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| Saying farewellTuesday 30 September was my last official day at the nursery school. For three-and-a-half weeks I had been dreading the day as I thought I would have to say goodbye to a group of truly wonderful little people. Each child at the school is incredibly special and has taught me a lot. I have also seen how they have been nurtured over the past few months and have grown – The little boy I blogged about last time has simply soared over the past few weeks, and now plays very happily with his classmates and is exhibiting far more capability and confidence than ever before. His posture, from being the worst, has now become the best. Another little boy who is only two years old, is already doing dot-to-dot for his name. Each child has come a long way in the past few months, and it has been a very real honour to see that! But Tuesday was actually okay. In fact, until the kids all left, it was a fantastic day. Most of them brought me a card they had made (with parental input) and a small gift. The only one who didn’t was the latter boy I mentioned above, who didn’t understand that it was my last day. When his domestic told him that I wouldn’t be in the next day, he burst into tears and howled and howled. He and his domestic finally found a pen at the bottom of his bag, which he gave to me saying, ‘I got this for you!’. That little pen means the world to me now! I have attached a picture below of the cards now, proudly stuck up on my door, along with some photographs of the little school: 
    
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| Some positive experiencesI have been meaning to blog for a couple of weeks now, as I received some incredibly exciting news – I have been accepted into the Masters in Educational Psychology course! They only take between 8 – 12 people a year, and the competition is tough! After the selection process, I was actually rather unsure about whether or not I had been successful. That was when I realised just how much I really wanted to do this course. For ages, I had imagined that I wanted to go into clinical psychology, as most people who pursue psychology seem to hold this degree as the ultimate goal in the field. However, the more I learnt about (a) the clinical psych degree itself (b) the practise of clinical psychology, and (c) about myself and my innate strengths, the more I came to question this... At the beginning of this year, I realised that educvational psychology was the field in psychology that seemed the best ‘fit’ for me, and so I choose to pursue this dream. This is the sole reason I opted to do inclusive education honours this year and quit my job in a market research company to run a nursery school for a few months. And being accepted into this course was definitely a dream come true! The main reason for this blog is that the excitement that the news brought completely zapped me. It came when I was already feeling emotionally drained (and vulnerable too, I think...), and while I was really, REALLY super-excited about it, this emotional cycle of up-and-down emotions has taken it’s toll. It has just been a month or so of really intense emotional yo-yoing, and it has started to get to me. Which finally brings me to the point of this entry – I have decided to focus all my remaining energy on really positive events that have happened in the past few weeks, in an attempt to stay positive... The first event I can chat about is my clinic work. It has been very cool, because I have gotten to know a side of me that has been dormant for quite a while – my more artistic side. At the moment, this artistic side is being expressed designing toy cars and making roads / race-courses / various landscapes, but I have been having an AWESOME time with it! Amongst our various activiti es, we have crashed a Ferrari and needed to ‘dump truck’ to tow it to the mechanic, gone on safari in a Jeep, had a Formula 1 race and taken a bus to visit the seaside. I have attached some photographs below:      
What I particularly love about these pictures is his smile – the first time I asked the boy to pose with his toy car, he gave the gloomiest smile I have ever seen. In fact I remember thinking in the back of my mind that he was smiling like I would imagine Eeyore to smile. But with every passing session, his smile been getting more and more genuine and broader, and is now distinctly Tigger-like. David laughs at the fact that I have 'created' a 'smile scale' with Eeyore and Tigger as my poles at each end of the scale, like this: 
