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who am i?
My head knocks against the stars. My feet are on the hilltops. My finger-tips are in the valleys and shores of universal life. Down in the sounding foam of primal things I reach my hands and play with pebbles of destiny. I have been to hell and back many times. I know all about heaven, for I have talked with God. I dabble in the blood and guts of the terrible. I know the passionate seizure of beauty And the marvelous rebellion of man at all signs reading "Keep Off." My name is Truth and I am the most elusive captive in the universe.
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Tuesday, February 07, 2006
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so monday i was an hour late to work. i rushed to make it, but the
thousands of acres brush fire raced across the toll road forcing them
to block the road just before i wanted to take it. i drove
around, but it was like night time with all the ash raining down and
the sun obscured by the smoke. it was this eerie brown/yellow
light all around. the air hurt to breath. can see it for 30
miles. so now i have to drive the long way to work (an extra 30
minutes) until they can get this dang fire out. it's be going
good for 3 days now. they've evacuated 2000 homes. also last night i dreamt about getting hit by a car. i was all afraid because i NEVER have bad dreams, ever. like really, never. i'm happy as a clam. so needless to say, i was shook up all day. it was so vivid and real, it really freaked me out. and i don't freak easy. so i was relieved today when i didn't get run over ( i can say that now i hope being home with no way a car could run me over... 2nd floor), but so as i was driving home... just outta the blue... i hear this loud whack...and then my car sharts shimmying and i smell burning rubber. i pull off to the shoulder on the freeway... and there I am... changing my tire on the freeway. just like my mommy always warns me... people are hit all the time changing tires on the side of the road... it's the most dangerous place you can be... the number one way people get hit... i can't help but read into the connection with my dream. i've never had a blow out and i've never had to change my tire on the side of the road, let alone the freeway in the dark by myself. but then again, i never dreamt i got run over by a car before either. |
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Sunday, December 11, 2005
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google earth is crazy. addictive.
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Sunday, November 20, 2005
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desert trip with coworkers last weekend (11/12/05ish). took
friday off to make it 3 days of fun. rode go-carts, an offroad
golf cart, dirt bikes (250, 400, 500cc), a pocket sport bike, atv's
across desert. shot lotsa guns: an sks, a mauser with 1938
surplus ammo (that is a ridiculously huge and loud rifle), tons of clay
pigeons with a variety of shotguns (12gauge, 16gauge, .410),
miscellaneous handguns (9mm, .357), and for breakfast an AR-15 (aka
"m-16", my ears rang for 3 days after shooting it after forgetting to
put in ear plugs.) burned everything we could find in huge ass bonfires
at night (aerosol cans etc..).. and also the right half of a magnesium
crankcase from a vw... looked like a huge flare in the fire, ultra
bright looking white light... shot off blue firework looking sparks...
poofed up big when dumped water on it... but actually not all that
amazing... wasn't quite like "light up the whole desert" like some
people were anticipating... burned for about 15 minutes...
miscellanoues flare shot gun rounds (looked like lil bottle rockets)
... shot propane tanks with flares on them... they'd fly up in the air
in a ball of fire and spin around... and of course... did all this
while basically being drunk for 2 days straight... went to downtown fullerton this most recent friday night because a coworker had restarted his reggae band / was learning to dj... so about 30 coworkers turned out and we got all drunk and danced around. i realized i haven't been to downtown fullerton in like a whole year... a lot of hte places have expanded/remodeled... back alley is like twice as big as before.. now several of them are charging cover because apparantely the asshole firemarshals readjusted the capacity so low that they can't make profit without cover. i'd kinda felt like "oh yeah i go to downtown fullerton a lot"... but then down there... i'm like damn i haven't been here in a long ass time... it's just funny how things change when yer not looking... time flies. even friggin best buy that i went to on saturday had things all rearranged and a new look... i was like "what the hell, when was the last time i even went to best buy!" went to the USC vs. Fresno State football game last night at LA colliseum... crowd at 91,000 people... so ridiculous packed in in that place... USC was real cool before....walked around campus chuggin beers... they really go crazy for every football game... like mardi gras or something... fresno state was ranked 17, but they gave usc a good run for their money... way closer than we thought... the fire chief for fresno was sitting in front of us yelling "that's another 1st down for fresno state!"... it was fun... game ended a lil after 11... but spent literally an hr parked in the garage not moving an inch just waiting to get out... we were on the 5th floor and basically the other floors had to clear entirely before anyone could get out... finished reading 'scar tissue' after several months due to a combination of reading less and less and putting this one on hold... it was hard to read... it's basically just a recount of anthony kiedis' (lead singer of red hot chilli peppers) constant and ongoing battle with heroin addiction and his countless binges... after reading it was just like sick to my stomach with the thought of addiction... man i needa start working on my own addictions... the whole book was just like "why can't this guy just get his shit in order" kinda tortous frustrating... but hey it's full of sex drugs and rock and roll so i had to read it just outta morbid curiosity... beyond just being a showcase of those things... and an example of horrible heroin addiction is.... didn't have much else to offer... but i dilligently chugged through it after having started it several months ago (and readin other books instead)...
