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classax327
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Name: Andrew
Country: United States
State: Tennessee
Metro: Chattanooga
Birthday: 3/27/1988
Gender: Male
Interests: Jesus Christ is my interest, everything else is kind of a side-note...my saxophone, aquariums, being with my friends, girls, having a good laugh, being with family, photography, astronomy, sleeping, and beekeeping
Expertise: All of the above...except girls.
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  classax410
Member Since:
8/22/2005
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| Pain is heavy. Weighing down upon my heart, I am now culpable. Faced with fear, anger, helplessness the only place to turn is the Saviour. He has suffered and endured every pain and sorrow, every tear and whimper, every scream and terror, every broken piece of this humanity He bore. Why then do I feel so futile in my thoughts and emotions? Why must I think that I have the power and ability to change such a fate? Why am I unwilling to admit that only He can heal the pain, the burden, the anger. . .in me.
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| I'm always surprised when I am awakened to the realization that I have so much to learn and a sea of thoughts yet to contemplate. How do I get off thinking that I suddenly have things figured out or presuming that life just falls into place. God grants me an answer to a prayer that has been on my heart for so long, and then I assume that I can just solve it all unaided. I certainly still have much to learn and my pride loves to steal the spotlight away from what my life is truly about - Christ. Breaking the strongholds of pride and the lies that are directed at my weak, mealymouthed flesh is not an easy fight. James 5:16 rings true in my ear, and yet, am I righteous? am I fervent in my prayer? II Corinthians 10 tells me that we are destroying things raised up against the knowledge of God, but what does the enemy think when I am trespassing into his property? I'm so afraid that I will seek to do things in my own strength. I know the only way to live the abundant life that Jesus describes is to put my all in Him. He is. May I glorify and praise Him even in the fight.
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| Nearly done with finals, and yet, I don't the end of the semester doesn't feel like I think it should. Instead of summation and finality (no pun intended) there is an expectation and a readiness in my spirit that seems uniquely placed in me. I would expect that at the end of a semester that has been poured into the Word and friends and A&P there would be the closing of a door, not the opening of one. Seeing opportunity to grow and continue in the way becomes the joy of the journey, instead of the weariness of the traveler. As I head into Christmas Break, I am excited to work with Will, Nic, and Steve again, and to enjoy being free of school responsibilities, but a large part of me will be in Dayton, waiting for the middle of January. I pray that my walk will not falter and that my heart will be prepared for the changes that God has in store for me in the coming year.
"He alone is faithful and true, He alone knows what is best for you...when you don't understand, when you can't find His plan, when you can't trace His hand, trust His heart..."
To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.
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| Finals week, fall semester of my sophomore year, and I feel like I don't know where it's all gone. 2 weeks from a new year. A month from something that's been building and growing and changing me. Finishing strong is something I normally do, but I feel myself slacking. There's so many better things to do than study. Talking to friends, enjoying the weather, playing games, reading the Word, praying about things that matter... and yet, I'm here for the purpose of academic pursuit. Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. I've seen myself grow so much more in other areas than in academics. Valuing friendships and people. Understanding how much different people are from me. Learning how to manage myself, my time, my money. Taking steps into the unknown of relationships. Trying to lead, trying to listen, trying to fill the role that is mine, trying to be open. Listening to God. Being consistent about filling my mind with His Word. Praying for others regularly. . . . and not one of these really relates to the development of my mind for the betterment of understanding and receiving knowledge. I'm seeing myself grow, but I wonder, 'where is my focus?' What are the things I can't live without on a day to day basis. And with that in mind, I know that time in the Word and in prayer and in listening is what I'm developing, and I'm ok with that. I realize that my priorities can shift and slide and subvert this, and so I am wary, but I also know that as I seek His guidance, He will. Through others, through His Word, through time spent being quiet.
I hope this week will show that He is once again the only One who can take me from my broken, fallen, human state and change me more into His image.
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| It really has been a long month... November has spanned quite a lot in my life...
-A hayride at my house with some of my good friends from school. Awesome food, fun games, worship, and a great hayride of course!
-A Musical Showcase in Rudd where I got to perform the Creston after 5 years of learning, practicing, and perfecting.
-A conversation with a close friend that might've saved an important friendship.
-A small discipline in the Word that has yielded a grateful attitude to His Truth.
-A trip to Ohio which was important for my family, but felt utterly pointless to me. It was good because it could've been so much worse.
-An eye-opening experience into my own heart and its sick and broken state.
-A friendship of honesty that is growing into something very special and very exciting and very good.
December is hiding around the corner, with tests and projects and finals, but I'm not phased. I've done this before. God is good, and He will sustain me as I fall on Him for the strength of my life.
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