) "I've got a hole in my ass!"
-- Liz
(10) "I'm not a penis!"
--Peyton, with her turtleneck pulled up over her head
(11) "It's kind of like those Flinstones push-pops. You have to stick your tongue in the cardboard."
--Katy
(12) PEYTON: He wants to see a black movie.
KATY: What does that mean?
PEYTON: A movie about the color black.
ME: Yeah it's like The Color Purple... but darker!"
(13) "Yeah, that's about as special as being the smartest kid with Down Syndrome..."
--"Waiting..."
(14) I'm not a journalist!! I'm a biologist.
-- Laura
(15) Man, lesbian food kicks ass.
-- Jed
(16) She drives me crazy. Long blonde hair...
-- Ross's version of the song
(17) That's my love button.
-- Me
(18) My life is bri-y-ant.
-- Tyler
(19) MATT: You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
ROSS: Cut it out.
MATT: But you are.
M I A M I Q U O T E S
This would be easier if we had fucking Morgan Freeman driving our Miss Daisy asses!
--Me
(23) I can't wait until we get on the turnpike where poor people can't afford to drive.
--Me
LINDSAY: She's such a f-ing bitch.
KATY: Lindsay, how old are you?
LINDSAY: 22.
KATY: You say it then.
LINDSAY: Fucking....
--Hold me closer Tony Danza.
--I'm finding it hard to believe we're in Starkville!!
--Goodybye Miami... goodbye my friend
(Random re-writes to songs on the trip)
Have a nice day.... IN HELL!!
--Katy, Peyton & Me to bad drivers
ME: Things that rhyme with the word orange.
KATY: You're such a bitch.
--Playing categories
Dirkha dirkha dirkha. Mohammed. Jihad....Why is everyone so fucking stupid? Why can't they be interrigent, rike me?....So I'm ronery.. and rittle ronery. Poor rittle me.
--Katy, impersonating Kim Jong Il on Team America
If anyone asks, we had a dance off with Usher. And Peyton met Eddie Griffin.
--our master plan on describing our night on South Beach
GOD, I want some chocolate!
--Katy
We're good now guys. I know where we're going. FUCKING SHIT. I FUCKING HATE BAD DIRECTIONS. Ok ok ok. So we're almost there. It's all good. GODDAMNIT! WHERE'S THE FUCKING ROAD!! I WANT TO TURN AROUND AND GO HOME.... There it is. Outlet mall here we come.
--Peyton, going bipolar after a 2 hour drive to find a mall
I'm about to go home and kill some kittens.
--Katy
Do you guys smell gas?
--Katy, as she lights up her cigarette | 