It has also been in\credible seeing the difference these few sessions have had in terms of the child’s motivation to learn (and specifically to read) and his confidence. Another positive thing I would like to blog about today is a lesson I have learnt this week. As part of our course, we are required to observe our classmates conduct their sessions at the clinic, and last week, while watching my friend conduct her session, my lecturer commented that she was containing her child really well. I hadn’t heard that term in the context of the clinic before so I asked her to explain what she meant by that, and her explanation was that my friend had absolute faith in her child, and knew that he would be able to complete the tasks assigned to him, and should he struggle with a task, my friend also had faith that with her help, he would be able to complete it eventually. This idea of having absolute faith in a child as a teaching tactic was a completely revolutionary one to me. Anyway, after my friend’s session was completed, I was chatting to her, and she shared a belief that she advocates in her classroom, which is intrinsic motivation, in other words, getting the children to do the best work they can do for themselves, and not for any extrinsic reasons (such as praise, stickers, etc). The point of this seemingly rambling paragraph is that there is a child at the bursary school, who has seemed very undeveloped, particularly for his age. His core muscles seemed to be weak, and he is stringently supervised (i.e. all the time) he often stops playing and instead lies on his stomach while rocking backwards and forwards. He seemed to lack concentration, and would even have to be reminded to chew his food. He mumbled when he spoke, especially in front on a small group. He just seemed very backwards, and it was something I was a little worried about. But this week, I decided to try a different tact – I implemented the idea of containing the child, in other words, simply having faith that he can do all the activities I want him to do. I also decided to push him to do the best that he can do. And this week has been phenomenal! Not once have I seen him lying on his stomach! He has finished his food with very little input. He has been playing with all the other children, and running about doing all sorts of different activities. I ask him to colour in the best he can colour, or build the best Duplo house he can build, and he outdoes himself. So this has taught me an extremely valuable lesson is faith and possibility... | | |
| Little wonders
On Friday night I realised that I have set myself up to get really badly hurt. For those who don’t know me very well, I should perhaps begin this post by explaining that I tend to get attached to things – I offer my love towards my grandfather’s car is proof. Truthfully, the 21-year-old car is too old, and I really ought to have purchased a new one. But it has tremendous sentimental value for me, and so I cling to it. I tend to attached immense importance to all sorts of objects. And I also tend to get very attached to people. And now I have realised that I have only got three more weeks at the nursery school. And on Friday it hit me that I have come to love those kids! They are such incredibly special little people, who have so much love and light and joy in them, and they have greatly enriched my life. I don’t feel I am exaggerating when I say I have come to love them. And in three weeks, this blissful time in my life will be over. And yes, I can still visit the school every now and again, but it’s not the same. I was really surprised when I realised how much it hurts! It took me quite a while on Saturday to verbalise this pain, and when I did David sent me off to spend some time with myself, gaining strength from things I love to heal myself in solitude. And I was a little surprised at the range of things that brought me some sense of inner peace or even happiness again in the face of this impending loss. For example, sitting on my bed and cuddling my purring cat. Or painting – an activity I have recently rediscovered. I have found that I actually love painting – I love misixing the colours to create various hues and bring some idea to life. I also watched some old musicals, such as High Society, Annie, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Gigi and Easter Parade. I always feel very hopeful and joyful after watching them, and often walk around humming tunes from them for days afterwards. The tunes that stuck in my mind this weekend were ‘A couple of swells’ from Easter Parade, and ‘Did you evah?’ from High Society. I think it’s partly because the music and lyrics are so catchy, but mainly because of the very real ‘star’ power from the actors involved – Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, Judy Garland and Fred Astaire.      I also found the soundtrack for Disney's Meet the Robinsons, a movie I loved.