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Monday, October 31, 2005
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so i was on the upper deck at the driving range with mr. woo sunday and
we were totally sucking, hitting all kinds of crap shots. behind me i
hear this guy go "rooooarrrr" and then "thump" and look behind me and i
see some guy laying on the deck. i was like "oh man this guy
takes this game waaaay too serious doing kamakazee dives into benches"
so i hit a few more balls and realize the guy isn't moving. then
woo and i start hearing weird animal like noises... and we're like
"hmmm craaazy guy..." but then eventually we're like "hmmm somethings
not quite right..." so we go over to him and he's convulsing eyes
rolled back into his head foaming at the mouth all like crazy zombie
style and he's like damn near biting his tongue off... we approach and
we're like "umm are u alright" and his eyes roll back to look at us...
but it's a distinctly vacant stare... the kind of glazed over other
worldly anasthetic stare all my piggies made after i'd shot them up in
the ass with a buncha ketamine and xylacine... so we're like "dooo dooo this guys having a seizure!" and he's foaming at the mouth so much he's like starting to choke on his own foamy spit... so we're like "hey! lets roll him over into left lateral recumbent!" then we like hold him down so he doesn't bang his shit so much and his girlfriend comes running back going "ooooh my god!!!" and then the paramedics show up in like 3 minutes flat right when the guys starting to snap out of it... and he's like "whoa... what's going on?" lucky he didn't lunge the other way off the second story deck. so then i go back to hitting, and like i hit waaay better... just goes to a show... a good seizure now and then can be exactly what ya need to get yerself outta a golf funk. i was like "gee that's cool, i've never had a seizure." so anyway, apparently the guy had a bad back and the doctor prescribed ultram (tramadol) ironically the very first thing online about the drug on yahoo! health is: "What is the most important information I should know about tramadol? Seizures have been reported as a rare side effect of treatment with tramadol. The risk of
seizures may be increased in patients who take more than the prescribed dose, have a history of
seizures or epilepsy, have head trauma, have a metabolic disorder, have a central nervous system
infection, are experiencing alcohol or drug withdrawal, or are taking certain medications. Talk to your
doctor about factors that may increase the risk of seizures during treatment." so um i think like he started having a seizure then he banged his
head reeeal hard on the bench when he fell, multiplying the effects...
but um wow "what's the most important thing i should know about
tramadol?- "seizures." wow... now that's an understatement. |
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Monday, October 24, 2005
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kroq presents "weezer and the foo fighters" at long beach arena...
birthday surprise... girlfriend tells me to save the date but won't
tell me what... for days i make i correct guesses, then even on the way
there i don't even know it's a concert till i see the concert signs...
but still no idea who the band will be... so we make it all the way
into the arena before i even realize where i am... for some reason i'd
totally missed hearing there was any such concert and so had no idea
until i saw the merchandise booths selling t-shirts. so yeah, weezer... excellent show. looks like they're trying out some new things... some mystery guitar guy playing for rivers while rivers took brakes playing keyboard or synthesizer or drums... scott did some kinda crazy bass guitar solo type things... like rocking harder than weezer usually rocks... then they randomly covered blurs "song 2"... as played to death as that song is... it was just kinda cool to see weezer do a cover. then they invited some random chunky asian guy onstage to play guitar for one song along with the band. definitely some kind of new weezer in the works. excellent show. rivers kept doing some hideous looking dance... that looked like a retired citizen in florida doing some kind of happy dance while playing shuffleboard... but regardless it was cool to see him trying to involve the crowd more / getting more bold... he wasn't wearing glasses... look kinda drably dressed but it was kinda cool for half a song where he put some ball cap low over his eyes so he kinda looked like a cholo... didn't end with "only in dreams" this time... played island in the sun accousically after running all the way back through the crowd... excellent weezer show... but then dave grohl came on... and it was just like "damn weezer does look like a buncha boring dorks in comparison. as dave said the night before had left him in need of the classic "hair of the dog remedy" and he appeared noticeably drunk. he was funny though with lil interludes talking up the crowd... all the songs seemed noticeably harder than on the albums with more intricate guitar solos making long detours to the song then smashing violently back into roaring overdriven choruses... they really rocked... it was awesome... kinda made fun of weezer a bit... though dave said "rivers cuomo sure can hit a beer bong!" then dave vowed to "steal all the weezer fans away into the drunken sloppy rock of the foo fighters" he did a shout out to his wife and his grandma who were in the mosh pit. (also, hot hot heat opened for both of them.) anyway what a wonderful birthday surprise, and a great night of rock and roll. coincidentally, we had to work the next day though... so i'm a bit short on sleep. anyway, till next time...
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