It seemed a stroke of fate that I found this CD yesterday, as it had a wonderful song on the album, by Rob Thomas, entitled ‘Little Wonders’. The lyrics seemed to speak to me, and I played the track repeatedly on Saturday, and even subjected David and Duncan to it. I have posted the lyrics below: Little Wonders – Rob Thomas Let it go,
Let it roll right off your shoulder
Don't you know
The hardest part is over
Let it in,
Let your clarity define you
In the end
We will only just remember how it feels
Our lives are made
In these small hours
These little wonders,
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away,
But these small hours,
These small hours still remain
Let it slide,
Let your troubles fall behind you
Let it shine
Until you feel it all around you
And I don't mind
If it's me you need to turn to
We'll get by,
It's the heart that really matters in the end
Our lives are made
In these small hours
These little wonders,
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away,
But these small hours,
These small hours still remain
All of my regret
Will wash away somehow
But I can not forget
The way I feel right now
In these small hours
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away but these small hours
These small hours, still remain,
Still remain
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away
But these small hours
These little wonders still remain While out on Saturday evening with Dave and Duncan, we went to Sandton City to look for more musicals for me and some Xbox games for David. When out, we bumped into Neil and Paul, and seeing them so unexpectedly made me realise how incredibly special they are to me and how much happiness they bring to my life. Seeing Paul was especially an unexpected treat, as I still expect him to be at Caltech – I guess I am still adjusting to having the two Paul’s back in Joburg. The point of this particular entry is to focus on the positive, and especially on the small pleasures that add so much to life. There are times when the little things may be lost in the pain or sorrow, but they are always there, so it’s just about knowing what they are and bringing them into your life. | | |
| Sarah Palin - an advocate of animal cruelty?This is an entry explaining why I am vehemently opposed to Sarah Palin. Over the last few days I have been reading up on Sarah Palin, who is the Republican party’s vice-presidential choice. She and her family have been in the news since John McCain announced his VP choice, and due to my interest in American politics, I made a point of reading up a bit on her. I have since come to the conclusion that, in my opinion, she is a vile woman. I do not particularly care that her school-going teenage daughter is pregnant. Nor do I mind that her boyfriend appears to be very unpleasant, and despite the reports that he will marry this girl, he appears to be the antithesis of a decent family man. I do not care that she is anti-abortion. I do not care that she has recently given birth to a son with down’s syndrome. (Incidentally, I do believe that every woman should have the choice whether or not to carry through a pregnancy – something that she does NOT believe). I do object a bit that she is pro the death penalty – the contradiction of these two beliefs (anti-abortion and yet pro-death penalty) clearly eludes her! I do mind a bit that she has taken money that was in the budget for libraries and museums and channelled it into sports. However, this philistine-like strategy clearly has appeal for some people, and in truth, it does not really concern me that libraries in Alaska are being neglected in favour of sports. Personally, I disapprove of her pro-gun policy, as quite frankly, the world does not need more guns and more liberal laws regarding these weapons. Having said this, she is a republican, and as such, cannot be held responsible for this policy. However, I do object to her animal cruelty! I quote from a co-op piece she wrote in January: “are worthy of our utmost efforts to protect them and their Arctic habitat. But adding polar bears to the nation's list of endangered species, as some are now proposing, should not be part of those efforts." She believes that to protect polar bears, an endangered species, is not as important as offshore drilling! 
She also is an avid moose hunter. Now, moose are not the most beautiful animal to have ever walked this earth. Nor do they possess the ‘cute’ factor. 
But they feel pain. And I object to hunting for sport. Period. I do not approve when I see images of the British royal family hunting, and in fact, this is the reason I dislike and disapprove of that whole family. Truly, to inflict torturous pain on a defenceless animal should never, ever be allowed. It amounts to animal cruelty. It’s as simple as that. It is wrong. Morally, ethically, and even on the simple level of decency. To laud the people who do inflict such unbearable pain, should be unthinkable! To think that this woman could be the vice-president (or worse, the president if anything happens to McCain) is unfathomable! | | |
| On becoming an honourary aunt!Today was a super-exciting day! As I have mentioned in previous posts, David’s older sister Keera was pregnant. It was a long pregnancy, nearing the end of it’s 42nd week. As it was far along, they had to have a caesarean birth, which was scheduled for this morning. And at 6:05, she gave birth to a baby girl, named Gabrielle, or Gaby for short. She weighed 3.7 kgs, and is the cutest little baby! I was really, really lucky, as I was invited to be present at the hospital this morning with the rest of the family, and it was so lovely to watch Keera and her little family bond! As I am not technically part of the family, I am the ‘honourary aunt’ and Gaby my ‘honourary niece’, and I am very much looking forward to developing this particular relationship. David and I had a small taste of ‘baby-sitting’ earlier today (i.e. 5 minutes of unsupervised time with the baby while Keera and her husband were with the nurse), and I am pleased to announce that we did okay with it J The baby has the cutest, tiny, wrinkled feet and amazingly long fingernails on her tiny perfect fingers. Her tiny mouth kept opening and closing and making the funniest, sweetest ‘baby noises’ – there is no other way to describe it! I will post some photographs as soon as I can... It was a magical experience, and a very exciting one J | | |
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